Thread: Akallabêth
View Single Post
Old 06-08-2018, 05:01 AM   #1
King's Writer
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,589
Findegil is a guest of Tom Bombadil.

This is the first draft of the chapter Akallabêth in the part The Black Years.

The is no Basic Text in this chapter is of course from the Akallabêth out of the Sil77, nonetheless and I will give source information for each part that is used. There are big parts used from The Lost Road in HoMe 5.

The markings are:
BY-HL-zz for Black Years, Head-Lines, marking all headlines for the chapters in this part.

AK-SL-zz for AKallabêth, Story-Line, to document all changes that construct the main text.

AK-HA-zz for AKallabêth, History of the Akallabêth, to document all reconstruction to the original text. I will normally not comment on these.

Some conventions of my writing:
Normal Text is from the text that is mentioned in the source information of each insert.
Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalised text, normally only used for general changes
<source example> = additions with source information
example = text inserted for grammatical or metrical reason
/example/ = outline expansion
Normally if an inserted text includes the beginning of a new § these is indicated by a missing “>” at the end of the § and a missing “<” at the beginning of the next.
BY-HL-16<Akallabêth Akallabêth
> AK-SL-01<Akallabêth In this Age, as is elsewhere told, … nor did he forget the aid that Tar-Minastir had rendered to Gil-galad of old AK-HA-01 , in that time when the One Ring was forged and there was war between Sauron and the Elves in Eriador. … and he withdrew from the coasts.
Yet Sauron was ever guileful, … he began to assail the strong places of the Númenóreans upon the shores of the sea AK-HA-02 <History of the Akalabeth but Umbar he could not yet take>.
In those days the Shadow grew deeper upon Númenor; … And the AK-HA-03 {nineteenth}<History of the Akalabeth twentieth> king took the sceptre of his fathers,… But worse was yet to come. For Ar-Gimilzôr the AK-HA-04 {twenty-second}<History of the Akalabeth twenty-third> king was the greatest enemy of the Faithful. … that still came secretly to the west-shores of the land.
Now the Elendili dwelt mostly in the western regions of Númenor; … and the havens of Andúnië were forlorn.
Highest in honour after the house of the kings were the Lords of Andúnië; for they were of the line of ElrosAK-HA-05<History of the Akalabeth [Footnote to the text: And they took names in Quenya,as did no other house save the kings.]>, being descended from Silmarien, daughter of Tar-Elendil the fourth king of NúmenorAK-HA-06 <History of the Akalabeth [Footnote to the text: And in their line the sceptre would indeed have descended had the law been in his day as it was later made. For when Tar-{Ankalime}[Ancalime] became the first ruling Queen, being the only child of Tar-Aldarion the Sixth King, the law was made that the oldest child of the King whether man or woman should receive the sceptre and the kingly authority; but Silmarien was older than her brother Meneldur who succeeded Tar-Elendil.]>. And these lords were loyal to the kings, … and sought rather to amend the hearts of the lords of the Sceptre with wiser counsels.
There was a lady Inzilbêth, … if the laws had allowed.
But when Inziladûn acceded to the sceptre, … and Avallónë was veiled in cloud.
AK-SL-02<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text c For Pharazôn son of Gimilkhâd had become even more restless and eager for wealth and power than his father. He was a man of great beauty and stature, in likness of the first kings of men, and indeed in his youth he was not unlike the Edain of old in mind also, though he had courage and strength of will rather than of wisdom, as after appeared, when he was corrupted by the counsels of his father and the acclaim of the people. In his earlier days he had a close friendship with Amandil son of Númendil, Lord of Andúnië, AK-SL-03<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text a [Footnote to the text: {3rd}[2nd] in line from Eärendur and {18th}[17th] from Valandil the First Lord of Andúnië.]> and he had loved the people of that House, with whom he himself had kinship (through Inzilbêth his father's mother). With them he was often a guest, and there also his cousin, daughter of Inziladûn, was often be found. For Elentir Amandil’s brother loved her, and she had turned her heart to him, and it was known that soon they would be betrothed. AK-SL-04<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text b Now {Zimrahil}[Zimraphel], whom her father called Míriel, only daughter of Tar-Palantir, was a woman of great beauty, smaller {[?}in {... }stature{]} than were most women of that land, with bright eyes{, and she had great skill in ..}. She was older than Ar-Pharazôn by one year,{(17)} but seemed younger, and his eyes and heart were turned to her; but the laws of Númenor lay between, beside the displeasure of her father whom Gimilkhâd opposed in all ways that he could. For in Númenor cousins in the first degree did not marry even in the royal house. And moreover Zimrahil was betrothed to Elentir Amandil's {[?}older{]} brother and heir of Numendil.{(18)}
