Crazy Captions - Page 196 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 10-14-2005, 10:42 AM

Those 5 army visions haunted Bilbo's old age...

(Wait: that's not funny!)

CaptainofDespair · 10-14-2005, 01:39 PM

Bilbo was a sad sort of hobbit. No one understood him anymore. Even Frodo and Gandalf couldn't understand the tortuous life he was living. No, it was his time now. He had to tell them, all of them. He had beheld the power of cheese, and he could resist the addiction no longer...

Hookbill the Goomba · 10-14-2005, 01:50 PM

Bilbo: AH! A new picture!

Gandalf is told to sit in the corner and think about what he did.

Gandalf: I only uncloaked once... twice... a few times.

OR

Gandalf is about to get the high score on TETRIS, but Minas Tirith is about to fall!

Glirdan · 10-14-2005, 02:03 PM

Gandalf: So this is how MapQuest works. I don't like it!!! It tells lies!!! Lies I tell you!!!!

Gurthang · 10-14-2005, 02:04 PM

Gandalf's wife told him to wait outside the mall entrance until she came out. He's been sitting there for three days.

OR

After Butters the Squirrel stole all of his money, Gandalf was reduced to beg for a living.

OR

Gandalf sits down to relax on one of Minas Tirith's vibrating sitting rocks.

OR

Gandalf: "I cannot understand these directions. There's no Ecthelion Street here! Ohh! I hate MapQuest!"

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 10-14-2005, 02:09 PM

No-one could be quite sure just what Gandalf did on the seedy backstreets of Minas Tirith.

Kitanna · 10-14-2005, 02:14 PM

After rough housing with Denethor Gandalf is put in a time out.

or

Gandalf tries to find his happy place.

Boromir88 · 10-14-2005, 02:34 PM

In an act of Revenge Gandalf uses Denethor's flower pot as a toilet.

CaptainofDespair · 10-14-2005, 04:06 PM

Gandalf is on guard duty, as Pippin is...elsewhere...

Gandalf: Pippin, your smoking is quite obvious...

mormegil · 10-14-2005, 04:23 PM

Gandalf always found it important to update his memoirs

"It was in the nick-of-time that I arrived at Gondor, had I not arrived their destruction would have been certain. Now my arrival to Gondor was frought with danger, I overcame multiple Nazgul attacks and survived the inane chatter of a hobbit....In conclusion M-e is better with me and that is why I uncloaked."

luthien-elvenprincess · 10-14-2005, 04:26 PM

Gandalf was determined to be first in line at opening time at the "Red-Hot-Buy-One-Get-One-Free" sale at Sizzle's Fireworks Emporium & Donut-Hole Factory.

mormegil · 10-14-2005, 04:33 PM

Sir Ian showed up to wait in line for the premier of The Fellowship of the Ring dressed up and a bit too early.

(ah the memories of waiting all day to see it)

Kath · 10-14-2005, 05:13 PM

Gandalf is put on the naughty step.

Gothmog · 10-14-2005, 05:19 PM

While Gandalf took a nap on a calm back yard, the battle of Minas Tirith was lost.

OR

Gandalf: You see little mouse, everybody is important in a great city like this!

OR

Gandalf: I'm never allowed to play with the others. This isn't fair. I want, I want, I WANT to play hide and seek

OR

Gandalf: I could have become evil, travelled east to never return or go crazy and talk only to birds, but here I am stuck with these whining hobbits, rude dwarfes, greedy men and oh so neat elves. Manwe give me strenght...

The Only Real Estel · 10-14-2005, 06:09 PM

Gandalf: "Sigh, I can't stand this. All this tiptoeing around Denethor with little "half-truths" is making my nose grow!"

Oddwen · 10-14-2005, 07:34 PM

Gandalf writes a letter.

Dear Radagast: I hope this letter finds you well. Many are the strange tides in the fortunes of the world, and the hands of the small work wonders in the cracks where large hands cannot, the wise wonder and the foolish folk act, while the crow flies a hundred miles as the deer runs, and the pools at the end of streams grow ever deeper...

Or...

Gandalf sneaks a moment to cwy.

Or...

Gandalf sits and ponders Life, the Universe, and Everything.

Or...

"Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to guard a Halfling..."

