Middle Earth Idol

[Mithalwen]

2 days as in Monday? Yes please .. can do that

[Sleepy Ranger]

Yeah, you have till Monday.

[Gurthang]

*clears throat* Well, here we are again for another delightful round of Gurthang-don't-know-his-genres-well-enough. I was pretty much limited to Ray Charles, BB King, and Aretha Franklin. I couldn't find any BB King anywhere, and TORE has (under my guidance) done a song by Ray already, so I didn't want to double up. So it was Aretha that I chose, which now means it will look like I'm copying off Celuien and will be doubling up anyway. I don't suppose you'd believe I had the song done before she had posted hers? Anyway, my song is simple called Silmaril and I will be singing as Thingol to Beren regarding his daughter and the fetching of a Silmaril. (listen to Respect by Aretha Franklin to get a feel of how it might sound.)


(oo) What you want
(oo) Beren, I got
(oo) What you need
(oo) Do you know I got it?
(oo) All I'm askin'
(oo) Is for a little Silmaril when you come back (just a little one)
Hey Beren (just a little one) when you get back
(just a little one) mister (just a little one)

I ain't gonna do you harm that's what I swore
Ain't gonna do you harm (oo) But what I want (oo)
All I'm askin' (oo)
Is for a little Silmaril when you come back (just a little one)
Beren (just a little one) when you get back (just a little one)
Yeah (just a little one)

If I'm to give you my daughter's hand
And all I'm askin' in return is a gem
You should hold me generous
When you come back (just a, just a, just a, just a)
Yeah Beren (just a, just a, just a, just a)
When you get back (just a little one)
Yeah (just a little one)

------ instrumental break ------

Ooo, your deeds (oo)
Braver than many (oo)
But guess what? (oo)
I love my daughter plenty (oo)
So I want you to do (oo) for me
Is give me a Silmaril when you come back (Sil, Sil, Sil, Sil)
Yeah Beren (Sil, Sil, Sil, Sil)
Bring it to me (Silmaril, just a little one)
When you get back, now (just a little one)

S-I-L-M-A-R-I-L
Find and bring one back to me
S-I-L-M-A-R-I-L
That is what it must be

Oh (bring it to me, bring it to me,
bring it to me, bring it to me)
A little Silmaril (bring it to me, bring it to me,
bring it to me, bring it to me)
Whoa, Beren (just a little one)
A little Silmaril (just a little one)
I'm not lyin' (just a little one)
About this errand (just a little one)
So you better start movin' (just a little one)
Times is wastin' (just a little one)
(Sil, Sil, Sil, Sil) 'maril
When you come back (Sil, Sil, Sil, Sil)
If you should walk in (Silmaril, just a little one)
You must have a gem (just a little one)
I got to have (just a little one)
A little Silmaril (just a little one)

[The Saucepan Man]

Ahem! Apologies for the delay.

The Wikipedia entry for rhythm and blues provides a rather extensive list of artists associated with the genre, including some very well-known acts (including Sade, Mith). Yet still I found it hard to settle on a suitable song.

In the end, I chose a touching ditty concerning misplaced love, by the popular Middle-earth singer, Estel Wingfoot (formerly of the Wingfoot 5).

*The lights dim and then brighten again slightly to reveal a dark figure (sans pans) sporting a fedora and ranger cloak. The stage has been transformed into a cobbled street. As the music begins, the Saucepan Man (for 'tis he) begins to advance down street, lighting the cobblestones as he steps on them in time with the beat. Occasionally he stops to moonwalk, juggle his fedora, spin on the spot and clutch his (erm) ranger tackle, shrieking tunefully as he does so.*

She was more like a glacial queen of the Rohirrim
I said fair maid, but what do you mean I am the one
Who will fight in the war, win renown
She said I am the one, who will fight in the war, win renown

She told me her name was Éowyn, of Théoden’s kin
Then her head turned with eyes that dreamed of being the one
Who will fight in the war, win renown

Gilraen always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young maid’s hearts
And Arwen always told me be careful on your quest
And be careful of what you do 'cause my eye is fixed on you (hey hey)