From a distance,{(19)} for Gimilkhâd and his son were not welcome in the house of the king.{
In the remainder of the text there are a number of whole sentences, clearly essential to the briefly sketched narrative, in which I can decipher virtually nothing.
Now it came into his heart that he would ..........} Pharazôn was not disposed to admit hindrance to his desires, and he asked leave therefore of Amandil to be a guest in his house, learning {.....}that Zimrahil was at the time in Andúnië. Gimilkhad was little pleased with this, for the Lords of Andúnië were his chief opponents. But Pharazôn {[?}laughed{]} saying he would do as he would{, and .........}.
And Amandil and Pharazôn rode in Andúnië and Elentir and {Zimrahil}[Zimraphel] saw them afar as they {[?}stood{] .....} for Elentir loved his brother. But when {Zimrahil}[Zimraphel] saw Pharazôn in the splendour of his young manhood come riding {[? }in{] .......... Suddenly}suddenly {Zimrahil}[Zimraphel]'s heart turned towards him. And when Pharazôn was greeted upon the steps of the house their eyes met {.......... }and they were abashed.>AK-SL-05<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text a but when first she saw Pharazôn her eyes and her heart were turned to him, for his beauty, and for his wealth also.{
}But he went away{(15)} and she remained unwed.>
Now Gimilkhâd died two years before his two hundredth year (which was accounted an early death for one of Elros' line even in its waning), but this brought no peace to the King. For Pharazôn son of Gimilkhâd had become a man yet more restless and eager for wealth and power than his father. He had fared often abroad, as a leader in the wars that the Númenóreans made then in the coastlands of Middle-earth, seeking to extend their dominion over Men; and thus he had won great renown as a captain both by land and by sea. Therefore when he came back to Númenor, hearing of his father's death, the hearts of the people were turned to him; for he brought with him great wealth, and was for the time free in his giving.
AK-SL-06 {And it came to pass that Tar-Palantir grew weary of grief and died. He had no son, but a daughter only, whom he named Míriel in the Elven-tongue; and to her now by right and the laws of the Númenóreans came the sceptre. But Pharazôn took her to wife against her will, doing evil in this and evil also in that the laws of Númenor did not permit the marriage, even in the royal house, of those more nearly akin than cousins in the second degree. And when they were wedded, he seized the sceptre into his own hand, taking the title of Ar-Pharazôn (Tar-Calion in the Elven-tongue); and the name of his queen he changed to Ar-Zimraphel.}<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text a And now it came to pass that {her}Zimraphel’s father Tar-Palantir grew weary of grief and died, and as he had no son the sceptre came to her, in the name of Tar-Míriel, by right and the laws of the Númenóreans. But Pharazôn {[?}arose{]} and came to her, and she was glad, and forsook the allegiance of her father for the time, being enamoured of Pharazôn. And in this they broke the laws of Númenor that forbade marriage even in the royal house between those more nearly akin than cousins in the second degree. But they were too powerful for any to gainsay them. And when they were wedded she yielded the sceptre to Pharazôn, and he sat upon the throne of Elros in the name of Ar-Pharazôn the Golden, but she retained also her title as hers by right, and was called Ar-{Zimrahil}[Zimraphel].{(16)}
The Elendili alone were not subservient to him, or dared to speak against his wishes, and it became well-known to all in that time that Amandil the Lord of Andúnië was head of their party though not openly declared.> AK-SL-07<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text d And {he}Ar-Pharazôn persecuted the Faithful, and deprived the Lords of Andúnië of their lordship, since they had aided Tar-Palantir and supported his daughter. Andúnië he took then and made it the chief harbour of the king's ships, and Amandil the Lord he commanded to dwell in Rómenna. Yet he did not otherwise molest him, nor dismiss him yet from his Council. For in the days of his youth (ere his father corrupted him) Amandil had been his dear friend.>