Beanamir of Gondor · 10-14-2005, 07:55 PM

Gandalf, totally bored with the Siege of Gondor, decides to actually watch cement dry in Minas Tirith.

or

Gandalf, totally bored with the Siege of Gondor, has a staring contest with a box.

The Only Real Estel · 10-14-2005, 09:07 PM

In trouble for stealing Denethor's shrinking/sorcerer potion, Gandalf was now generally referred to as a small medium at large.

The Elf-warrior · 10-14-2005, 09:21 PM

Dear diary, I had almost forgotten why I hate Denethor so much but todays visit brought it all back to me, the arrogant pride, the sneakiness, the self-righteous hypocrisy, the odor of obstentious authority, the underhanded grilling, the veiled insults, the total lack of respect of my status as a Wizard, the total disdain for Aragorn, the clinging on to power, the complete contempt for his oath as Steward, and now something new, using his grief as a cloak to advance his personal agenda! It makes me so mad I want to punch him with my staff!

Your long-suffering servant,

Gandalf

Boromir88 · 10-14-2005, 09:48 PM

Gandalf: 4...8...15...16...23...42

Hookbill the Goomba · 10-15-2005, 12:43 AM

Gandalf: If my calculations are correct, the flaming Denathor should land here, right about... ... now!

OR

Gandalf wonders where that mysterious passage leads. He is horrified to find that it's Denathor's collection of Gandalf the grey uncloaked pictures.

Gothmog · 10-15-2005, 03:34 AM

Aragorn from inside: No more Miruvor for you Gandy... And don't come back in here before you've sobered up!

Gandalf (whiter than usually): Ohhhhh....my head....it's spinning......ohhhh

The Only Real Estel · 10-15-2005, 06:36 AM

Apparently someone is taking being left out of phantom's WW game quite personally...

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 10-15-2005, 07:01 AM

"Pippin! My new mobile phone has V-Rally on it!"

Hookbill the Goomba · 10-15-2005, 11:16 AM

Gandalf: I miss my hat.

Glirdan · 10-15-2005, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Gandalf tries to find his happy place.

Unfortunately, his happy place had something to do with a plantiri!!

or

Sir Ian: Wow!! That game version of me is so much cooler!!! No wonder I got fired....

Lalwendë · 10-15-2005, 12:31 PM

Battle rages on without Gandalf as he hides in a corner with his new Sudoku book.

OR

Gandalf: "Harumph. I don't think much of the range in the Autumn Argos catalogue. Not a single pipe, and only one staff!"

OR

Gandalf had been waiting so long for the 07.25 to Osgiliath that he had fallen asleep.

Mithalwen · 10-15-2005, 12:43 PM

Gandalf begins to realise that his blind date isn't going to show up.....

".. I know I said Rath Celerdain at seven and I would be the one in white with a staff and a sword and she would carry a red rose and a copy of the "Daily Palantir" ..... maybe she has had an accident......."

Hookbill the Goomba · 10-15-2005, 01:09 PM

Pippin: Hay, my horoscope says I'm going to find great riches today!

Gandalf: I wouldn’t' listen to that horoscope.

Pippin: Oh, don't you believe in all that?

Gandalf: It’s not that, it's just Saruman writes those.

Pippin: Here is yours Gandalf, 'You are an old coot and wear a stupid hat and you should be ashamed of yourself!'

Gil-Galad · 10-15-2005, 01:29 PM

"So lonely...oh so Lonely...nobody here besides me..."

THE Ka · 10-15-2005, 06:51 PM

As usual, even the most energetic of the Gandalf can be seen taking in their favourite past time, the search of the meaning of Romanesque and empty poultry cages...

~ Aesthete

Lhunardawen · 10-16-2005, 06:22 AM

As a token of *ehem* peace, the Steward gave his fellow steward a throne.

The Only Real Estel · 10-17-2005, 07:54 PM

Gandalf lonesomely waited outside his nearest video store for the arrival of Star Wars: Episode 3 on DVD. (which seems to be dragging...)

Gil-Galad · 10-17-2005, 10:21 PM

Gandalf has been in the wrong line for the Star Wars movie for 6 months now

Gurthang · 10-17-2005, 10:31 PM

Gandalf is pouting because he died... And for what? Not even a new sword! All he got was a crummy white stick!

mormegil · 10-17-2005, 10:38 PM

The two shirriffs discuss some recent events.

