The Bad LotR Fan Fic Drinking Game

[satansaloser2005]

I asked Emily if she'd like to contribute anything. She gave me the above, then came up with more. Heh.

If Frodo does not sail: 1 shot.
Because he's found healing by falling in Wuv: 2 shots.
If Pippin has "Speshul Faerie Powers" because Somebody took one line in The Hobbit waaaay out of proprotion: 1 shot.
If the hobbits are ever described as "snuggling": chug some Dramamine.

And an addition to my "cerulean orbs" comment: Drink a pint of Butterbeer if Frodo got them from his mum.

[Nerwen]

"Story" is a thinly-veiled attempt to promote the author's religion or political cause. –take a shot. Two if this is completely out of place in Middle-earth.

–A thinly-veiled attempt to promote the author's personal interest/hobby. –take a shot. Again, take another if this is highly unlikely to be popular in M-e.

–A thinly-veiled attempt to promote the author's sexual fetish. –take two shots. Take three more if said kink involves rape, torture, bestiality or incest. If it involved more than two of these... shoot yourself.

[Kitanna]

Hero/Heroine is a wielder of magic in a Harry Potter, we can all be wizards, sort of way - take a shot
Frodo has a half-elf, half-hobbit child* - Take two shots
Fellowship reunites - take a shot
There's another dragon to kill or it'll ruin everyone's life for realz - Take a shot
Author admits to never having read the books and based it on the movies - take three shots and cry

* Found this one floating about and I laughed quite hard.

[Thenamir]

You know, I might take it on as a personal challenge to write every one of these items into a single story (minus the slash/sexual parts) and thus create some kind of mass-comatose binge.

It'll have to wait until I can get the next post for REB III up...which has been in the works for, what, 10 months now?

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Thenamir

You know, I might take it on as a personal challenge to write every one of these items into a single story (minus the slash/sexual parts) and thus create some kind of mass-comatose binge.

It'll have to wait until I can get the next post for REB III up...which has been in the works for, what, 10 months now?

If you would care to have an accomplice, I would love to add a character to the mayhem. Perhaps a few roleplayers could make the most wretched "Mary-Sue and the Middle-earth High School Massacre, Part IV: The Seduction of Arwen's Blind Sister" ever created.

I even have the perfect starting sentence:

"It was a dark, stormy night."

*The Dark Elf takes a shot for even thinking of something so diabolical*

[Gwathagor]

Wormwood liquor...is that the same thing as absinthe?

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Gwathagor

Wormwood liquor...is that the same thing as absinthe?

Yes, it is. Yet in context with Elves in trees and branches, I went with the 'wormwood' connotation instead. But as they say, "Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder."

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Thenamir

You know, I might take it on as a personal challenge to write every one of these items into a single story (minus the slash/sexual parts) and thus create some kind of mass-comatose binge.

It'll have to wait until I can get the next post for REB III up...which has been in the works for, what, 10 months now?

Originally Posted by Morthoron

If you would care to have an accomplice, I would love to add a character to the mayhem. Perhaps a few roleplayers could make the most wretched "Mary-Sue and the Middle-earth High School Massacre, Part IV: The Seduction of Arwen's Blind Sister" ever created.

I even have the perfect starting sentence:

"It was a dark, stormy night."

*The Dark Elf takes a shot for even thinking of something so diabolical*

I repeat my offer to anyone who is interested in writing the most dreadful RP ever created. I am in the process of having the dwarves create a prosthetic finger for Frodo so that he won't be so melancholy, and be whole, and find the Hobbit boy of his dreams.

[Nerwen]

Me! Me!

[Kitanna]

Originally Posted by Morthoron

I repeat my offer to anyone who is interested in writing the most dreadful RP ever created. I am in the process of having the dwarves create a prosthetic finger for Frodo so that he won't be so melancholy, and be whole, and find the Hobbit boy of his dreams.

Me sir!