Crazy Captions - Page 213 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-22-2005, 02:53 PM

sorry, Morsul, I can't remember. I was just generally wandering around Google Image search and came across it. I copy all my Crazy captions images into Photo bucket before posting them as that means that everyone can see the picture... I think.

Anyway, I digress...

Gloin: Just admit it, Elrond, my hair is better than yours!

OR

Legolas: Look! You are a dwarf!

Gloin: Who's Captain obvious here?

Aragorn: He's a corporal now.

mormegil · 11-22-2005, 02:54 PM

Gloin is obviously past his prime when during the middle of the council he poses the question, "Wait a minute! We are talking about a ring of power? I thought this was all about a spring of powder!"

Mithalwen · 11-22-2005, 03:06 PM

The actor playing Gloin is stunned when after spending 3 weeks in make-up he is told that his part is reduced to sitting silently in a chair.

"But the cosy chat at the feast with Frodo, the speech at the council..."

"gone,gone, gone..."

Formendacil · 11-22-2005, 04:50 PM

This is why Saruman had to turn to evil: to forestall getting fat and braiding his beard most unbecomingly.

malkatoj · 11-22-2005, 05:26 PM

*decides the picture is actually Gandalf*

Gandalf: This is the LAST time I let Gimli do my hair.

OR
*perhaps Legolas?*

Legolas: Hey, Gandalf! Look what you did! I was pretty before you went and uncloaked!

Lhunardawen · 11-22-2005, 06:52 PM

A typical reaction to Elrond's request for a Rivendell Santa.

luthien-elvenprincess · 11-22-2005, 07:31 PM

(Inspired by meela)

Quote:

The world finally learns what a female dwarf looks like, when Gimli brings his mother to the Council.

"This stunning female dwarf, dressed as "Heidi", celebrates our Swiss friends in this year's Festival of Harmonious International Relationships."

The Only Real Estel · 11-22-2005, 10:30 PM

Middle-Earth Celebrity Jeopardy
----------------------------------------

Sean Connery: "It's been a long time, Trebek..."

Trebek: "As evidenced by your beard, if that's what you call it."

Sean Connery: "Inspired by your mother, Trebek, inspired by your mother."

Maeggaladiel · 11-22-2005, 10:37 PM

Elrond thought his disguise was perfect, but there was something about the eyebrows that always gave him away...

OR

ZZ Top's lesser-known guitarist.

Gurthang · 11-22-2005, 11:31 PM

Rivendel decided to hire a real dwarf to play Santa this year, mainly so he would have a real beard. To their great surprise, the dwarf shows up with a fake beard!
Dwarf: "Hey, you can't play Santa without a fake beard!"

OR

This is Gandalf on a not-good-but-not-bad hair day. You don't even want to think about what a truly bad hair day looks like.

OR

PJ awakens to find that a disgruntled actor has glued a beard to his face.

OR

Dwarf: "Hair-cut? What's a hair-cut?"

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-23-2005, 12:56 AM

Bilbo: That gloin! The first time I clapped eyes on the little fellow bobbing and puffing on the mat, I had my doubts! He looks more like a grocer than a warrior!

Gloin: Eh? What? Sorry, But I am a grocer now.

Lalwendë · 11-23-2005, 03:31 AM

Gloin winces with every movement he makes, as he realises he has accidentally caught up some of his abundant chest hair into his beard braid.

Anguirel · 11-23-2005, 12:35 PM

In one of his fiendishly cunning disguises, Ugluk gatecrashes the Council of Elrond...

UGLUK: (adjusting false beard) Give Ring to Saruman! He is both Wise and Powerful! I command!

Or

There was an old Dwarf with a beard
Who said, "It is just as I feared!
An Elf and two men
Four hobbits and then
A Wizard, have styled my beard!"

