Middle-earth Therapy Sessions

[Sindafalathiel]

In a small room down the hall Reania, an intern therapist sits reading in an armchair.
In walks Legolas Greenleaf, looking rather stressed.
Reania(R)*looks up* How may I help you?
Legolas(L)I need to see a therapist.
R: Have a seat, and relax. I'll be with you in a moment.
1 minute later
R: So, what's the problem, Mr...uh...
L:Greenleaf. I'm being chased by thousands of teenagers.
R: oh?
L: All female.
R:*cringes* fangirls?
L: yes. how do I get rid of them?
R: ummmmm...shoot one with a bow and arrow?
L: Do you really think that would work?
*Banging is heard on the door*
R: get down behind the desk.
L: *hides*
R: *walks to the door, opens it, and is mobbed by thousands of rabid screaming fangirls* HEY! SETTLE DOWN!! Do you ALL need therapy?
FGs: WE WANT LEGOLAS! WE WANT LEGOLAS!
R: I'm afraid he's not here. now please, there are atients here. we do not want to disturb them.
FGs: WE WANT LEGOLAS! WE WANT LEGOLAS! *stampede over R and into the room. How they can all fit in is a mystery. L is heard begging for mercy*
FGs: *All try to make out with L*
R: GO AWAY! ALL OF YOU!
FGs: NO! WE WANT LEGOLAS!
R: *Makes way over to desk and picks up a phone and dials a number* Security to room 1313, Security to room 1313