Gandalf: I was certain that both Gimli and Legolas were wolves but then when Gimli began to turn on Leggy it made me rethink it

Theoden: Yes, I agree though I think Sam is our seer!

or

Gandalf: Do you wear boxers or briefs?

Theoden: Why?

Gandalf: As I said I come to bring council in your dire peril.

Gurthang · 10-17-2005, 11:05 PM

Theoden decides to join Gandalf in his pouting.

OR

Theoden: "If you even think about it..."
Gandalf(trying to look innocent): "Whatever do you mean?"
Theoden: "You know of what I speak."

OR

Theoden(thinking): *Gasp!* He touched my throne! With that filthy, grimy hand he touched my throne!

OR

Gandalf: "Are you asleep?"
Theoden: "Quiet! I'm meditating."

Hookbill the Goomba · 10-18-2005, 12:04 AM

Gandalf and Théoden have a staring competition to decide who gets the last Jaffa cake! A worthy contest!

OR

Gandalf: Do you like my cloak?

Théoden *nervously*: ...y-y- yes?

Gandalf: Then take it!

OR

Gandalf: Do you like my cloak?

Théoden *nervously*: ...n-n- no?

Gandalf: Then I'll take it off!

Sometimes you just can't win.

Orominuialwen · 10-18-2005, 12:27 AM

Gandalf: So Theoden, could you please explain to me the functions of a cell membrane?

Theoden: Can't think...too early in morning...try me again in four hours...zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Gothmog · 10-18-2005, 12:36 AM

Theoden: WHAT are you doing?
Gandalf: Nice horsie... don't be afraid of the bad angry man...

OR

Gandalf to himself: Everybody talks about the White Three of Gondor. Wonder if he's one of the other two?

OR

Gandalf: From this view then? Or was it better in profile?
Theoden: I'm sorry Gandalf but your nose still looks to big to me...

10-14-2005, 10:42 AM	#7801
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	Those 5 army visions haunted Bilbo's old age... (Wait: that's not funny!) __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

10-14-2005, 01:50 PM	#7803
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Bilbo: AH! A new picture! Gandalf is told to sit in the corner and think about what he did. Gandalf: I only uncloaked once... twice... a few times. OR Gandalf is about to get the high score on TETRIS, but Minas Tirith is about to fall! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

10-14-2005, 02:03 PM	#7804
Glirdan Energetic Essence Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Where Lark Nor Eagle Ever Flew Posts: 3,285	Gandalf: So this is how MapQuest works. I don't like it!!! It tells lies!!! Lies I tell you!!!! __________________ *I'm going to buy you a kitty, I'm going to let you fall in love with the kitty, and one cold, winter night, I'm going to steal into your house and punch you in the face!* Fenris Wolf

10-14-2005, 02:04 PM	#7805
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	Gandalf's wife told him to wait outside the mall entrance until she came out. He's been sitting there for three days. OR After Butters the Squirrel stole all of his money, Gandalf was reduced to beg for a living. OR Gandalf sits down to relax on one of Minas Tirith's vibrating sitting rocks. OR Gandalf: "I cannot understand these directions. There's no Ecthelion Street here! Ohh! I hate MapQuest!" __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

10-14-2005, 02:09 PM	#7806
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	No-one could be quite sure just what Gandalf did on the seedy backstreets of Minas Tirith. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

10-14-2005, 01:39 PM	#7802
CaptainofDespair Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 413	Bilbo was a sad sort of hobbit. No one understood him anymore. Even Frodo and Gandalf couldn't understand the tortuous life he was living. No, it was his time now. He had to tell them, all of them. He had beheld the power of cheese, and he could resist the addiction no longer...

10-14-2005, 02:14 PM	#7807
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,132	After rough housing with Denethor Gandalf is put in a time out. or Gandalf tries to find his happy place. __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

10-14-2005, 02:34 PM	#7808
Boromir88 Laconic Loreman Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: USA Posts: 7,507	In an act of Revenge Gandalf uses Denethor's flower pot as a toilet. __________________ Fenris Penguin

10-14-2005, 04:06 PM	#7809
CaptainofDespair Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 413	Gandalf is on guard duty, as Pippin is...elsewhere... Gandalf: Pippin, your smoking is quite obvious...