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 11-23-2005, 03:21 PM

"Urrrr!!! Blasted Hobbits, interrupting the Council. I'm so angry!!!"

mormegil · 11-23-2005, 06:21 PM

Gloin: WHAT!?!? I thought this council was a catered affair.

Gurthang · 11-23-2005, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mormegil

Gloin: WHAT!?!? I thought this council was a catered affair.

Disgruntled Dwarf dials Dominos for double decker pizza.

OR

Gloin: "Fuzzy bunnies? GRRR! I can't be angry under these conditions!"

Holbytlass · 11-23-2005, 07:55 PM

This what I think *insert name* looks like. (a post from 'how do you imagine other BDers)

-Yay, Anguriel, a lymerick!

littlemanpoet · 11-23-2005, 09:21 PM

My first attempt, so please be gracious ...

Gloin: "I am smiling."

Fordim Hedgethistle · 11-23-2005, 10:03 PM

Gloin: All Elves arrrre stoopid prrrrrats. Neow someone give me a tankarrrd of ale.

*Gloin then farts, belches and slips on a banana peel*

Legolas (off-screen): Behold! Gloin has farted, belched and slipped on a banana peel!

Ordimor · 11-23-2005, 10:11 PM

What do you mean a "house" fell on my sister?????

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-24-2005, 12:55 AM

The stink of Aragorn turned Gimli's beard white.

OR

Gloin: Why do you want to go around with that Legolas?

Gimli: He makes me look intelligent.

Gloin: Fare enough.

Lhunardawen · 11-24-2005, 02:48 AM

Gandalf has declared war against scissors, shears, and stuff like that.

Gurthang · 11-24-2005, 09:23 AM

Gloin: "Now, where did I put my eyebrows."

OR

Gimli's alter ego, Gimla! Notice the died hair and braided beard? Sure signs of cross-dressing!

OR

"...I left my body standing somewhere in the sands of time."
Gloin: "Yes, ahem, where is my body, exactly?"

OR

Gloin: "What most people don't realize about the beard is that you can hide your pipeweed in here!"

The Only Real Estel · 11-24-2005, 02:41 PM

The Pilgrims started a tradition when they sat down nervously to eat with uncivilized savages...a tradition we continue today as we dine with our relatives & in-laws. This particular picture is one that Hookbill found of *insert Downer's name*'s mother-in-law.

The Only Real Estel · 11-24-2005, 03:41 PM

One day while looking in the mirror, Cher finally realized it was time to hang it up.

The Elf-warrior · 11-24-2005, 08:54 PM

Gloin endures Elrond's rambling.

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-25-2005, 12:42 AM

Gloin saw the one thing he did not expect in Rivendel; Break-dancing Orcs.

OR

Gloin didn't really expect Elrond to get the whole council to join in the 'hockey-kockey' (I don't know if that is how you spell it)

OR yet

Gloin: Well, despite Gandalf uncloaking, Elrond dancing and Legolas pointing out the obvious, Rivendel isn't as bad as it was last time I was here. *Hears Tra-la-la-lally* I take it back. It's worse.

Holbytlass · 11-25-2005, 07:06 AM

Gloin: Relax?! I am relaxed!

The Only Real Estel · 11-25-2005, 01:50 PM

101 things a former celeb would never say
--------------------------------------------------------------

Michael Jackson: "My God. What have I done?"

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-25-2005, 01:52 PM

Famous last words:

Gloin: How dangerous can a snake be? It doesn’t have any legs!

Kath · 11-25-2005, 02:00 PM

Gloin: Oh no! My eyebrows are getting closer and closer together!

Gandalf_the _white · 11-25-2005, 05:07 PM

Dumbledore accidentially stumbles upon the council of Elrond

Gurthang · 11-26-2005, 02:01 AM

Gloin has been offered a choice: a stockpile of gold, or a succulent(sp) feast. Hmm.... choices, choices, choices.

OR

A hobbit?! Looks like a footstool to me.

OR

Rip Van Gandalf.