The mightiest and proudest was Ar-Pharazôn the Golden of all those that had wielded the Sceptre of the Sea-Kings since the foundation of Númenor; and AK-HA-07{three}<History of the Akalabeth four> and twenty Kings and Queens had ruled the Númenóreans before, and slept now in their deep tombs under the mount of Meneltarma, lying upon beds of gold.
And sitting upon his carven throne in the city of Armenelos in the glory of his power, AK-SL-08<HoME 12; The History of the Akallabêth; Note on the marriage of Míriel and Pharazôns; text a and he found it too little to appease his {[?}lust{]}, and amid all his splendour > he brooded darkly, thinking of war. … if that might be.
Great was the anger of Ar-Pharazôn at these tidings, … and when all was made ready he himself set sail with his host into the East.
And men saw his sails coming up out of the sunset, dyed as with scarlet and gleaming with red AK-HA-08 { and} gold, and fear fell upon the dwellers by the coasts, and they fled far away. But the fleet came at last to that place that was called Umbar, where was AK-HA-09 the mighty haven of the Númenóreans that no hand had wrought. … swear to him fealty.
And Sauron came. … for all that he said seemed fair and wise.
But Ar-Pharazôn was not yet deceived, … but his heart within was filled the more with envy and hate.
Yet such was the cunning of his mind and mouth, … so that the increase of their power shall find no end.'
And Ar-Pharazôn said: 'Who is the Lord of the Darkness?'
Then behind locked doors Sauron spoke … and he shall make you stronger than they.'
Then Ar-Pharazôn the King turned back to the worship of the Dark, … and neither the King nor Sauron dared to lay hands on him as yet.
Therefore Amandil withdrew to Rómenna, … for it was a memorial of the Eldar and of the light of Valinor.
At the first the King would not assent to this, … arose and was troubled no more by his wounds.
None too soon was this done; … until slowly it passed into the west.
Thereafter the fire and smoke went up without ceasing; … and hate brings forth hate.
But for all this Death did not depart from the land, … and the men of power took cruel revenge.
Nonetheless for long it seemed to the Númenóreans that they prospered, … and the memory of the kindly kings of the AK-HA-10{ancient}<History of the Akalabeth elder> days faded from the world and was darkened by many a tale of dread.
Thus Ar-Pharazôn, … and be subject to no command or ban.
And he said: 'The Valar have possessed … and take what is their due.'
Then Ar-Pharazôn, being besotted, and walking under the shadow of death, … Therefore he called his son, Elendil, and he said to him:
'The days are dark, and there is no hope AK-HA-11{for}<History of the Akalabeth in> Men, for the Faithful are few. … and beseech his aid ere all is lost.'
'Would you then betray the King? … and that until this day it has been false.'
'If I thought that Manwë needed such a messenger, … lest all my people should become guilty.'
'But what think you, … when your deed becomes known?'
'It must not become known, … But for AK-HA-12{you}[thou] and {your}[thy] folk, my son, I counsel that you should prepare yourselves other ships, and put aboard all such things as your hearts cannot bear to part with; and when the ships are ready, {you}[thou] should lie in the haven of Rómenna, and give out among men that {you}[thou] purpose, when {you see your}[thou seeth thy] time, to follow me into the east. Amandil is no longer so dear to our kinsman upon the throne that he will grieve over much, if we seek to depart, for a season or for good. But let it not be seen that {you}[thou] intend to take many men, or he will be troubled, because of the war that he now plots, for which he will need all the force that he may gather. Seek out the Faithful that are known still to be true, and let them join {you}[thy] in secret, if they are willing to go with {you}[thy], and share in {your}[thy] design.'
'And what shall that design be?' said Elendil.
'To meddle not in the war, … But east or west the Valar alone can say.'
Then Amandil said farewell … for the end of the world that we have known is now at hand.'
It is said that Amandil set sail in a small ship … and for the treason of Númenor there was no easy absolving.
But Elendil did all that his father had bidden, … Then he journeyed in secret to the western shores and gazed out over the sea, for sorrow and yearning were upon him, and he greatly loved his father. But naught could he descry save the fleets of Ar-Pharazôn gathering in the havens of the west.>AK-SL-09<HoME 5; The Lsot Road BY-HL-17{Chapter III}<editiroal emendation
* * *
>{Elendil}[Isildur] was walking in his garden, but not to look upon its beauty in the evening light. He was troubled and his mind was turned inward. His house with its white tower and golden roof glowed behind him in the sunset, but his eyes were on the path before his feet. He was going down to the shore, to bathe in the blue pools of the cove beyond his garden's end, as was his custom at this hour. And he looked also to find his son {Herendil}[Elendur] there. The time had come when he must speak to him.
He came at length to the great hedge of lavaralda{(1)} that fenced the garden at its lower, western, end. It was a familiar sight, though the years could not dim its beauty. It was seven twelves of years{(2)} or more since he had planted it himself when planning his garden before his marriage; … but a new disquiet.
'Eressëa, Eressëa!' he said. 'I wish I were there; and had not been fated to dwell in Númenor{(3)} half-way between the worlds. And least of all in these days of perplexity!'
He passed under an arch of shining leaves, … and the beach seemed oddly empty.
{Elendil}[Isildur] stood and surveyed the cove … He could not interpret the feeling.
He sighed. … The time is getting short.'

