Aredhel the bad girl?

[Lush]

Alright, the main point that my friend was making is that Aredhel differs from other female characters in Tolkien's works, because she acts upon her feelings of boredom and restlessness. He believes this is inexcusable, especially for a woman. Women, "by nature", should not be restless, apparently. Wandering is traditionally a man's occupation, no?
When I brought up the issue of Éowyn, a woman in similar circumstances, I was told that Éowyn did what she did because her people were involved in a war. Aredhel, on the other hand, is a villian because she chose to do her own thing just because she "felt like it."
She was just, inexplicably, "wearied" of her life. Is a woman's weariness and dissatisfaction something that Tolkein despised? My friend seems to think so, and he points out the mother of Fëanor in backing himself up. Had she, he argues, tried to stick around for the sake of her only son, mayhap he would not have grown up to be such a prat. What do you make of that?
Maybe I'm making a big deal out of nothing, but our conversation left me steamed.