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Old 08-21-2002, 06:53 PM   #41
Ithaeliel
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Silmaril

He wood chuck, he wood, as much as he cod if a would chuck cod chuck would.
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Old 10-01-2002, 03:45 PM   #42
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

Here's a nice one:

reading allowed (instead of aloud)

Aren't we glad that it is permitted?! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 10-26-2002, 11:07 AM   #43
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Sting

The following is a real find, since it manages to combine two instances of homophone abuse with the dreaded (sp?):

Quote:
at least strong enough to be able to hue (sp? not the colour) with an single Axe swipe (if your strong and skilled enough).
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Old 10-28-2002, 09:41 AM   #44
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Silmaril

This, too; three (mis-spelled) homophones in only half a sentence.

Quote:
As for whither or not Tolkien would have compleated writting about the End
[ October 28, 2002: Message edited by: Childlike Empress ]
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Old 11-10-2002, 05:23 AM   #45
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The Eye

Quote:
They where one's great King's of men
Misused homophones combined with a misquote.

[ November 10, 2002: Message edited by: Susan Delgado ]
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Old 12-16-2002, 01:51 PM   #46
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

Here's a lovely example:
Quote:
The film is great but it pails beside the book.
Must be the book in which...
Quote:
Saruman becomes impailed
Or am I just inclined to
Quote:
knitpick
???
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 12-30-2002, 02:56 PM   #47
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

We now know that the black robes were not dirty - their owners, the "wringwraiths", must have washed them!
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 01-03-2003, 08:41 AM   #48
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Sting

Quote:
I hope this sight is worth my time
I hope it is too.
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Old 01-10-2003, 03:03 AM   #49
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1420!

More of a homage than a gripe...
Quote:
burrahobbit! your back.
In the context of the thread it was hard to work out what this meant! I thought it was like "LOOK OUT!!! Behind you!" (I honestly did - oops!), and it wasn't til later I guessed that maybe Burrahobbit had taken a short leave of absence. Maybe to go and have something to do with a Troll's pocket.
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Old 01-11-2003, 03:53 AM   #50
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Silmaril

On a very old thread, I found this:

Quote:
He reached into his cloak and pulled out a small vile
A small vile what, I wonder? Chipmunk?

[img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

--Belin Ibaimendi

[ January 11, 2003: Message edited by: Belin ]
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Old 01-12-2003, 11:55 AM   #51
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The Eye

How about the 'Naz-Ghouls'?

Quote:
"Gandalf, they're in the Shire, their in the Shire!" Pippin ran out of
the direction of the Shire.
Owwwww.

[ January 12, 2003: Message edited by: Rosseiliantiel ]
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Old 01-20-2003, 02:19 AM   #52
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Shield

I swore on my pet elephant's grave that this doozie would not go unnoticed. From an RPG discussion thread:
Quote:
Hey again. Glad to be excepted!
Okay, fine, be that way - we didn't want you anyway! Rest in peace, Tibor...
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Old 01-21-2003, 09:02 PM   #53
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Silmaril

Man, this topic rocked... glad to see it back.

Here's a good won (misuse intended):

Do you think Lord of the Rings should have one a Golden Globe?

Um, but aren't ONE and A synonymous...? [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 01-23-2003, 03:20 AM   #54
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The Eye

Couldn't let this pass:

Quote:
Only some of the Nandor went to Eriador, lead by Denethor, most then excavated to Beleriand
I suppose they could have done excavations, but I really thought that was more the Dwarves' mileu.

[ January 23, 2003: Message edited by: Susan Delgado ]
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Old 01-24-2003, 04:44 AM   #55
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Sting

Quote:
If Hobbits eat so much and where so portly why wheren't there ever any hart attacts there?
Possibly because harts are herbivores and hobbits are too portly to chase them.
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Old 01-25-2003, 08:00 AM   #56
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Pipe

Excerpt from recent chat-log, #BD:

___________

* Din****er fined pickle on floor...eats it anyway
Ga*******n> DF!
Din*****er> *fines

___________

An intriguing economic model.

[ January 25, 2003: Message edited by: Rimbaud ]
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Old 01-27-2003, 11:56 PM   #57
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

...agreeing with a favorite character/creature:
Quote:
I conquer with the Gollum vote
I guess Gollum came, saw and concurred! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 01-28-2003, 01:42 AM   #58
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The Eye

From an RPG in which the character is a Blacksmith:
Quote:
The blade hardly needed sharpening, but Jadae had had no other costumers that day, so it didn't matter.
Must have been dramatacists' off-season, that the poor costumers have to work in a smithy.
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Old 01-28-2003, 09:45 PM   #59
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Pipe

Apologies to the author of the very fine post from which this came, but I couldn't resist it:

Quote:
due to Tolkien’s dislike of allergy
He was a martyr to hayfever ... [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 01-30-2003, 10:13 PM   #60
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Sting