'{Herendil}[Elendur]!' he called, and his voice echoed along the hollow shore above the soft sound of the light-falling waves. '{Herendil}[Elendur]!'

{Elendil}[Isildur] sighed. 'Then it must have become perilous to be the {son}[grandson] of him that is named elendil; for that leads to {Valandil, God-friend,}[Amandil, friend of Aman] who was thy {father}[grandfather]'s father AK-SL-10<editorial addition and at last to Valandil, friend of the Valar, who was the first Lord of Andúnië>.'{(6)}
There was a silence. …

'Yea, so I have heard others say, … Thou art my AK-SL-11{only}[eldest] son, and my dearest child, and I would have us at one in all our choices. …

'I bring no evil, … Thou art AK-SL-12{but four}[less then two] twelves,{(10)} and wert AK-SL-13{but a small child}[not yet born] when Sauron came. Thou dost not understand what days were like before then. …

Now her voice sang an even-song in the Eressëan tongue, but made by men, long ago. The nightingale ceased. {Elendil}[Isildur] stood still to listen; and the words came to him, far off and strange, as some melody in archaic speech sung sadly in a forgotten twilight in the beginning of man's journey in the world.

Illu Ilúvatar en káre eldain a fírimoin
ar antaróta mannar Valion: númessier.....

The Father made the World for elves and mortals, and he gave it into the hands of the Lords, who are in the West.

