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Old 06-25-2003, 10:27 PM   #1
Sapphire_Flame
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The Eye The orcs at the back

This is something that's been on my mind lately:

At Helm's Deep, there are 10,000 orcs attacking the fortress, but surely not all of them can be up and attacking the wall at the same time. What are the ones at the back doing? Playing poker? Let's hear some ideas people!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 06-25-2003, 10:35 PM   #2
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i bet they were taking to time to refine themselves, reading philosopy, practicing Quenya, and learing to yell in harmony ( no way an orc can sing)

or...

Sleeping, pigging out, gambling, any other useless things they could think of

[ August 07, 2003: Message edited by: Maylin ]
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Old 06-26-2003, 12:01 AM   #3
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Probably dreaming 'bout how they might change the course of the battle, and if they would be honoured beyond all other orcs if they played a major part in winning. (Do Orcs even think like that?!?) Or we could just say they were playing monopoly (" Hey, I just passed go, you non murderer! give me 200!" " Dont insult me! Non murderer indeed!"
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Old 06-26-2003, 08:37 AM   #4
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Tolkien

Dreaming about the girl they left behind, of course...:: shudder:: Nightmares. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]
Peace
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Old 06-26-2003, 09:24 AM   #5
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trading gossip [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 06-26-2003, 10:33 AM   #6
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watching the great battle and betting on who's going to kill who.
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Old 06-26-2003, 10:47 AM   #7
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Quote:
betting on who's going to kill who.
'I bet Orc number 3,892 is going to kill Eorlinga number 109!' [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 06-26-2003, 12:16 PM   #8
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The Eye

Quote:
I bet Orc number 3,892 is going to kill Eorlinga number 109!
'No way, Orc 3,892 isn't that good. I bet it'll be Orc 973 to take Eorlinga 109.'

[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Keep it up, these are brilliant!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 06-26-2003, 01:26 PM   #9
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Nah, they'd be catching up on they're school work. I mean, imagine all those orks working for Saruman to get money to finish their college degrees.

And don't forget about writing letters to their moms back home. Sniff....
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Old 06-26-2003, 02:09 PM   #10
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Punch and Judy. Or Richard and Judy for those with a portable TV.
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Old 06-26-2003, 02:17 PM   #11
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they are taking relaxing mud baths or just knitting nice, warm mufflers, don't you think?
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Old 06-26-2003, 03:37 PM   #12
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Hacking at each other. They're orcs for the sake of Pete!
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Old 06-26-2003, 05:18 PM   #13
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They're actually having a nice, civilized game of chess. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 06-27-2003, 06:28 AM   #14
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Tolkien

Working out the sum of [The amount of Eorlings] times [amount of orcs] divided by pie, added to the amount of horses... etc. All without the help of a calculator. Not all orcs are idiots, you know! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 06-28-2003, 09:05 AM   #15
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Sting

Discussing the new line of L'Oreal hair conditioners and how Legolas is SO much uglier than Uruk no. 1235. And of course, what came before: the chicken or the egg [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Corny, I know [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 06-28-2003, 10:24 PM   #16
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Silmaril

engaging in scholarly debates over whether or not Balrogs have wings
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Old 06-30-2003, 10:25 AM   #17
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Eye

lol these are so funny!
Quote:
engaging in scholarly debates over whether or not Balrogs have wings
that's great!

I think they would be drinking tea and eating crumpets(sp?) and disscussing the weather,catching up on the latest gossip, and critiquing Legolas' outfit.
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Old 06-30-2003, 12:04 PM   #18
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Sting

perhaps they engage in debates about how Sauron can use the Clear-Eyes without any arms...much less hands.. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 06-30-2003, 03:34 PM   #19
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The Eye

[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] These are great!!!

Quote:
how Sauron can use the Clear-Eyes without any arms...much less hands...
Huh. Maybe since they're Saruman's orcs, they could be trying to figure out how he keeps his robes that white with all that mud that he walks through all the time (you know, like in the pits).

Oh, and elfearz1, Welcome to the Downs!!! Enjoy being dead. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 06-30-2003, 04:54 PM   #20
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Eye

I think they'd be painting their nails. Hot pink of course! lol thanks sapphire!

[ June 30, 2003: Message edited by: elfearz1 ]
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Old 06-30-2003, 05:01 PM   #21
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the orcs in back? thw Ocs in back are probably having themselves a few nice games of TTT on their portable Tvs hehe

(seriously the orcs in back were probably archers and or siege operators
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Old 07-02-2003, 03:27 PM   #22
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Hehehehe!
They're probably all staring at Uruk No 4,029 (Bortez)'s Urukesses of the Month calendar, all drooling over the half Nazgúl one! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

OR

THey're probably cheering like at a soccer match, going "FOUL" when a ladder is knocked down, and "RED CARD" when an Eorling kills some Orcs.

Hey!
They could also be constructing a site called "From the Battlefront.......or back, what the Battle of Helm's Deep was REALLY like!" on Uruk No 9,999 (Notlarztz)'s new Dell PC with Windows XP. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

See ya!
Namarié!
From
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Old 07-02-2003, 04:21 PM   #23
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Eh, they probably got bored and ate each other. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 07-02-2003, 04:29 PM   #24
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Whistling 'Teddybears' picnic' of course!

