Barrow-Downs Birthday Party at the Fields of Cormallen - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Birdland · 05-20-2002, 10:41 PM

After her nose stops throbbing, Birdie realizes she has some catching up to do. "This has turned into a real 4-Pager party!" she thinks.

She watches as Bee-Dubya makes his first appearance among his assembled thralls. He's looking really good in his regal putrification. Suddenly a reporter from the National En-Shirer-er brings up that old chestnut about the "Akasha connection".

"Geez", thinks Birdie, "give it a rest. Anyone can see that the brat doesn't look anything like him", turning a significant glance towards Mithadan.

Suddenly, those magic words "abduct and sacrifice" rings through the hall. Yes! Will he go for the Aztec or Druid method? But the Bee-Dubya just give a dismissive wave to his intended victim, and proceeds to the bar, which has enough home-brewed miruvor to make all of Elvenkind behave like a drunken sailor ear-li-in-the-morning.

"That's so sad," pouts Birdie, "He's losing his touch." She attributes it to the John Edward channeling he experienced in Cincinnati. But seeing how he's sucking up the ale, she feels a sense of hope. "He can still put it away, one arm or no. Maybe he'll loosen up as the evening progresses."

But wait...what have we here? Uncorrupted Dr. Pepper? This will never do. Carbonated prune juice-based beverages should never be drunk straight. Stealthfully, Birdie pulls out her concentrated "Eessence of Ent-Draught" and applies a drop to the rim of each unopened Dr. Pepper can. There, that ought to do the trick.

Birdie suddenly slips on an unopened missive under her foot. What's this? Abandoned well-wishes for the Barrow Wight? She holds one up to the light to see if it contains cash.

Suddenly, a red cap with a jaunty feather appears out of the crowd. "Chile o' the 7th Age!" beams Birdie. Good to see ya in the rotting flesh, at last!"

But C.7.A is not to be chummed out of her appointed rounds. "If you want to claim those missives, Birdland, that will be twelve-hundred-and-thirty-two silver pennies for delivery...in cash."

"Oh...uh...Sayyyy...Why do you think Frodo just wimped out like that at the last minute, Chile'?", blurts Birdie, desperately.

"Wimped out???!!!" screams C.7.A. "I really don't understand why people can't appreciate the ramifications of the Ring's total Gehirnwäschen effect on the bearer..."

Birdie backs away slowly, as C.7.A. give one of her incredible dissertation on arcane Tolkieana, complete with the twenty-seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each
one was.

"Whew!, that was close," thinks Birdie, feeling a bit peckish, by now. But the mushroom plates have been wiped clean, and she gives the Evil Eye to Kuruharan, the Middle-Earth version of a Fungi Hoover. The vegan cheesecake has been reduced to crumbs.

She waves irritably at a Neekerbreeker hovering over the buffet table, (even though Birdie is a Neekerbreeker herself, she appreciates how annoying her own kind can be), when suddenly she realizes that the diminutive pest is none other than Maril-Etc.-Etc.-Etc. "Hey, Maril! Love the new look!"

"Really?" says Maril. "You don't think these wings make me look fat?"

Birdie assures her that she is ahead of the trend. and starts to ask her if she ever ran into Gilgore after the last party, when suddenly C.7.A screams that a spider has landed in her plate. "Don't worry. It's protein!" shouts Birdie, still searching for some real food. The Lembas, while tasty, has gotten old fast.

Birdie scans the room, noticing that Stephanos has finally gotten off of his Greek duff and is making a move on the lovely Estelyn, (or is he just interested in snagging that mithral tiara?) Sindacuion is loading up at the buffet table, muttering about "munchies". Piosenniel is humming "All Around My Hat", while sitting Below the Salt.

A group of hobbits calling themselves "The Shire-elles" are doing a little number dedicated to the Bee-Dubya's fan fictions; called "Leader of the Hacks". Aosama is doing a traditional Rohirrim folk-dance, which looks suspiciously like The Stroll. Twinkle and Maril are having a diminutive dog-fight in the center of the room, egged on by a band of dwarves screaming "Top Gun!"

Well, Birdie seems to have caught up on the action, and wonders what in Middle-Earth could happen next?

