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Old 06-27-2018, 03:20 PM   #1
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Silmaril Durin's Folk

This is the first draft of the chapter Durin's Folk.

This chapter uses Appendix A as a base text. However, I have marked every source and addition for clarity.

The markings are:
FY-HL-xx for all the headlines for the Fading Years.
DF-SL-xx for all expansions and changes to the narrative.

Some conventions of my writing:

Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalized text, normally only used for general changes, as well as changes which are a part of replacement that is not grammatical.
Underlined Text = text changed for grammatical reasons in the process of combining and inserting and removing.
<source example> = additions with source information
...... = This section of the paragraph is unchanged from the source.


DF-SL-01 <Appendix A {But there}There were dragons in the wastes beyond the Grey Mountains; and after many years they became strong again and multiplied, ...... was slain at the door of his hall by a great cold-drake.
Not long after most of Durin’s Folk abandoned the Grey Mountains. Grór, ..... and there was feasting and song in the Halls of Erebor.
So the rumor of the wealth of Erebor spread .... Great Hall and lay there upon a bed of gold.
From the sack and the burning many of Thrór's ..... a small company of their kinsmen and faithful followers.
Years afterwards Thrór, now old, poor, ..... Of the Ring he said to Thráin at their parting:
'This may prove the foundation of new fortune for you yet, though that seems unlikely. But it needs gold to breed gold.'
'Surely you do not think of returning to Erebor?' said Thráin.
'Not at my age,' said Thrór. 'Our vengeance on Smaug I bequeath to you and your sons. But I am tired of poverty and the scorn of Men. I go to see what I can find.' He did not say where.
He was a little crazed perhaps with age ...... Redhorn Pass and came down into Azanulbizar.
When Thrór came to Moria the Gate ..... he began to creep near, but there came a voice from within the gate:
'Come on, beardling! We can see you. But there is no need to be afraid today. We need you as a messenger.'
Then Nár came up, and found that it was indeed ..... and the voice said:
'If beggars will not wait ..... I am the master!'
Then Nár turned the head and .... Azog [Footnote: Azog was the father of Bolg.] said:
'Drop it! Be off! .... coins of little worth.
Weeping, Nár fled down .... flinging the pieces to the black crows.

Such was the tale that Nár ..... deep places beneath the earth.
Thráin at once sent messengers .... Azog in every den under mountain.
At last all the Orcs that fled ..... held back by Azog for the last need.
At first fortune was against ..... mattocks all who stood in their way.
Then Náin stood before ..... in the valley too rough?'
Thereupon Azog came forth, .... he turned to Náin, and said:
'What? Yet another beggar .... neck was broken and he fell.
Then Azog laughed, and he lifted ..... fled back towards the Gate.
Up the steps after him ..... who has felt great fear.
When at last the battle ..... still stand or had hope of healing.
None the less in the morning ..... our hands are too small to hold it.'
And those who were not ..... Durin’s Folk walk again in Moria.'

So it was that after Azanulbizar ..... was seen in Lórien. [Footnote: Such dealings with the dead .... burned Dwarf,’ and that is enough.]
When the dreadful fires were ..... they can wield sharper tools again.'
So Thráin and Thorin with what remained ...... numbers slowly increased. [Footnote: They had very few women-folk. Dís Thráin’s daughter was there. She was the mother of Fíli and Kíli, who were born in the Ered Luin. Thorin had no wife. DF-SL-02 <Appendix A Of the other companions of Thorin Oakenshield in the journey to Erebor Ori, Nori, and Dori were also of the House of Durin, and more remote kinsmen of Thorin: Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur were descended from Dwarves of Moria but were not of Durin’s line.>] But, as Thrór had said, ..... metal they had little or none.

Of this Ring something may be said here. DF-SL-03 used in Of the Rings of Power {It was believed by the Dwarves of Durin’s Folk to be the first of the Seven that was forged; and they say that it was given to the King of Khazad-dûm, Durin III, by the Elven-smiths themselves and not by Sauron, though doubtless his evil power was on it, since he had aided in the forging of all the Seven. But the possessors of the Ring did not display it or speak of it, and they seldom surrendered it until near death, so that others did not know for certain where it was bestowed.} Some thought that it had remained in Khazad-dûm, ..... not found on the body of Azog.
None the less it may well be, ..... Dwarves had proved untamable by this means. DF-SL-04 <Making of Appendix A Note 7 The Ring-wearer became rich especially in gold: that is his dealings brought him wealth according to what he traded in: if in lead, lead, if in silver, silver, if in gems, then gems more abundant and of greater size and worth.> The only power over them ..... possessors and desire to dispossess them.

It was therefore perhaps partly ..... said farewell and departed.
Little is known of what happened ..... and them at last he died.
So Thorin Oakenshield became .... Lonely Mountain far away.
The years lengthened. The embers .... smote the red iron on the anvil.>
DF-SL-05 <Appendix A
Dís was the daughter of Thráin II. She is the only dwarf-woman .... and that the Dwarves 'grow out of stone'.
It is because of the fewness ...... being engrossed in their crafts.>
FY-HL-01: The title is self-explanatory. This chapter deals with the War of the Dwarves and Orcs and its leadup and fallout, so the title is fitting.

DF-SL-01: We start where we left off with the Dwarven narrative in Appendix A. Some slight editing is done to create a cohesive beginning of a chapter.

DF-SL-02: This is part of a later footnote to the family tree of the Longbeard Dwarves given later on in Appendix A. I think it is relevant and goes well here.

DF-SL-03: This text was used in Of the Rings of Power and so I removed it here. I do not think we lose much this way.

DF-SL-04: This bit from an earlier draft is not given in the published Appendix A, but I think is worth including.

DF-SL-05: This addition from Appendix A is worth including, but perhaps this is not the best place. If anyone has a better idea, I am open to it.

Last edited by ArcusCalion; 06-27-2018 at 06:30 PM.
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