SAURON: I'm tired of all these depressing shades of black. From now on everything will be pink and fluffy. Oh, and you can forget that ring. What do I care about a ring, anyway?
UNGOLIANT: No thanks, I'm not hungry right now.
TOM BOMBADIL: (anything coherent and intelligent about his true nature)
RANDOM ORC #678: Where's the shampoo? My hair's filthy!
FARAMIR: The ring will go to Gondor.