Holbytlass · 11-26-2005, 06:23 AM

Gloin stepping into a salon, "Yes, I'd like some extentions, please."

mormegil · 11-26-2005, 11:10 AM

Gloin: Eh! What's this lad doing? Why does he think he's so funny by replacing me?

Bilbo decided a new security system was in order so his things didn't "disappear" during this party.

Or

At the Spa of Bywater
Merry: What! This is the mangers special? I was expecting something a bit more relaxing.

Or

Farmer Maggots had spent too much time with Saruman and decided to create his own hybrid, he crossed Ents with his dogs and sent them to guard his crops from hobbits that would steal his mushrooms.

Glirdan · 11-26-2005, 11:14 AM

Bilbo was quite surprised at who the three Werewolves were.

Anguirel · 11-26-2005, 11:17 AM

Poor Bilbo tries unsuccessfully to evade the Bracegirdle sisters at the Michel Delving Annual Ball...

Valesse · 11-26-2005, 12:33 PM

Bilbo and the three trolls decided to make a quartet which rocked Middle Earth until three days after when, mysteriously, the lead vocalist went missing.

In other news Mr. B. Huggins would like to announce his new brand of chili.

OR

Bilbo: But da'rs sh-no blood in my ale, officers!

OR

Bilbo: Imagine it! As far as the eye can see elves that you can squash into lo-carb, high protein, fast acting, muscle growing, arthritis curing, sinus clearing, omega-D carrying, vitamin rich, better-than-your-mother-makes it chili!
Huggins: It's almost too good to be real...*sniff*

Glirdan · 11-26-2005, 12:36 PM

Bilbo chose the wrong door when he was on The Price is Right.

or

Bilbo: Aragorn!?!? Is that you!?!? MAN you need a bath!!!

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-26-2005, 12:39 PM

This is why Bilbo never went to visit the Sack-vill-Bagginses.

OR

Aragorn's family was always eager to supply all the needs of their guests.

11-22-2005, 02:53 PM	#8481
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	sorry, Morsul, I can't remember. I was just generally wandering around Google Image search and came across it. I copy all my Crazy captions images into Photo bucket before posting them as that means that everyone can see the picture... I think. Anyway, I digress... Gloin: Just admit it, Elrond, my hair is better than yours! OR Legolas: Look! You are a dwarf! Gloin: Who's Captain obvious here? Aragorn: He's a corporal now. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-22-2005, 02:54 PM	#8482
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	Gloin is obviously past his prime when during the middle of the council he poses the question, "Wait a minute! We are talking about a ring of power? I thought this was all about a spring of powder!" __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

11-22-2005, 03:06 PM	#8483
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,449	The actor playing Gloin is stunned when after spending 3 weeks in make-up he is told that his part is reduced to sitting silently in a chair. "But the cosy chat at the feast with Frodo, the speech at the council..." "gone,gone, gone..." __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace Last edited by Mithalwen; 11-23-2005 at 02:07 PM.

11-22-2005, 04:50 PM	#8484
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,309	This is why Saruman had to turn to evil: to forestall getting fat and braiding his beard most unbecomingly. __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

11-22-2005, 05:26 PM	#8485
malkatoj Wight Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: A hovel in Florin Posts: 173	decides the picture is actually Gandalf Gandalf: This is the LAST time I let Gimli do my hair. OR perhaps Legolas? Legolas: Hey, Gandalf! Look what you did! I was pretty before you went and uncloaked! __________________ Now, mostly dead is slightly alive. Now, all dead...well, with all dead, there's usually only one thing that you can do--Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

11-22-2005, 06:52 PM	#8486
Lhunardawen Hauntress of the Havens Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IN it, but not OF it Posts: 2,538	A typical reaction to Elrond's request for a Rivendell Santa.

