What do you assign to Mordor?

[Lalwendë]

Originally Posted by Mithalwen

Well Jeffrey Archer didn't actually go to boarding school - I rather think that was one of the creative amendments to his CV - and my Pa was warned to be wary of Mr Jeffrey Rat when he was in practice in Oxford forty years ago....

Well my state school had the "Bronco" style grease proof paper type paper with "Hampshire County council Now wash your hands " printed on it .... now that was something that belonged in Mordor ..

Well there's two things for Mordor anyway! Jeffrey Archer and Izal toilet paper. Funny how certain things never seem to stick to either....

I'm assigning to Mordor irrational fear of getting pecked by birds. I've been in Bakewell today and was feeding some geese and swans right out of my hands. Um, how can people think they could hurt you when they have spoon shaped beaks? The one of the bigger geese came up and decided he was going to hiss at me for some unknown bird reason, prompting me to stand there saying "go on then, tough guy, let's see what you're made of". He was all mouth. It gave the pensioners watching a laugh anyway.

I'm also assigning Vicki Pollard style shop assistants. Grrrrrr................