I'd pay to see Dane Cook as the minstrel of Gondor.
"HELLOOOO, FIELD OF CORMALLEN! This is my show, I'm on the drum in the deep! I'm on the drum! By a round of applause, how do you feel? Huh? So, how about this Frodo dude, huh? He got a Ring of power...man, I want a Ring of power! I want that! I'd put it on and be all invisible, and spy out all the la-dies, ya know, and I'd sneak up behind people and PWAM! *throws himself across the stage* And I'd walkaround going "Preciousssssssssssssssssss!! Precioussssssssss!" Yeah, I want a Ring of power! GANDALF, GIMMIE YOUR RING!" *He snatches it from Gandalf, rips his shirt off and runs screaming off the stage*
That would be hilarious.
Tom Hanks as Saruman
Jim Carrey as the Mouth of Sauron
Brad Pitt as Denethor
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door
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