11-22-2005, 10:30 PM	#8488
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	Middle-Earth Celebrity Jeopardy ---------------------------------------- Sean Connery: "It's been a long time, Trebek..." Trebek: "As evidenced by your beard, if that's what you call it." Sean Connery: "Inspired by your mother, Trebek, inspired by your mother."

11-22-2005, 10:37 PM	#8489
Maeggaladiel Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: The end of the world as we know it. I feel fine, incidentally. Posts: 500	Elrond thought his disguise was perfect, but there was something about the eyebrows that always gave him away... OR ZZ Top's lesser-known guitarist. __________________ "Wide ne bith wel," cwaeth se the geheirde on helle hriman.

11-22-2005, 11:31 PM	#8490
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	Rivendel decided to hire a real dwarf to play Santa this year, mainly so he would have a real beard. To their great surprise, the dwarf shows up with a fake beard! Dwarf: "Hey, you can't play Santa without a fake beard!" OR This is Gandalf on a not-good-but-not-bad hair day. You don't even want to think about what a truly bad hair day looks like. OR PJ awakens to find that a disgruntled actor has glued a beard to his face. OR Dwarf: "Hair-cut? What's a hair-cut?" __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

11-23-2005, 12:56 AM	#8491
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Bilbo: That gloin! The first time I clapped eyes on the little fellow bobbing and puffing on the mat, I had my doubts! He looks more like a grocer than a warrior! Gloin: Eh? What? Sorry, But I am a grocer now. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-23-2005, 03:31 AM	#8492
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,737	Gloin winces with every movement he makes, as he realises he has accidentally caught up some of his abundant chest hair into his beard braid. __________________ Gordon's alive!

11-23-2005, 12:35 PM	#8493
Anguirel Byronic Brand Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The 1590s Posts: 2,778	In one of his fiendishly cunning disguises, Ugluk gatecrashes the Council of Elrond... UGLUK: (adjusting false beard) Give Ring to Saruman! He is both Wise and Powerful! I command! Or There was an old Dwarf with a beard Who said, "It is just as I feared! An Elf and two men Four hobbits and then A Wizard, have styled my beard!" __________________ Among the friendly dead, being bad at games did not seem to matter -Il Lupo Fenriso Last edited by Anguirel; 11-23-2005 at 12:39 PM.

11-23-2005, 03:21 PM	#8494
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	"Urrrr!!! Blasted Hobbits, interrupting the Council. I'm so angry!!!" __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

11-23-2005, 06:21 PM	#8495
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	Gloin: WHAT!?!? I thought this council was a catered affair. __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

11-23-2005, 07:55 PM	#8497
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,042	This what I think insert name looks like. (a post from 'how do you imagine other BDers) -Yay, Anguriel, a lymerick! __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

11-23-2005, 09:21 PM	#8498
littlemanpoet Itinerant Songster Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: The Edge of Faerie Posts: 7,066	My first attempt, so please be gracious ... Gloin: "I am smiling."

11-23-2005, 10:03 PM	#8499
Fordim Hedgethistle Gibbering Gibbet Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Beyond cloud nine Posts: 1,844	Gloin: All Elves arrrre stoopid prrrrrats. Neow someone give me a tankarrrd of ale. Gloin then farts, belches and slips on a banana peel Legolas (off-screen): Behold! Gloin has farted, belched and slipped on a banana peel!

11-23-2005, 10:11 PM	#8500
Ordimor Haunting Spirit Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: At the Double-Cross Ranch Posts: 74	What do you mean a "house" fell on my sister????? __________________ *** What would you attempt to do, if you knew you could not fail? ***

11-24-2005, 12:55 AM	#8501
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The stink of Aragorn turned Gimli's beard white. OR Gloin: Why do you want to go around with that Legolas? Gimli: He makes me look intelligent. Gloin: Fare enough. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-24-2005, 02:48 AM	#8502
Lhunardawen Hauntress of the Havens Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IN it, but not OF it Posts: 2,538	Gandalf has declared war against scissors, shears, and stuff like that.

