The Bad LotR Fan Fic Drinking Game

[Ibrîniðilpathânezel]

Well, we have one vote for a Middle-earth parody presented in the mode of Brideshead Revisited (in this case, Bag-end revisited), and we also have a vote for Riverdale High School (teenage Elven angst).

If you go for the latter, it should be "Rivendale" (because you won't believe how many times I've seen it spelled that way -- and not as a typo, consistently throughout the story, which makes it obvious the writer never cracked the books, but spelled it the way s/he "heard" it in the movies. You ask why I bother ever actually reading some of this? For someone who has been both a writer and professional editor, it's like watching a train wreck. Compelling in its sheer horror... ). And it seems that a true Mary Sue is never merely Elven. They're almost always some combination of Elf/Human, Elf/Istari (almost never in the singular, mind you, I guess that i on the end must sound cooler or something), all three, or even Elf/Hobbit. Never Elf/Dwarf. A pity -- now, that could be a real source of teenage angst, an outcast even to herself, because everyone knows how terribly Elves hate Dwarves, so of course the MS would be torn between hating and loving herself, and would need the Love of A Good Elf to teach her just how Wonderful and Special she really is...

Good lord, I think I feel my gorge rising at the very thought... or a severe case of sugar shock coming on....