Éowyn is not my lover
But she's a girl who thinks that I am the one
And her cage is now undone
She thinks I am the one, and her cage is now undone

From Dunharrow down the eastward road
To war with the men she rode
She made her stand, said she was no man
Took the Witch-King down
Almost died in the war with renown
So take my strong advice, just remember that maidens can fight (they can fight)

She laid out cold in the White City
The infirmary
Then athelas brought her back to life
And her eyes then met mine
She who fought in the war with renown (baby)

Gilraen always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young maid’s hearts
From the moment she first saw me
‘Twas a shadow she pursued
But she resolved to face her doom
When I rode into the tomb (hey hey)

Éowyn is not my lover
But she’s a girl who thinks that I am the one
And her cage is now undone

Éowyn is not my lover
But she’s a girl who thinks that I am the one
And her cage is now undone
She thinks I am the one, and her cage is now undone

She thinks I am the one, and her cage is now undone

Éowyn is not my lover
But she’s a girl who thinks that I am the one
And her cage is now undone
She thinks I am the one, and her cage is now undone

She thinks I am the one, and her cage is now undone
She thinks I am the one

Éowyn is not my lover
Éowyn is not my lover
Éowyn is not my lover
Éowyn is not my lover
Éowyn is not my lover
Éowyn is not my lover

*Fade out*

[Mithalwen]

Mithalwen arrives late as usual, her flustered state not entirely due to having to pour herself into quite such tight trousers and scrape her hair back so hard. She sings as Galadriel about Saruman :

Smooth talking traitor.

He's allying with a different strength
And playing a dangerous game.
Placing high stakes, making hearts ache.
He's named in many languages.
Curunir and Saruman, Sharku or Curumo.
Eru help him, when he falls.

Palantir life, Ainur boy.
We move to late against Dol Guldur - that was your ploy.
Honeyed lies and Uruk Hai,
When you require the ring and desire for higher heights.

No place for nostalgia or trusting hearts
When kings are bewitched,
Tree-lords are stirring, and realms fall apart.


No need to ask.
He's a smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor

Coast to coast, Valinor to Endor, Maia of Aulë .
Between Arnor and Gondor, in Orthanc, loyalty for sale.

Face to face, each classic case.
We shadow box
you double cross,
Yet need the chase.

A council to lead, duty to uphold.
Betrays all his allies, he wants the ring of gold.
His voice is an angel's but his heart is cold.

No need to ask.
He's a smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,

Coast to coast, Valinor to Endor, Maia of Aulë .
Between Arnor and Gondor, in Orthanc, loyalty for sale.

Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor,
Smooth talking traitor...

If this ain't RnB I am sorry.. I have a complete mental block on this that I am unabke to identify in my mind the genre even though I know some of the songs others have used. It probably doesn't help that I thought Ray Charles was a ventriloquist .....

[Sleepy Ranger]

Voting is now open. Please send your votes to either Glirdan or me. Voting will be open till the 16th.

[Sleepy Ranger]

Elempi

That was a marginally above average performance. You didn't have any bad parts so to so and it was a rather smooth performance. You enjoy yourself out there and you can entertain as well. You dance like a drunk hippo though...

The Only Real Estel

That was an... excellent... performance. Well done young man. I think the competition has reached a stage where even the smallest mistake could get you eliminated. I don't think you should worry, you seem to have made no mistakes.

Celuien

I think that was a rather weak performance. You could have done so much better but instead you churned out a rather average and not at all entertaining song. I've heard better things at Karaoke Queen.

Gurthang

Once again you have shown why you are my favorite. You sang that very well and I was entertained this week as well, I'd like to see you win this competition. Good luck.

Saucepanman

I am shocked. You really can sing. You don't dance that bad either. Ahem, apart from that the song had some shaky parts but I think you did alright.

Mithalwen

I heard you were a nervous wreck before this round and were considering leaving. I must say for someone in that sort of state you've quite possibly given us the performance of the night. Lets hope for the sake of competition you do not ever drop that nervousness.