11-24-2005, 09:23 AM	#8503
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	Gloin: "Now, where did I put my eyebrows." OR Gimli's alter ego, Gimla! Notice the died hair and braided beard? Sure signs of cross-dressing! OR "...I left my body standing somewhere in the sands of time." Gloin: "Yes, ahem, where is my body, exactly?" OR Gloin: "What most people don't realize about the beard is that you can hide your pipeweed in here!" __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

11-24-2005, 02:41 PM	#8504
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	The Pilgrims started a tradition when they sat down nervously to eat with uncivilized savages...a tradition we continue today as we dine with our relatives & in-laws. This particular picture is one that Hookbill found of insert Downer's name's mother-in-law.

11-24-2005, 03:41 PM	#8505
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	One day while looking in the mirror, Cher finally realized it was time to hang it up.

11-24-2005, 08:54 PM	#8506
The Elf-warrior Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Virginia. Posts: 952	Gloin endures Elrond's rambling. __________________ Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX.

11-25-2005, 12:42 AM	#8507
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Gloin saw the one thing he did not expect in Rivendel; Break-dancing Orcs. OR Gloin didn't really expect Elrond to get the whole council to join in the 'hockey-kockey' (I don't know if that is how you spell it) OR yet Gloin: Well, despite Gandalf uncloaking, Elrond dancing and Legolas pointing out the obvious, Rivendel isn't as bad as it was last time I was here. Hears Tra-la-la-lally I take it back. It's worse. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-25-2005, 07:06 AM	#8508
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,042	Gloin: Relax?! I am relaxed! __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

11-25-2005, 01:50 PM	#8509
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	101 things a former celeb would never say -------------------------------------------------------------- Michael Jackson: "My God. What have I done?"

11-25-2005, 01:52 PM	#8510
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Famous last words: Gloin: How dangerous can a snake be? It doesn’t have any legs! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-25-2005, 02:00 PM	#8511
Kath Everlasting Whiteness Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Perusing the laminated book of dreams Posts: 4,533	Gloin: Oh no! My eyebrows are getting closer and closer together! __________________ “If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”

11-25-2005, 05:07 PM	#8512
Gandalf_the _white Wight Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: In crazy captions waving an angry fist at the outside world Posts: 155	Dumbledore accidentially stumbles upon the council of Elrond

11-26-2005, 02:01 AM	#8513
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	Gloin has been offered a choice: a stockpile of gold, or a succulent(sp) feast. Hmm.... choices, choices, choices. OR A hobbit?! Looks like a footstool to me. OR Rip Van Gandalf. __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

11-26-2005, 06:23 AM	#8514
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,042	Gloin stepping into a salon, "Yes, I'd like some extentions, please." __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

11-26-2005, 11:10 AM	#8515
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	Gloin: Eh! What's this lad doing? Why does he think he's so funny by replacing me? Bilbo decided a new security system was in order so his things didn't "disappear" during this party. Or At the Spa of Bywater Merry: What! This is the mangers special? I was expecting something a bit more relaxing. Or Farmer Maggots had spent too much time with Saruman and decided to create his own hybrid, he crossed Ents with his dogs and sent them to guard his crops from hobbits that would steal his mushrooms. __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

11-26-2005, 11:14 AM	#8516
Glirdan Energetic Essence Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Where Lark Nor Eagle Ever Flew Posts: 3,285	Bilbo was quite surprised at who the three Werewolves were. __________________ *I'm going to buy you a kitty, I'm going to let you fall in love with the kitty, and one cold, winter night, I'm going to steal into your house and punch you in the face!* Fenris Wolf

11-26-2005, 11:17 AM	#8517
Anguirel Byronic Brand Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The 1590s Posts: 2,778	Poor Bilbo tries unsuccessfully to evade the Bracegirdle sisters at the Michel Delving Annual Ball... __________________ Among the friendly dead, being bad at games did not seem to matter -Il Lupo Fenriso