So sang Fíriel on high, until her voice fell sadly to the question with which that song ends: man táre antáva nin Ilúvatar, Ilúvatar, enyáre tar i tyel íre Anarinya qeluva? What will Ilúvatar, O Ilúvatar, give me in that day beyond the end, when my Sun faileth?'[Footnote to the text: AK-SL-14{The manuscript (followed by the typescript) is here confused, since in addition to the text as printed the whole song that Fíriel sang is given as well, with translation; thus the two opening and the two closing lines and their translations are repeated. It is clear however from pencilled markings on the manuscript that my father moved at once to a second version (omitting the greater part of the song) without striking out the first.
The text of the song was emended in three stages. Changes made probably very near the time of writing were Valion númenyaron (translated 'of the Lords of the West') > Valion: númessier in line 2, and hondo-ninya > indo-ninya in line 9; Vinya was written above Númenor as an alternative in line 8 (cf. note 3). Before the later emendations the text ran thus:
}Ilu Ilúvatar en káre eldain a fírimoin
ar antaróta mannar Valion: númessier.
Toi aina, mána, meldielto - enga morion:
talantie. [Alkar ]Mardello{ Melko} lende: márie.
{Eldain en kárier Isil, nan hildin Úr-anar.}[En kárielto eldain Isil, hildin Úr-anar.]
{Toi írimar. Ilqainen antar annar lestanen}[Toi írimar. Ilyain antalto annar lestanen]
Ilúvatáren. Ilu vanya, fanya, eari,
i-mar, ar ilqa ímen. Írima ye Númenor.
Nan úye sére indo-ninya símen, ullume;
ten sí ye tyelma, yéva tyel ar i-narqelion,
írẹ ilqa yéva nótina, hostainiéva, yallume:
ananta úva táre fárea, ufárea!
Man táre antáva nin Ilúvatar, Ilúvatar
enyárẹ tar i tyel, íre Anarinya qeluva?

The Father made the World for Elves and Mortals, and he gave it into the hands of the Lords. They are in the West. They are holy, blessed, and beloved: save the dark one. He is fallen. {Melko}[Alkar] has gone from Earth: it is good. For Elves they made the Moon, but for Men the red Sun; which are beautiful. To all they gave in measure the gifts of Ilúvatar. The World is fair, the sky, the seas, the earth, and all that is in them. Lovely is Númenor. But my heart resteth not here for ever; for here is ending, and there will be an end and the Fading, when all is counted, and all numbered at last, but yet it will not be enough, not enough. What will the Father, O Father, give me in that day beyond the end when my Sun faileth?{
Subsequently Mardello Melko in line 4 was changed to Melko Mardello, and lines 5-6 became
En kárielto eldain Isil, hildin Úr-anar.
Toi írimar. Ilyain antalto annar lestanen
Then, after the typescript was made, Melko was changed to Alkar in text and translation; see note 15.
The thought of lines 5 - 6 of the song reappears in Elendil's words to Herendil later (p. 64): 'But the Valar made the Moon for the Firstborn and the Sun for Men to confound the Darkness of the Enemy.' Cf. QS §75 (The Silmarillion p. 99): 'For the Sun was set as a sign for the awakening of Men and the waning of the Elves; but the Moon cherishes their memory.'}] 'E man antavaro? What will he give indeed?' said {Elendil}[Isildur]; and stood in sombre thought.
'She should not sing that song out of a window, … and the king shall give us the Sun forever.'
'I know what they say, … followed him. BY-HL-18{Chapter IV}<editiroal emendation
* * *
> {Herendil}[Elendur] lay on the floor, …

'{Eärendel}[Eärendil] was son of Tuor, son of Huor, son of {Gumlin}[Galdor], … And he renounced there all whom he loved, his wife and his AK-SL-15{child}[children], and all his kindred, …

'But why should we not essay it? The Eressëans go thitherAK-SL-16{, and yet our mariners in the old days used to sojourn in Eressëa without hurt}.'
'The Eressëans are not as we. … as the pictures of friends beloved.
'There were no temples in this land. … but at these we laughed.{(21)}
'It seems that rumour came also to him of us. It is not many years – AK-SL-17{three twelves and eight(22)}[less then five twelves] - but it seems many, since he came hither. Thou wert AK-SL-18{a small child}[not yet born], and knew not {then }what was happening in the east of this land, far from our western house. {Tarkalion}[Tar-Calion] the king was moved by rumours of Sauron, and AK-SL-19{sent forth}[went on] a mission to discover what truth was in the mariners' tales. Many counsellors dissuaded him. My AK-SL-20{father}[grandfather] told me, and he was one of them, that those who were wisest and had most knowledge of the West had messages from the Lords warning them to beware. For the Lords said that Sauron would work evil; but he could not come hither unless he were summoned.{(23)} {Tarkalion}[Tar-Calion] was grown proud, and brooked no power in Middle-earth greater than his own. Therefore AK-SL-21{the ships were sent}[he took ship and went forth], and Sauron was summoned to do homage.
'AK-SL-22{Guards were set at the haven of Moriondë in the east of the land,(24) where the rocks are dark, watching at the king's command without ceasing for the ships' return. It was night, but there was a bright Moon. They descried ships far off, and they seemed to be sailing west at a speed greater than the storm, though there was little wind. Suddenly the sea became unquiet; it rose until it became like a mountain, and it rolled upon the land. The ships were lifted up, and cast far inland, and lay in the fields. Upon that ship which was cast highest and stood dry upon a hill there was a man, or one in man's shape, but greater than any even of the race of Númenor in stature.
'He stood upon the rock(25) and said: "This is done as a sign of power. For I am Sauron the mighty, servant of the Strong" (wherein he spoke darkly).}[And Sauron came and said:] "I have come. Be glad, men of Númenor, for I will take thy king to be my king, and the world shall be given into his hand."
'And it seemed to men that Sauron was great; … and he was humble before {Tarkalion}[Tar-Calion].
'And behold what hath happened since, … They fret as men in chains.
'Wherefore Sauron hath preached deliverance; … Tomorrow it will be over the West.
'We had no temples. AK-SL-23<moved from below No man prayeth AK-SL-24{there. It waiteth}[here]. For long Sauron did not name his master by the name that from old is accursed here. He spoke at first of the Strong One, of the Eldest Power, of the Master. But now he speaketh openly of Alkar, of Morgoth. He hath prophesied his return. >But now the AK-SL-25{Mountain}[hill in the Kings garden in Armenelos] is despoiled. Its trees are felled, and it stands naked; and upon its summit there is a Temple. It is of marble, and of AK-SL-26{gold}[silver], and of glass and steel, and is wonderful, but terrible. AK-SL-27{No man prayeth there. }It waiteth. {For long Sauron did not name his master by the name that from old is accursed here. He spoke at first of the Strong One, of the Eldest Power, of the Master. But now he speaketh openly of Alkar,(26) of Morgoth. He hath prophesied his return.} The Temple is to be {his}Alkar’s house. Númenor is to be the seat of the world's dominion. Meanwhile Sauron dwelleth there. He surveys our land from the AK-SL-28{Mountain}[Temple], and is risen above the king, even proud {Tarkalion}[Tar-Calion], of the line chosen by the Lords, the seed of {Eärendel}[Eärendil].
'Yet Morgoth cometh not. …

'Even what I say. Why dost thou look on me so strangely? Didst thou think the AK-SL-29{son}[grandson] of {Valandil}[Amandil], chief of the wise men of Númenor, … nor to his master.'
'But thou speakest as if thou wert a leader in this matter … Even to dispraise Sauron is held rebellious.'
'I am a leader, my son. … Wilt thou stay?'
'Atarinya tye-meláne… What dost thou say?'
'I stay, father.'>BY-HL-19<editiroal addition
* * *
> Now aforetime in the isle of Númenor the weather … thunder echoed between sea and cloud.
Then men grew afraid. … but they were devised by Sauron.
Now the lightnings increased … But all the more did Ar-Pharazôn press on with his armament.
In that time the fleets of the Númenóreans darkened the sea upon the west of the land, … and men brought him victims to be burned.
Then the Eagles of the Lords of the West came up out of the dayfall, … and it seemed to them that they were red with wrath.
Then Ar-Pharazôn hardened his heart, … and in that hour the trumpets of Númenor outrang the thunder.
Thus the fleets of the Númenóreans moved against the menace of the West; … to wrest from them everlasting life within the Circles of the World.

AK-HA-13{But}<The History of the Akallabêth But who among Men{, Ælfwine,} can tell the tale of their fate? For neither ship nor man of all that host returned ever to the lands of the living; and the world was changed in that time, and in Middle-earth the memory of all that went before is dim and unsure. But among the Eldar word has been preserved of the deeds and things that were; and the wisest in lore among them tell this tale{, Ælfwine, that I tell now to thee}. And they say that> the fleets of Ar-Pharazôn came up out of the deeps of the sea and encompassed Avallónë and all the isle of Eressëa, … His heart misgave him when he looked upon the soundless shores and saw AK-HA-14{Taniquetil}<The History of the Akallabêth the Mountains of Aman> shining, whiter than snow, … whence all the Eldar had fled.
Then Manwë upon the Mountain called upon Ilúvatar, and for that time the Valar laid down their government of AK-HA-15{Arda}<The History of the Akallabêth the Earth>. But Ilúvatar showed forth his power, … and the Day of Doom.
But the land of Aman and Eressëa of the Eldar were taken away and removed AK-HA-16<The History of the Akallabêth from the circles of the world> beyond the reach of Men for ever. And Andor, the Land of Gift, Númenor of the Kings, Elenna of the Star of Eärendil, was utterly destroyed. For it was nigh to the east of the great rift, and its foundations were overturned, and it fell and went down into darkness, and is no more. And there is not now AK-HA-17{upon Earth}<The History of the Akallabêth within the circles of the world > any place abiding where the memory of a time without evil is preserved. For Ilúvatar cast back the Great Seas west of Middle-earth, and the Empty Lands east of it, and new lands and new seas were made; and the world was diminished, for Valinor and Eressëa were taken from it into the realm of hidden things.
In an hour unlocked for by Men this doom befell, … and her cry was lost in the roaring of the wind.
But whether or no it were that Amandil came indeed to Valinor … hunting the unhappy men like straws upon the water.
Nine ships there were: four for Elendil, and for Isildur three, and for Anárion two; … and hills crumbled and rivers were turned into strange courses.

Elendil and his sons after founded kingdoms in Middle-earth; … and of their strife with Sauron that not yet was ended.
For Sauron himself was filled with great fear at the wrath of the Valar, … and the Eye of Sauron the Terrible few could endure.
But these things come not into the tale of the Drowning of Númenor, … spoke of Mar-nu-Falmar that was whelmed in the waves, Akallabêth the Downfallen, Atalantë AK-HA-18<The History of the Akallabêth [Footnote to the text: The Adunaic or Númenorean name of the same meaning was Akallabêth, √KALAB. By a curious coincidence {(not consciously prepared) before this tale was written a}[u]the[/b] base √TALAT 'collapse, fall in ruin' {had already been invented, and from that base}produced atalante 'it has fallen down'{ was a correct formation} according to grammatical rules{ devised before Númenor had been thought of}. The resemblance to Atlantis is thus by chance (as we say).]> in the Eldarin tongue.
* * *
Among the Exiles many believed that the summit of the Meneltarma, … in true being and in the whole shape of the world as at first it was devised.'
For the Dúnedain held that even mortal Men, … and returned weary at last to the place of their beginning; and they said:
'All roads are now bent.'
Thus in after days, … and traversed Ilmen which flesh unaided cannot endure, until it came to Tol Eressëa, AK-HA-19{the Lonely Isle}<The History of the Akallabêth where are the Eldar immortal>, and maybe even beyond, to Valinor, where the Valar still dwell and watch the unfolding of the story of the world. And tales and rumours arose along the shores of the sea concerning mariners and men forlorn upon the water who, by some fate or grace or favour of the Valar, had entered in upon the Straight Way and seen the face of the world sink below them, and so had come to the lamplit quays of Avallónë AK-HA-20<The History of the Akallabêth and Eressëa>, or verily to the last beaches on the margin of Aman, and there had looked upon the White Mountain, dreadful and beautiful, before they died.
Some comments on my editing:

BY-HL-16: On the one hand we have reduced the contenet of this chapter by removing the earlier history of Númenor. On the other hand we extend it by The Lost Road chapters.

AK-SL-01: We start with the text were we left the Akallabêth. This is fitting since it tells of the again upcoming might of Sauron.