10-14-2005, 04:23 PM	#7810
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	Gandalf always found it important to update his memoirs "It was in the nick-of-time that I arrived at Gondor, had I not arrived their destruction would have been certain. Now my arrival to Gondor was frought with danger, I overcame multiple Nazgul attacks and survived the inane chatter of a hobbit....In conclusion M-e is better with me and that is why I uncloaked." __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

10-14-2005, 04:26 PM	#7811
luthien-elvenprincess Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: what are you doing here? did you come here to eat my popcorn? Posts: 1,031	Gandalf was determined to be first in line at opening time at the "Red-Hot-Buy-One-Get-One-Free" sale at Sizzle's Fireworks Emporium & Donut-Hole Factory. __________________ York Peppermint Patties taste better than Pearson's Peppermint Patties! But, Junior Mints are the best!

10-14-2005, 04:33 PM	#7812
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	Sir Ian showed up to wait in line for the premier of The Fellowship of the Ring dressed up and a bit too early. (ah the memories of waiting all day to see it) __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

10-14-2005, 05:13 PM	#7813
Kath Everlasting Whiteness Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Perusing the laminated book of dreams Posts: 4,533	Gandalf is put on the naughty step. __________________ “If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”

10-14-2005, 05:19 PM	#7814
Gothmog Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Where I lay my head is home Posts: 421	While Gandalf took a nap on a calm back yard, the battle of Minas Tirith was lost. OR Gandalf: You see little mouse, everybody is important in a great city like this! OR Gandalf: I'm never allowed to play with the others. This isn't fair. I want, I want, I WANT to play hide and seek OR Gandalf: I could have become evil, travelled east to never return or go crazy and talk only to birds, but here I am stuck with these whining hobbits, rude dwarfes, greedy men and oh so neat elves. Manwe give me strenght... __________________ Three switched witches watch three Swatch watch switches. Which switched witch watch which Swatch watch switch? He who breaks a thing to find out what it is has left the path of wisdom ~Lurker...

10-14-2005, 06:09 PM	#7815
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	Gandalf: "Sigh, I can't stand this. All this tiptoeing around Denethor with little "half-truths" is making my nose grow!"

10-14-2005, 07:34 PM	#7816
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,126	Gandalf writes a letter. Dear Radagast: I hope this letter finds you well. Many are the strange tides in the fortunes of the world, and the hands of the small work wonders in the cracks where large hands cannot, the wise wonder and the foolish folk act, while the crow flies a hundred miles as the deer runs, and the pools at the end of streams grow ever deeper... Or... Gandalf sneaks a moment to cwy. Or... Gandalf sits and ponders Life, the Universe, and Everything. Or... "Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to guard a Halfling..." __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

10-14-2005, 07:55 PM	#7817
Beanamir of Gondor Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: the Shadow Gallery Posts: 276	Gandalf, totally bored with the Siege of Gondor, decides to actually watch cement dry in Minas Tirith. or Gandalf, totally bored with the Siege of Gondor, has a staring contest with a box. __________________ The answer to life is no longer 42. It's 4 8 15 16 23... 42. "I only lent you my body; you lent me your dream."

10-14-2005, 09:07 PM	#7818
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	Gandalf in hiding In trouble for stealing Denethor's shrinking/sorcerer potion, Gandalf was now generally referred to as a small medium at large.

10-14-2005, 09:21 PM	#7819
The Elf-warrior Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Virginia. Posts: 952	Dear diary, I had almost forgotten why I hate Denethor so much but todays visit brought it all back to me, the arrogant pride, the sneakiness, the self-righteous hypocrisy, the odor of obstentious authority, the underhanded grilling, the veiled insults, the total lack of respect of my status as a Wizard, the total disdain for Aragorn, the clinging on to power, the complete contempt for his oath as Steward, and now something new, using his grief as a cloak to advance his personal agenda! It makes me so mad I want to punch him with my staff! Your long-suffering servant, Gandalf __________________ Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX.