Quote:
Faramir was a mayor dissapointment
True, true, I guess he'd never get elected Mayor of Hobbiton with the way he behaved in the movie...
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Old 02-06-2003, 07:24 AM   #61
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

I'm puzzled over
Quote:
dyehard fans
Just what is it that changes colour with such difficulty??
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 02-06-2003, 07:55 AM   #62
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Sting

A colour-blind chamaeleon?
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Old 02-09-2003, 08:10 PM   #63
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Oooh, a fresh typo (with the utmost respect to the author, who is probably editing it out as I speak):

Quote:
(insert wretching sound here).
I wonder how exactly one "wretchs" and what it sounds like...
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Old 02-11-2003, 03:51 PM   #64
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

The literacy of the LotR experts:
Quote:
Tolkien scholars going on about how they are always write
Mental undressing??
Quote:
Bare in mind
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 02-16-2003, 04:08 PM   #65
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Sting

I think that this is the most unfortunate misuse of a homophone to date:
Quote:
LOTR was also a grate book
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Old 02-17-2003, 01:06 PM   #66
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Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.
Boots

The Downs takes a washing on this one:

Quote:
In the first book, I didn't get exactly what the Barrow Whites were, can someone explain what they are?
Tide? Blue Cheer? Javex?

Bethberry
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Old 02-17-2003, 09:37 PM   #67
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Sting

<Annundalia> Me and my friend were balling when we found out.


I was bawling too.
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Old 02-18-2003, 06:47 AM   #68
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Sting

Quote:
I didn't get exactly what the Barrow Whites were
I would suggest that they are what Ron washes when he's finished his darks.
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Old 02-21-2003, 11:01 PM   #69
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Sting

Quote:
I hope that didn't boar anyone to death.
What a gruesome way to die.
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Old 02-24-2003, 02:55 PM   #70
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Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.
Boots

From a discussion on BarrowDowns' chat site:

Quote:
dont worry, my problem is grammer, though, my teacher thinks im wonderful at wrighting storys.
Bb
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Old 02-27-2003, 05:07 PM   #71
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Something I found on the Chat:
Quote:
It is impossible to pay to much attention to a movie, Alka
The person apparently doesn't know about "to", "too", and "two". I'll assume it was a typographical error (however, he didn't correct himself at all). [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 03-02-2003, 07:36 AM   #72
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

Quote:
...riot's might brake out.
Where are the brakes located on riots? That would be a very good thing to know!
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 03-05-2003, 07:32 PM   #73
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The Saucepan Man has been trapped in the Barrow!
Pipe

Quote:
Tolkien lived through the rain of Queen Elizabeth
Can't say that surprises me. After all, we do have rather a lot of precipitation in Britain. [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]

[ March 05, 2003: Message edited by: The Saucepan Man ]
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Old 03-07-2003, 02:55 PM   #74
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

Quote:
In the Silm it says Melkor bread the dragons.
Do you fry or bake breaded dragons?? And "is it tasty? Is it crunchable?"

[ March 07, 2003: Message edited by: Estelyn Telcontar ]
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 03-10-2003, 03:20 AM   #75
Estelyn Telcontar
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Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!Estelyn Telcontar has reached the Cracks of Doom and destroyed the Ring!
Silmaril

Quote:
Which King
Is the Which a witch??
Quote:
The Wight Rider
Since when does B-W have a horse??

[ March 10, 2003: Message edited by: Estelyn Telcontar ]
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'
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Old 03-10-2003, 12:05 PM   #76
Hilde Bracegirdle
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Quote:
As a bonus I have learned to use the dicitioonairy and can now type up to 20 wpm...
I don't mean to be mean adding this in here, but it made me smile! Would you say that he/she needs a dictionary or to type slower?

Actually, I need the dictionary as it's not a homophone!

[ March 10, 2003: Message edited by: Hilde Bracegirdle ]
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Old 03-12-2003, 08:34 PM   #77
Ithaeliel
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The Eldar weeded for the most part in their youth and soon after their fiftieth year
Ah, the joys of gardening when you're young and hale... I wonder what became of their flowers after the elves hit fifty?
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Old 03-17-2003, 03:17 PM   #78
Galadrie1
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A thousand apologies to the person who posted this, but I just couldn't resist.
Quote:
the Barrow-Weight
Just how much does a Barrow weigh? Would you include everything inside it in the weight?
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Old 03-21-2003, 08:30 PM   #79
The Saucepan Man
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Quote:
Shire- The rolling hills of Whales
Presumably that'll be Humpback Whales. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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Old 03-21-2003, 09:08 PM   #80
Sophia the Thunder Mistress
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Many many apologies to the person who wrote this, but I thought of this thread the minute I saw it and laughed for ages...
Quote:
The rolling planes
Like airliners? or fighter jets maybe?

Another winner is when you run a couple of words together...

Quote:
hob*****aracter
[ March 21, 2003: Message edited by: Sophia the Thunder Mistress ]
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