AK-SL-02: Even if we decised not to use the story of Elentir’s proposed marriage to Miriel, we should at least us the first part of this, as it gives a description of Pharazôns character.
The problem of the story of Elentir is that it is not fully told, but that shouldn’t hinder us to much. Missing is the death of Elentir, but that he died is clear since Amandil becomes the next Lord of Andunië following Valandil even so we are told that Elentir was the older of the brethren.
For me JRR Tolkiens decision to leave the story out, is rather a concern of space then a rejection of its content, but that is of course speculation and open for discussion.

AK-SL-03: I took these footnote from text a, since it adds information otherwise lost.

AK-SL-04: Text b is difficult, but it is need to construct the tale. I removed in this passage the editorial footnote and remarks in the text. Again Christopher Tolkiens guesses about the unreadable words is the best we have.

AK-SL-05: This passage from text a seems to say more explicit what is is only hinted at in text b. After this we come back to the basic text from the Akallabêth.

AK-SL-06: This part of the Akallabêth is replaced by the parts telling farther the story of Pharazons and Miriel from text a. The forced marriage of Miriel is the only argument against the story of Miriel/Elentir/Pharazôns. But for me that never worked well: How could even the leader of the King’s Men force the Queen into marriage?
At least the last part about the Elendili not being subservient and Amandil being know even so not declared the leader of that party should be considered, even so the story of Miriel/Elentir/Pharazôns is not taken up.

AK-SL-07: I don’t see any good reason not to take this passage from text D.

AK-SL-08: This is now really independent of the story of Miriel/Elentir/Pharazôns but adds nicely to the character description of Pharazôns.

AK-HA-12: I tried to re-establish the difference in th addressing between Amandil and Elendil, but I am fare from sure that I was succesfull.

AK-SL-09: The visit of Elendil to Andunië seems to set the stage for the talk of father and son that is told in The Lost Road. As already discussed in the thread * An unofficial New Silmarillion Outline * I think the son must be Elendur since the father fears that his son is called to the weapon taking, and only Elendur has a fiting age for this at any time in which Sauron is in Númenor as he clearly must be during the talk. So with the son fix as Elendur, we could change the older man to be the grandfather and stay with Elendil, but the father to son relation is important in this talk and so I think we have to change the father to Isildur.
I removed all editorial notes from Christopher Tolkien.

BY-HL-17, BY-HL-18: ‘Chapter III’ etc. as it was in The Lost Road is unuseable, so I replaced it with natural ‘* * *’.

AK-SL-10: I think we should keep the reference to Valandil, even so he is in or version an anjester of long, long ago.

AK-SL-11: Elendur is not the only son of Isildur, so we must change this.

AK-SL-12, AK-SL-13 & AK-SL-17, AK-SL-18: The time that has elapsed between the coming of Sauron and the talk has to be changed as well as the age in which the son was at Sauron coming (unborn in our case). As I said in the outline thread as Elendur is barely old enough we have to place the talk as late as possible. I took 3317 as a working assumption.

Orontor and his mission is so unspecific, that we do not have to change anything here. In our version he could be a companion of Amandil.

AK-SL-14: I put the complete text of the song into the footnote.

AK-SL-15: Eärendil has in our Version two sons.

AK-SL-16: The sojourn of the Númenorean mariners in Eressea has to go.

AK-SL-19: Tar-Calion in our version goes out to Middel-earth him self.

AK-SL-20, AK-SL-21: Amandil was the counsellor and since Isildur speaks it must be grandfather here.

AK-SL-22: Saurons arrival is in our version as a hostage, so this has to go.

AK-SL-23 & AK-SL-24: I used this passage to make the point that the Númenoreans had no religion.

AK-SL-25, AK-SL-28: In our Version the temple is not at the Meneltaram, but in the gardens of the King in Armenelos.

AK-SL-26: Their might have been gold used in the temple but the dome was in the later story made of silver.

AK-SL-27: Most of this was moved.

AK-SL-29: Again we have to add one generation and change Valandil to Amandil.

BY-HL-19: At this return to the text of the Akallabêth I felt a ‘headline’ necessary.

AK-HA-13: I think we can keep more of this passage.

Findegil is offline   Reply With Quote