Tolkien Action figures you won't find in stores.

[Bêthberry]

A Lobelia Barbie.

Balrog transformer. With or without wings.

[the phantom]

Now, introducing the new Turin Turumbar action figure! A curse to all who harbor him, your house is certain to fall down in ruin within days of bringing him home. He also can tell what factory other toys were made in and will attempt to breed with any toy from the same factory as himself.

And who wouldn't want Celeborn with gift-giving action? Celeborn strolls around tossing random gifts to other action figures, unless they are a dwarf. Celeborn tends to pop the heads off dwarf figurines unless a Galadriel figure is there to restrain him.

And no Tolkien collection would be complete without Smeagol/Gollum. It's like two toys in one! Just press the button on his back to transform him. Both modes have their own advantages. Smeagol features Deagol-strangling action. Gollum tells riddles and tries to kill you if you answer incorrectly.
(a note from the manufacturer: you should keep an eye on the toy when in Gollum mode- it has a tendency to trip and fall into every large, open pit it gets too close to)

[Ainaserkewen]

How about a Tickle-Me Ulmo? rimshot

This made me laugh...eheh. Sapphire_Flame I'm trying to think of why it would include, but all I'm gettting is a "Toss and Tickle-Me Ulmo." Not quite as funny.

"And now you too can get the Ernie the Oliphaunt action figure. He even makes real Oliphaunt sounds and demolishes any convertible that Legolas Barbie would come with. Want to impress your friends, want to step on their action figures? Then get Ernie the Oliphaunt this Christmas."

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Okeydokey... What I would never buy my prospective children that do not exist and will not for some number of years:

Prince Imrahil with complimentary Bouquet of Forget-Me-Nots. And shiny cape.

Hal...dir... er um... barad... With Grey Company Retaking Action and Subdued [non-sparkly] Armor.

Bossy Bombadil with Ludicrous Pet Naming Action! Buy him at a PetSmart near you!

Bar-room Pippen with Pint-Sloshing Action. Really says the words "Sure I know Frodo, he's over there! See? Him. Hey FRODO! This guy in a black cape wants to talk to you."

Xenarwen with Ayayayayay Action.

Fea

[Lalwendë]

You could have a Ringbearer Gift Set, including Frodo, Sam and Gollum, but with a twist, it could include an exclusive, in this set only, not available separately (apart from e-bay) Mount Doom. This would be like those splendidly dangerous chemistry sets you used to get way back when toys really were fun (and potentially lethal), with its own mini bunsen burner, easily explodable test tubes and some chemical that would give the appearance of magma. It would burn a hole in the living room carpet, but hey-ho!

What about, for the really serious collector, Barrow-Downer action figures? Mine would be space-cadet Lalwende with breaking the light action feature.

[Boromir88]

I don't think I can view this thread much longer, I'm cracking up so bad I might bust a spleen, or an appendix. Tickle-me-Ulmo, haha.

[The Saucepan Man]

What about, for the really serious collector, Barrow-Downer action figures?

In that case, how about a HerenIstarion the Munificent™ figure with thread bumping action. He is programmed to recognise clever remarks, which cause him to wave his magic repping wand.

Or a Barrow-Wight™ figure with thread deleting action, programmed to make a wry comment when you say something stupid. Oh, and he glows green in the dark.

And what about Eowyn the Disco Queen? Comes with Fog Machine™ and bell bottom jeans.

Hmm, sounds like she would be a Bratz doll. I know all about Bratz. My daughter has moved on from Barbie ...

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Hahaha... HerenIstarion... hilarious.

What about.... Oath-giving Feanor with Kinslaying Action? Don't give it to family members for Christmas!

Fea

Edit: Saucepan: If it helps... I just spent a weekend with TEN girls who have moved on from Barbies to Bratz.