What if's, franchises, and humor - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

ninlaith · 07-13-2004, 03:14 PM

Ever ponder those "What If's" that you wish you could see the outcome to? Ever have any ideas about the kind of merchandise that could be created? Any humorous thoughts? I'd like to know them.

Example: Cars

If Frodo had to drive the ring to Mordor he would ride in this. With a V-6 engine and 6 cylinders the Ford 4x4 Ringbearer....He's not the only one who carries it.

Estelyn Telcontar · 07-13-2004, 03:59 PM

This thread topic, as a humorous one, is most appropriate on the Middle-Earth Mirth forum - I'm moving it there, where those interested may read and post on it.

One of the Nine · 07-13-2004, 04:54 PM

Ok, I have a couple.

~ Tanks
Both sides would definately use these at Pellenor Fields. It might even make things a little more even. Although there would probably be more orcs than tanks, the Gondarian soldiers would have no trouble running them all over.

~Teflon Pans
The Hobbits would definately see this as a much needed improvement to their muchly overused kitchens. No sticking, no scrubbing, so they can spend more time eating then cleaning up.

ninlaith · 07-13-2004, 05:12 PM

One of the Nine I like the Teflon pans...very clever

. and thanks for the move. I'm new at this so I need all the help I can get.

The Perky Ent · 07-13-2004, 08:33 PM

I got something better than a car. A helicopter! Frodo can hover over Mt. Doom, drop the ring in, and fly back. Also, for the Nazgul, fireproof vests!

ninlaith · 07-13-2004, 09:36 PM

very good. I never thought of that one. Wait...mental picture...done..that was easy we'll be home in time for luncheon.

Bombadil · 07-13-2004, 10:23 PM

Elven cloaks are nice...but I'm sure Harry Potter's invisibility cloak would've fared much better for all...

HerenIstarion · 07-14-2004, 02:14 AM

Helicopter is a good idea, but we need greater scope! Why bother yourself flying, when you can use Rivendell Nuclear Plant facilities? One Ring in, a lot of cheap power to light elven lanterns out...

Essex · 07-14-2004, 10:21 AM

What about giving the ring to a really large bird to fly to Mount Doom and drop into the Cracks of Doom?

ninlaith · 07-14-2004, 11:12 AM

yeah just have one of the eagles do it. It'll be fine.

One of the Nine · 07-14-2004, 11:23 AM

I have an idea, what about computers, or a mail system. Just send the Ring to: Mount Doom PO box 18526 Mount Doom, Mordor, then be done with it.

ninlaith · 07-14-2004, 02:37 PM

good one. I have a joke I've been thinking about for awhile.

setting: Karadhras

Legolas walking on top of snow and falls through

Frodo looks up and says "Yeah, you're real magical!"

Bombadil · 07-14-2004, 04:49 PM

How about constructing a mount doom replica! Way up north past the shire. Make it within walking distance for Frodo.

ninlaith · 07-15-2004, 08:51 AM

good one. He'll be home before dark.

Feanor of the Peredhil · 07-15-2004, 09:18 AM

Can you only imagine the marketing opportunities for Stetson in Rohan?

Himhenwen · 07-15-2004, 11:40 AM

They could really sell OFF Bug Repellent,
With all of those bugs in the Marshes they needed it!
And the last thing they needed was Frodo killing over because of West Nile.

ninlaith · 07-15-2004, 12:15 PM

thanks for the Stetson one! I think I busted a gut! and for the OFF one...I just have one thing to say to you...

What do they eat when they can't get Hobbit?!

Thanks guys you've really been making this thread worth while

elronds_daughter · 07-15-2004, 05:29 PM

what about cell phones? all Frodo would've needed to do in Bree (wondering, "Where the heck is Ganalf??") was call Gandalf's cell. No more worries. Then Faramir could've just called Aragorn to find out if it really was Boromir that he saw floating down Anduin.

In two words: endless possiblities.

One of the Nine · 07-15-2004, 07:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elronds_daughter

In two words: endless possiblities.

I quite agree. If the Frodo and the gang lived here and now, man would they have an easy time. They could take the earliest flight to Mordor, take a little tour in Ithilien, then go with a police squad and drop it in. Then, maybe a little sight seeing at the grand Gondor, there's been a recent fire there, but the small police force is doing fine with it all. Then you take the earliest flight home sitting comfortably in a boeing 747.

ninlaith · 07-16-2004, 07:42 AM

very very funny

.

elronds_daughter · 07-16-2004, 12:05 PM

you know, ninlaith, you could chime in with more of your own suggestions, instead of letting us take over. anywho, here's my ligit reason for posting...

Bilbo's birthday party would have been a lot easier to put on if there'd been a Party City somewhere. streamers, party favors, etc. wonderful convenience, really.

One of the Nine · 07-16-2004, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elronds_daughter

Bilbo's birthday party would have been a lot easier to put on if there'd been a Party City somewhere. streamers, party favors, etc. wonderful convenience, really.

I quite agree. Very much easier with Party City.

Although, think of it. If the book happened in this world setting, would there be a book? They'd have so many conveinences(sp?) that the whole reason for the books making would be nothing. Modern technology could probably just take care of the ring where Frodo lived. That would be wierd.

Mithalwen · 07-16-2004, 01:53 PM

Of course The Council of Elrond would have been held as a webchat..........

And Gandalf could have checked out the ring on Google without all that tiresome rummaging in the archives of Minas Tirith.......

ninlaith · 07-16-2004, 02:03 PM

I wonder how much bleach Saruman had to use to keep his cloak looking clean?

Feanor of the Peredhil · 07-16-2004, 02:06 PM

I can just see the modern day equivilant of the Destruction of the Ring: no doubt Frodo would have to toss it into a nuclear reactor somewhere. The resultant explosion would destroy Sauron, his minions, his lands... Mordor The Parking Lot.

One of the Nine · 07-16-2004, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Feanor of the Peredhil

I can just see the modern day equivilant of the Destruction of the Ring: no doubt Frodo would have to toss it into a nuclear reactor somewhere. The resultant explosion would destroy Sauron, his minions, his lands... Mordor The Parking Lot.

Very funny. All of you, very funny. Although, the Nuclear Plant of Sauron would be a good start to taking over the world.... *gets lost in own thoughts*

ninlaith · 07-16-2004, 06:11 PM

you know that scene in Moria where they're surrounded by orcs before the balrog comes out? I'm always waiting for one of the orcs to say

"What's in your wallet?"

One of the Nine · 07-16-2004, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ninlaith

"What's in your wallet?"

Ah, very funny. Very funny all.

Himhenwen · 07-17-2004, 04:45 PM

That reminds me...
Sam could have saved time and food if he used light weight, easy to store Ziplock bags and Gladwear bowls!!!!! He didn't even think about foam plates, cups, and bowls. He could have saved time and it wouldn't have been so heavy.

Nimrothiel · 07-17-2004, 10:57 PM

Don't forget about Ramen noodles!

ninlaith · 07-18-2004, 09:42 AM

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if Frodo just said;

"Ehh, I don't feel like going on a journey today."

Lindir · 07-18-2004, 04:42 PM

It would be so much better if Gandalf had a really big fire extenguisher during the confrontation w/ the balrog.....the only thing that would be left of him is rock or ash. It would be better if the whole fellowship had their own.

ninlaith · 07-19-2004, 11:56 AM

Yeah giant ghostbuster type fire extinguishers. That would take care of the Balrog and save them time.

ninlaith · 07-20-2004, 12:41 PM

What if they came out with Green Dragon Brew sold by the flagon? Personally I think they would make a killing.

Himhenwen · 07-20-2004, 01:03 PM

Oh ya I could wait three more years for that even though I don't like brews. It would be worth it!!!!!! Except I would like a pint!

Himhenwen · 07-20-2004, 01:11 PM

I was just thinking so watch out!
What would of happened or been said if the table that Merry and Pippin where dancing on broke???? Just something to ponder?

ninlaith · 07-20-2004, 06:36 PM

Now that's funny! But what about Pip and Merry? they could be hurt? But it's still funny.

elronds_daughter · 07-21-2004, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ninlaith

What if they came out with Green Dragon Brew sold by the flagon? Personally I think they would make a killing.

heh, heh... definitly. count me in.

ninlaith · 07-21-2004, 05:50 PM

I was just thinking about this the other day. You know how Frodo wakes up in Rivendell and Elrond says "Welcome to Rivendell.....Frodo Baggins." Well what if instead he said "Welcome to Rivendell.....Mr. Anderson."

Feanor of the Peredhil · 07-21-2004, 06:14 PM

Sick of losing electrolytes through tiring battles? Looking for a great substitution for water? Gaterade... the official drink of the War of the Ring.

07-13-2004, 03:14 PM	#1
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	What if's, franchises, and humor Ever ponder those "What If's" that you wish you could see the outcome to? Ever have any ideas about the kind of merchandise that could be created? Any humorous thoughts? I'd like to know them. Example: Cars If Frodo had to drive the ring to Mordor he would ride in this. With a V-6 engine and 6 cylinders the Ford 4x4 Ringbearer....He's not the only one who carries it. Last edited by ninlaith; 07-13-2004 at 03:26 PM.

07-13-2004, 03:59 PM	#2
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,645	This thread topic, as a humorous one, is most appropriate on the Middle-Earth Mirth forum - I'm moving it there, where those interested may read and post on it. __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

07-13-2004, 04:54 PM	#3
One of the Nine Haunting Spirit Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In my mind. What? Why are you looking at me like that? Posts: 84	Ok, I have a couple. ~ Tanks Both sides would definately use these at Pellenor Fields. It might even make things a little more even. Although there would probably be more orcs than tanks, the Gondarian soldiers would have no trouble running them all over. ~Teflon Pans The Hobbits would definately see this as a much needed improvement to their muchly overused kitchens. No sticking, no scrubbing, so they can spend more time eating then cleaning up. __________________ I have a very short attention span, and it sometimes affects me when I'm, ooo a squirrel....

07-13-2004, 08:33 PM	#5
The Perky Ent Maniacal Mage Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Setting sail for Umbar, with Firefoot at my side! Posts: 3,332	I got something better than a car. A helicopter! Frodo can hover over Mt. Doom, drop the ring in, and fly back. Also, for the Nazgul, fireproof vests! __________________ 'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'

07-13-2004, 10:23 PM	#7
Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Old Forest Posts: 488	Elven cloaks are nice...but I'm sure Harry Potter's invisibility cloak would've fared much better for all... __________________ "'Eldest, that's what I am... Tom remembers the first raindrop and the first acorn... He knew the dark under the stars when it was fearless - before the Dark Lord came from Outside.'"

07-13-2004, 05:12 PM	#4
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	One of the Nine I like the Teflon pans...very clever . and thanks for the move. I'm new at this so I need all the help I can get.

07-13-2004, 09:36 PM	#6
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	very good. I never thought of that one. Wait...mental picture...done..that was easy we'll be home in time for luncheon.

07-14-2004, 02:14 AM	#8
HerenIstarion Deadnight Chanter Join Date: Sep 2000 Posts: 4,301	helicopters, shmelicotpers... Helicopter is a good idea, but we need greater scope! Why bother yourself flying, when you can use Rivendell Nuclear Plant facilities? One Ring in, a lot of cheap power to light elven lanterns out... __________________ Egroeg Ihkhsal - Would you believe in the love at first sight? - Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time!

07-14-2004, 10:21 AM	#9
Essex Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Essex, England Posts: 887	What about giving the ring to a really large bird to fly to Mount Doom and drop into the Cracks of Doom?

07-14-2004, 11:12 AM	#10
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	yeah just have one of the eagles do it. It'll be fine.

07-14-2004, 11:23 AM	#11
One of the Nine Haunting Spirit Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In my mind. What? Why are you looking at me like that? Posts: 84	I have an idea, what about computers, or a mail system. Just send the Ring to: Mount Doom PO box 18526 Mount Doom, Mordor, then be done with it. __________________ I have a very short attention span, and it sometimes affects me when I'm, ooo a squirrel....

07-14-2004, 02:37 PM	#12
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	good one. I have a joke I've been thinking about for awhile. setting: Karadhras Legolas walking on top of snow and falls through Frodo looks up and says "Yeah, you're real magical!"

07-14-2004, 04:49 PM	#13
Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Old Forest Posts: 488	How about constructing a mount doom replica! Way up north past the shire. Make it within walking distance for Frodo. __________________ "'Eldest, that's what I am... Tom remembers the first raindrop and the first acorn... He knew the dark under the stars when it was fearless - before the Dark Lord came from Outside.'"

07-15-2004, 08:51 AM	#14
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	good one. He'll be home before dark.

07-15-2004, 09:18 AM	#15
Feanor of the Peredhil La Belle Dame sans Merci Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: perpetual uncertainty Posts: 5,956	Can you only imagine the marketing opportunities for Stetson in Rohan? __________________ peace

07-15-2004, 11:40 AM	#16
Himhenwen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: far far across the glassy sea in the Grey Havens Posts: 16	They could really sell OFF Bug Repellent, With all of those bugs in the Marshes they needed it! And the last thing they needed was Frodo killing over because of West Nile. __________________ Himhenwen

07-15-2004, 12:15 PM	#17
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	thanks for the Stetson one! I think I busted a gut! and for the OFF one...I just have one thing to say to you... What do they eat when they can't get Hobbit?! Thanks guys you've really been making this thread worth while

07-15-2004, 05:29 PM	#18
elronds_daughter Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2004 Location: Between the fortune cookie and the post-its. Posts: 740	what about cell phones? all Frodo would've needed to do in Bree (wondering, "Where the heck is Ganalf??") was call Gandalf's cell. No more worries. Then Faramir could've just called Aragorn to find out if it really was Boromir that he saw floating down Anduin. In two words: endless possiblities. __________________ I'd like to be the king of all Londinium and wear a shiny hat.

07-16-2004, 07:42 AM	#20
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	very very funny .

07-16-2004, 12:05 PM	#21
elronds_daughter Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2004 Location: Between the fortune cookie and the post-its. Posts: 740	you know, ninlaith, you could chime in with more of your own suggestions, instead of letting us take over. anywho, here's my ligit reason for posting... Bilbo's birthday party would have been a lot easier to put on if there'd been a Party City somewhere. streamers, party favors, etc. wonderful convenience, really. __________________ I'd like to be the king of all Londinium and wear a shiny hat.

07-16-2004, 01:53 PM	#23
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,916	Of course The Council of Elrond would have been held as a webchat.......... And Gandalf could have checked out the ring on Google without all that tiresome rummaging in the archives of Minas Tirith....... __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace

07-16-2004, 02:03 PM	#24
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	All very funny I wonder how much bleach Saruman had to use to keep his cloak looking clean?

07-16-2004, 02:06 PM	#25
Feanor of the Peredhil La Belle Dame sans Merci Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: perpetual uncertainty Posts: 5,956	I can just see the modern day equivilant of the Destruction of the Ring: no doubt Frodo would have to toss it into a nuclear reactor somewhere. The resultant explosion would destroy Sauron, his minions, his lands... Mordor The Parking Lot. __________________ peace

07-16-2004, 06:11 PM	#27
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	you know that scene in Moria where they're surrounded by orcs before the balrog comes out? I'm always waiting for one of the orcs to say "What's in your wallet?"

07-17-2004, 04:45 PM	#29
Himhenwen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: far far across the glassy sea in the Grey Havens Posts: 16	That reminds me... Sam could have saved time and food if he used light weight, easy to store Ziplock bags and Gladwear bowls!!!!! He didn't even think about foam plates, cups, and bowls. He could have saved time and it wouldn't have been so heavy. __________________ Himhenwen

07-17-2004, 10:57 PM	#30
Nimrothiel Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Imladris Posts: 288	Don't forget about Ramen noodles! __________________ "Walrus?! Will you quit makin' up imaginary animals?!!" ~ Sarge; Red vs. Blue

07-18-2004, 09:42 AM	#31
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	funny, funny, funny Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if Frodo just said; "Ehh, I don't feel like going on a journey today."

07-18-2004, 04:42 PM	#32
Lindir Haunting Spirit Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: The Void Posts: 98	It would be so much better if Gandalf had a really big fire extenguisher during the confrontation w/ the balrog.....the only thing that would be left of him is rock or ash. It would be better if the whole fellowship had their own. __________________ Come not between the Nazgul and his prey!Or he will not slay thee in thy turn.He will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured, and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye.

07-19-2004, 11:56 AM	#33
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	Yeah giant ghostbuster type fire extinguishers. That would take care of the Balrog and save them time.

07-20-2004, 12:41 PM	#34
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	What if they came out with Green Dragon Brew sold by the flagon? Personally I think they would make a killing.

07-20-2004, 01:03 PM	#35
Himhenwen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: far far across the glassy sea in the Grey Havens Posts: 16	Oh ya I could wait three more years for that even though I don't like brews. It would be worth it!!!!!! Except I would like a pint! __________________ Himhenwen

07-20-2004, 01:11 PM	#36
Himhenwen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: far far across the glassy sea in the Grey Havens Posts: 16	I was just thinking so watch out! What would of happened or been said if the table that Merry and Pippin where dancing on broke???? Just something to ponder? __________________ Himhenwen

07-20-2004, 06:36 PM	#37
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	Now that's funny! But what about Pip and Merry? they could be hurt? But it's still funny.

07-21-2004, 05:50 PM	#39
ninlaith Wight Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: in my hobbit hole Posts: 204	I was just thinking about this the other day. You know how Frodo wakes up in Rivendell and Elrond says "Welcome to Rivendell.....Frodo Baggins." Well what if instead he said "Welcome to Rivendell.....Mr. Anderson." __________________ "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve!"-Bilbo Baggins

07-21-2004, 06:14 PM	#40
Feanor of the Peredhil La Belle Dame sans Merci Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: perpetual uncertainty Posts: 5,956	Sick of losing electrolytes through tiring battles? Looking for a great substitution for water? Gaterade... the official drink of the War of the Ring. __________________ peace