(if you go down to the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise......) [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 07-02-2003, 05:27 PM   #25
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Nice ones, Elróthiel! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

These are brilliant, keep it up! (I really can't believe that so many people have replied to my thread [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] )

Abedithon le! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 07-09-2003, 02:34 PM   #26
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1420!

Quote:
Seriously the orcs in the back would probably be seige engineers or archers.
Would arrows and seige engineers reach that far?

They would be fighting Huorns.

Berfore the Huorns came they would be sitting down in chairs at tables trying to invent things like refriderators so they wouldn't have to eat "maggotty bread for three stinkin' days."

I suck at this
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Old 07-10-2003, 05:15 PM   #27
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Sting

Don't feel bad, we all have our days.

In fact, I'm experiencing similar difficulties myself...
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Old 07-10-2003, 07:14 PM   #28
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Quote:
I really can't believe that so many people have replied to my thread
Heh, I really can't believe that so many people have replied to this thread! How ridiculous.

However, I believe they would be fighting one another, since they couldn't get at anyone else. I mean, they're programmed for battle!

Or maybe they're wondering why it is that the orcs in front of them keep keeling over. At least, the ones who are just out of bow range would be.
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Old 07-14-2003, 08:52 PM   #29
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Kates Frodo Temp: Ha ha ha. [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]
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Old 07-15-2003, 07:45 PM   #30
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I think they'd be posting on the downs bwahahahahahhahaa [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]


... well I thought it was funny

[ July 17, 2003: Message edited by: elfearz1 ]
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Old 07-23-2003, 11:51 PM   #31
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The Uruks at the back would be practicing their irish dancing for their recital on the weekend!
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Old 07-24-2003, 01:28 AM   #32
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Sting

  • Talking about the weather
  • Playing cards
  • Whinging
  • Playing mournful guitar and singing 'Why are we waiting?'
  • Listening to the football on somebody's mini radio (they weren't cheering because of the attack, it was a goal against Manchester United)

[ July 24, 2003: Message edited by: Airerûthiel ]
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Old 07-24-2003, 09:26 PM   #33
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Man U??? they don't support Man U...they support liverpool for pete's sake!

Anyway they aren't into that crude physical stuff. Uruk-Hai are civilised! They listen to Bach and do cross-stitch.
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Old 07-24-2003, 10:45 PM   #34
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Sting

This is wonderfully amusing! Kate's Frodo Temp: sublime there: "just out of bow range!" [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Perhaps they would be loading catapults with heavy artillery (other Orcs!).
Orc 1 to Orc 2: "Hey Brokenek! Come here!"
Orc2 to Orc 1: "My name's not Brokenek!"
Orc 1 to Orc 2 (loads Orc 2 onto catapult): "It will be!"

OK, not hilarious, but the best I can come up with!

Cheers,
Lyta
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Old 07-25-2003, 10:21 AM   #35
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Osse, I said a goal against Man Utd!Of course Orcs support Liverpool - did you think they have no taste?!
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Old 07-25-2003, 04:11 PM   #36
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They were probably calling the orcs in the front on their cell phones and asking how the battle was going.
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Old 07-27-2003, 07:09 AM   #37
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Question

How intelligent do you take orcs to be? They were probably gormlessly standing there. Or else pushing forward.
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Old 07-28-2003, 01:47 PM   #38
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White-Hand

They were gossip about Saruman's love life.
Orc 1: Did you hear that he was dating Arwen behind Aragorn's back?
Orc 2: No! That can't be true!
Orc 1: Is to, I read it in People.
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Old 07-29-2003, 08:35 PM   #39
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Since when do orcs read People? They're orcs, they would have to read Orc, or something like that.

All right, I'm sorry, that was way lame. *hits head on wall* I'm done now.
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Old 07-30-2003, 02:32 PM   #40
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Sting

HI! Thanks for the compliment Sapphire Flame!
Ya want some more?
Here they are!

They were probably playing The Sims Unleashed on Notlartz's Dell, and downloading Orc and Uruk skins off the Internet so they could make a sort of Sim Virtual Battle! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

OR!

They could all be attempting to build a couch out of random dead Eorlingas so they could sit comfortably while watching Eastenders!

They could ALSO be discussing what the world would be like in a few thousand years (aka Now), and freakily getting it right:
Uruk No 2,197 (Squarkz): Hmmm, well -I- think that all the countries will be split up into all little ones, and all the maidens will wear trousers!

Uruk No 3,333 (Quartz): Yes, maybe! BUT! There will also be really cool weapons used to kill people!

Squarkz: Yea! And one of the countries will be really cool, and all the rest apart from a rare few will be REALLY BORING!

Quartz: What do you think they'll be called?

Squartz: I dunno brother. Something really weird. Like........England, and Scotland. Haha! The Lands of Eng and Scot! Silly future people!


Well! That's it! Hope you liked them! I've just recently been to Japan, and since I've been back, England has become SO BORING!! [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
I miss my friends, I miss the family I stayed with, and more specifically, I miss the really hot 19 year old dude in that family..............
See y'all!
Namarié!
From
Elróthiel, the Insane Elven Goddess of Hilariosity and Laughter!
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Free Your Imagination. Go on. Do a drawing. It'll get you far.
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