[ May 21, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]

05-20-2002, 10:41 PM	#11
Birdland Ghastly Neekerbreeker Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: the banks of the mighty Scioto Posts: 1,757	After her nose stops throbbing, Birdie realizes she has some catching up to do. "This has turned into a real 4-Pager party!" she thinks. She watches as Bee-Dubya makes his first appearance among his assembled thralls. He's looking really good in his regal putrification. Suddenly a reporter from the National En-Shirer-er brings up that old chestnut about the "Akasha connection". "Geez", thinks Birdie, "give it a rest. Anyone can see that the brat doesn't look anything like him", turning a significant glance towards Mithadan. Suddenly, those magic words "abduct and sacrifice" rings through the hall. Yes! Will he go for the Aztec or Druid method? But the Bee-Dubya just give a dismissive wave to his intended victim, and proceeds to the bar, which has enough home-brewed miruvor to make all of Elvenkind behave like a drunken sailor ear-li-in-the-morning. "That's so sad," pouts Birdie, "He's losing his touch." She attributes it to the John Edward channeling he experienced in Cincinnati. But seeing how he's sucking up the ale, she feels a sense of hope. "He can still put it away, one arm or no. Maybe he'll loosen up as the evening progresses." But wait...what have we here? Uncorrupted Dr. Pepper? This will never do. Carbonated prune juice-based beverages should never be drunk straight. Stealthfully, Birdie pulls out her concentrated "Eessence of Ent-Draught" and applies a drop to the rim of each unopened Dr. Pepper can. There, that ought to do the trick. Birdie suddenly slips on an unopened missive under her foot. What's this? Abandoned well-wishes for the Barrow Wight? She holds one up to the light to see if it contains cash. Suddenly, a red cap with a jaunty feather appears out of the crowd. "Chile o' the 7th Age!" beams Birdie. Good to see ya in the rotting flesh, at last!" But C.7.A is not to be chummed out of her appointed rounds. "If you want to claim those missives, Birdland, that will be twelve-hundred-and-thirty-two silver pennies for delivery...in cash." "Oh...uh...Sayyyy...Why do you think Frodo just wimped out like that at the last minute, Chile'?", blurts Birdie, desperately. "Wimped out???!!!" screams C.7.A. "I really don't understand why people can't appreciate the ramifications of the Ring's total Gehirnwäschen effect on the bearer..." Birdie backs away slowly, as C.7.A. give one of her incredible dissertation on arcane Tolkieana, complete with the twenty-seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was. "Whew!, that was close," thinks Birdie, feeling a bit peckish, by now. But the mushroom plates have been wiped clean, and she gives the Evil Eye to Kuruharan, the Middle-Earth version of a Fungi Hoover. The vegan cheesecake has been reduced to crumbs. She waves irritably at a Neekerbreeker hovering over the buffet table, (even though Birdie is a Neekerbreeker herself, she appreciates how annoying her own kind can be), when suddenly she realizes that the diminutive pest is none other than Maril-Etc.-Etc.-Etc. "Hey, Maril! Love the new look!" "Really?" says Maril. "You don't think these wings make me look fat?" Birdie assures her that she is ahead of the trend. and starts to ask her if she ever ran into Gilgore after the last party, when suddenly C.7.A screams that a spider has landed in her plate. "Don't worry. It's protein!" shouts Birdie, still searching for some real food. The Lembas, while tasty, has gotten old fast. Birdie scans the room, noticing that Stephanos has finally gotten off of his Greek duff and is making a move on the lovely Estelyn, (or is he just interested in snagging that mithral tiara?) Sindacuion is loading up at the buffet table, muttering about "munchies". Piosenniel is humming "All Around My Hat", while sitting Below the Salt. A group of hobbits calling themselves "The Shire-elles" are doing a little number dedicated to the Bee-Dubya's fan fictions; called "Leader of the Hacks". Aosama is doing a traditional Rohirrim folk-dance, which looks suspiciously like The Stroll. Twinkle and Maril are having a diminutive dog-fight in the center of the room, egged on by a band of dwarves screaming "Top Gun!" Well, Birdie seems to have caught up on the action, and wonders what in Middle-Earth could happen next? [ May 21, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]