10-14-2005, 09:48 PM	#7820
Boromir88 Laconic Loreman Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: USA Posts: 7,507	To master Perky... Gandalf: 4...8...15...16...23...42 __________________ Fenris Penguin

10-15-2005, 12:43 AM	#7821
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Gandalf: If my calculations are correct, the flaming Denathor should land here, right about... ... now! OR Gandalf wonders where that mysterious passage leads. He is horrified to find that it's Denathor's collection of Gandalf the grey uncloaked pictures. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

10-15-2005, 03:34 AM	#7822
Gothmog Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Where I lay my head is home Posts: 421	Aragorn from inside: No more Miruvor for you Gandy... And don't come back in here before you've sobered up! Gandalf (whiter than usually): Ohhhhh....my head....it's spinning......ohhhh __________________ Three switched witches watch three Swatch watch switches. Which switched witch watch which Swatch watch switch? He who breaks a thing to find out what it is has left the path of wisdom ~Lurker...

10-15-2005, 06:36 AM	#7823
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	Pouty Gandy Apparently someone is taking being left out of phantom's WW game quite personally...

10-15-2005, 07:01 AM	#7824
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	"Pippin! My new mobile phone has V-Rally on it!" __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

10-15-2005, 11:16 AM	#7825
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Gandalf: I miss my hat. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

10-15-2005, 12:31 PM	#7827
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,737	Battle rages on without Gandalf as he hides in a corner with his new Sudoku book. OR Gandalf: "Harumph. I don't think much of the range in the Autumn Argos catalogue. Not a single pipe, and only one staff!" OR Gandalf had been waiting so long for the 07.25 to Osgiliath that he had fallen asleep. __________________ Gordon's alive!

10-15-2005, 12:43 PM	#7828
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,449	Mature Maia (own horse and teeth) WLTM..... Gandalf begins to realise that his blind date isn't going to show up..... ".. I know I said Rath Celerdain at seven and I would be the one in white with a staff and a sword and she would carry a red rose and a copy of the "Daily Palantir" ..... maybe she has had an accident......." __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace

10-15-2005, 01:09 PM	#7829
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	For all Douglas Adams Fans Pippin: Hay, my horoscope says I'm going to find great riches today! Gandalf: I wouldn’t' listen to that horoscope. Pippin: Oh, don't you believe in all that? Gandalf: It’s not that, it's just Saruman writes those. Pippin: Here is yours Gandalf, 'You are an old coot and wear a stupid hat and you should be ashamed of yourself!' __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

10-15-2005, 01:29 PM	#7830
Gil-Galad Psyche of Prince Immortal Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Above a Parapet Obvious exits are: North, South, and Dennis Posts: 4,733	"So lonely...oh so Lonely...nobody here besides me..." __________________ Love doesn't blow up and get killed.

10-15-2005, 06:51 PM	#7831
THE Ka Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: As with the flygja Posts: 1,403	As usual, even the most energetic of the Gandalf can be seen taking in their favourite past time, the search of the meaning of Romanesque and empty poultry cages... ~ Aesthete __________________ Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni?

10-16-2005, 06:22 AM	#7832
Lhunardawen Hauntress of the Havens Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IN it, but not OF it Posts: 2,538	As a token of ehem peace, the Steward gave his fellow steward a throne.

10-17-2005, 07:54 PM	#7833
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 2,835	Gandalf lonesomely waited outside his nearest video store for the arrival of Star Wars: Episode 3 on DVD. (which seems to be dragging...)

10-17-2005, 10:21 PM	#7834
Gil-Galad Psyche of Prince Immortal Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Above a Parapet Obvious exits are: North, South, and Dennis Posts: 4,733	Gandalf has been in the wrong line for the Star Wars movie for 6 months now __________________ Love doesn't blow up and get killed.

10-17-2005, 10:31 PM	#7835
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	Gandalf is pouting because he died... And for what? Not even a new sword! All he got was a crummy white stick! __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

10-17-2005, 10:38 PM	#7836
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,637	The two shirriffs discuss some recent events. Gandalf: I was certain that both Gimli and Legolas were wolves but then when Gimli began to turn on Leggy it made me rethink it Theoden: Yes, I agree though I think Sam is our seer! or Gandalf: Do you wear boxers or briefs? Theoden: Why? Gandalf: As I said I come to bring council in your dire peril. __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke