Be careful what you wish for...

[Farael]

I wish that orcs were employed as security guards at "Arda Airlines"

Be careful with what you say because I saw Melkor around here and.... oh, no... it's too late now!

And so it was that Morgoth had his newest idea. Not only he created airports, but also delayed flights, cheap seats in which you cannot sleep and turbulences. Yet the final touch was still missing. When the free people of the Middle Earth were already getting used to the inconveniences of flight, Morgoth unveiled his latest evil. Orkish security guards! Relentless and naturaly violent, orks were just about the perfect match for the job. They enjoyed displeasing passangers in any way possible, whether that may be checking their bags.... or the dreaded cavity search (and I'm not talking about people's teeth)

I wish Feanor had named Melkor with a more cheerful name... something like "butterfly"

[Ordimor]

Originally Posted by Farael

I wish Feanor had named Melkor with a more cheerful name... something like "butterfly"

When this wish hits 88 mph, you're going to see some serious ...... woooosh .... GRANTED!


When the first dark lord, Melkor, slew Finwe and took the Silmarils, Feanor petitioned the Valar to make war. The Valar would not allow this and refused to budge from there position. Feanor then "challenged" the Valar to a contest. If he should win, then the Valar would not stop him and his followers in pursuit. If he lost, then it was over. Morgoth - as Feanor now called Melkor - was his blood enemy and he must have his revenge!

The contest was one never heard of before. Feanor would go head - to - head against any one Valar of their choosing, but they must choose before hearing what the contest was. They choose Tulkas. For the contest, the combatants would have to sit across from each other and make no emotional gestures. If you did, you lost. During this time they were allowed to say anything they wanted.

Tulkas was allowed to go first. He questioned Feanor about his family. He asked if his people were so great, then why weren't they able to drive Morgoth back as he did. Feanor was ready to bust inside but remained poised in appearance. He answered that all things happen for some reason.

Now it was Feanor's turn. He first glared intently at Tulkas, and then whispered into his ear.
Do you know what I think of Morgoth? Feanor asked.
No Tulkas replied.
Butterfly!

Tulkas laughed!!!

Feanor won and was allowed to pursue Morgoth.

His little name for Morgoth would always be his and Tulkas' little joke.


I wish that the Entwives would have been at the battle of Isengard.

[Gil-Galad]

Originally Posted by Ordimor

I wish that the Entwives would have been at the battle of Isengard.

Your wish is granted, but alas, the Entwives mocked how the Ents did the battle and they loss, and Saruman regained power and destroyed Rohan



I wish that The Evil Men were more victorious

[Farael]

Originally Posted by Gil-Galad

I wish that The Evil Men were more victorious

This time I shall grant your wish myself.
When the soon to be King Eleassar approached the fleet of Evil Men that was heading to Minas Ithil thorugh the river, followed by the army of the dead he was surprised to find that all the Evil Men had bought replicas of his sword on E-Bay. Using such powerful swords they were not afraid of the army of the dead nor the now-never-to-be-king Eleassar and defeated them. Later they reached Minas Ithil and destroyed it to the last hut.

I wish Theoden had survived the battle and lived a long and prosperous life

[Ordimor]

Originally Posted by Farael

I wish Theoden had survived the battle and lived a long and prosperous life

<<< It is done! >>>

In the Druadan Forest, Ghan-Buri-Ghan reveals the great secret of the Woses to Theoden: the Adamantium Fern. Found growing on ancient stone statues and woven into cloth, the material is similar to mithril - except it's pink.

The crafty Theoden trades some shiny beads for a set of Adamantium Fern underwear.

During the battle of the Pelennor Fields, the Witch-king of Angmar assails Theoden. His steed, Snowmane, rears and is struck by a dart. Snowmane falls to the ground, crushing Theoden underneath him. With the weight of his now dead horse holding him down, it would take quick thinking or great chance to survive.

Possessing both qualities enables Theoden to wield Herugrim and slay the Fell-beast and buck its master when it, carelessly believing that Theoden was fatally crushed, moves in for the final kill. In happy disbelief, Eowyn and Merry realize that the King is not dead and help him out from under his steed.

By now, the Witch-king has regained himself and moved in to attack. Theoden holds his ground in defiance which surprises the Lord of the Nazgul. His blows bounce off the wily King as if they're whispers. The Witch-king then pronounces to the Lord of the Mark that no Man may kill him.

Theoden then announces that he is no man. With this he uncloaks to reveal his underwear and proclaims that "I am no man, I am a fancy lad!" With this, the Witch-kings head explodes and is completely vanquished.

After this battle concludes and Sauron is defeated at the Battle of the Morannon, Theoden abdicates his throne to Eomer. He then turns his talents to his newest passion - lavish theatrical productions. With his signature pink overtones, Theoden becomes the embodiment of a kinder, gentler Middle Earth.

[Ordimor]

OOPs, forgot to make a wish.

I wish that Aragorn would wash his hair. I mean c'mon now - this whole slogan of his "I wash it once a year if it needs it or not" is way not cool

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Originally Posted by Ordimor

I wish that Aragorn would wash his hair. I mean c'mon now - this whole slogan of his "I wash it once a year if it needs it or not" is way not cool

Granted. But as he washes his hair it all falls out and he becomes bald. No one recognises him and Arwen runs away from him. In despair he throws himself off a cliff and so no longer helps Middle Earth to overthrow Middle Earth. Sorry folks.

I wish Radagast had helped the Fellowship more.

[The Elf-warrior]

I wish Tulkas would have come and challenged Morgoth to single combat so Fingolfin wouldn't have to die.

Your wish is granted. But Tulkas fought without a sword and was sliced and diced by Morgoth. The Valar were enraged and did the War of Wrath years early. Earendil never became a star and so Galadriel gave Frodo a flashlight which didn't stop Shelob from eating Frodo and Sam. Gollum only had his Precious a few days before a Ringwraith found him.

I wish Gollum had repented and confessed that he was leading the Hobbits into a trap.

Note: Ralph Bakshi is a director of mostly animated films. He made an animated version of Lord of the Rings which was supposed to be in two parts but the second part was never made. link

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Originally Posted by The Elf-warrior

I wish Gollum had repented and confessed that he was leading the Hobbits into a trap.

Granted. However, The Hobbits feel so happy for Gollum that they throw him a party in the middle of Mordor and Sam invites some Orcs that were passing. They are soon captured and thrown in prison with the ring taken off them. Frodo goes mad and kills Sam and Gollum, then himself. Sauron takes over Middle Earth and everyone is enslaved. Even Gandalf, who has his cloak glued to his skin.

I wish that Helm's Deep had not had a hole blown in it.