An Unexpected Vir(tu)al Party

[The Saucepan Man]

The vir(tu)al party was in full swing and the pleasant hum of friendly conversation filled the Barrow Downs ballroom. The air was thick with the delighted cries (and odd squee) of Downers who had not seen each other in many a year and the excited babble of long lost friends reacquainting themselves with each other.

Suddenly, a discordant sound rang out, cutting through the cheerful chatter, and bringing the delighted discourse to a sudden halt. Just beyond the ballroom door could be heard a dreadful clattering fit to raise the dead, as though a large quantity of metal had been dropped from a great height.

Estelyn rushed to the door, concerned that some great misfortune had befallen the latest guest to arrive. Flinging it open, she was greeted, to her great relief, by the sight of a pile of cooking vessels heaped in the passage beyond. Relief because she quickly remembered that this was in fact the customary manner of arrival of said latest guest.

Slowly, a wizened face emerged from under a large cooking pot and flashed a broad smile.

“Thank you for the invitation, Esty”, said the Saucepan Man with a twinkle in his eyes. “Sorry I’m late. Strange place to leave a banana, though!”

“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes, Esspiem,” cried Estelyn cried in delight.

“More pies? Well I haven’t had any yet, but I am happy to try whatever’s going,” replied the Saucepan Man. His hearing, impaired as ever by the clatter of his pans, had not improved with age.

Slowly, the Saucepan Man picked himself up from the ground. He was, as always, covered from head to toe in cooking pots, frying pans and kettles, and a shiny saucepan sat atop his head. He was sporting his finest kitchenwear, dug out especially for the party, although it had still seen better days and was slightly rusted with age.

“Wonderful to see you, my dear,” he said fondly, as he made to give Esty an affectionate hug. “It’s been a long time.”

It had indeed been a long time. Many years had passed since the Saucepan Man had last clattered noisily through the Downs, not all of them happy. But the familiar black and green glow of the place, the sight of Esty in her festive red finery and the pleasant hum of intelligent discourse, once more resuming after his cacophonous interruption, reminded him of the wonderful times that he had once spent here.

Esty returned the hug as best she could, given the bulky and somewhat jagged nature of his attire.

“Come on, let’s get you inside,” she said, raising her eyes in mock exasperation.

[Lhunardawen]

“It’s like the Red Arrow,” whispered Lhuna, staring at her computer screen, as one who receives a summons long expected and yet dreadful when it comes. She trembled. It had indeed come to that, as she had predicted. Had it been entirely up to her, she would have heeded the call with all the strength and speed she could muster, but there were other factors to consider. A comrade in arms counselled her to wait until the stores of personal protective equipment were adequate, and the siege was better under control. She, in turn, decided to start sharpening her best weapon. Long had her mind — and stethoscope — been idle.

In the midst, however, of studying the local clinical practice guidelines for COVID-19 management, her concentration began to waver. Before long she found herself wandering along long-forgotten halls; dark they were, but with a tinge of mint green light that seemed to emanate from no particular source. As she walked, a musty scent filled her nostrils, making her sneeze. She was careful to cover her mouth with the crook of her elbow, as health authorities advised. The sound echoed faintly in the empty hallway.

At the end of a hallway there was an elaborate door from which came a steady hum of voices, some oddly familiar, as though she had encountered them often in years past but had since been absent, some entirely unknown, all filled with excitement. Lhuna found herself drawn to the sound. She started pacing towards a glitter near the slightly ajar door, which revealed itself to be a frying pan reflecting sunlight from the room inside. “What’s a pan doing here?” She picked it up, wiped it with a piece of tissue soaked with 75% isopropyl alcohol, a bottle of which she always brought everywhere she went. She also poured a generous helping of alcohol on her palms and rubbed them briskly together, as she had done countless times. She then peered cautiously through the door.

“Downers!”

Lhuna had not said the word in years, yet was surprised at the ease with which it escaped through her lips. “I must have fallen asleep reading that CPG. But if this is a dream, I hope I don’t wake up yet.” She stepped inside soundlessly, and walked along the wall to keep herself inconspicuous. She had not seen or heard from any of them in ages (her own fault, she had disappeared even from Facebook) and she was not certain they would remember her. She looked at the familiar faces and, as was her wont, gave herself a few seconds before each one brought to mind a name, and a particular memory. She saw a walking pile of pots and pans (“SpM! I must remember to give this pan back to him”) speaking to a long-haired woman with her back towards her (“Esty! I’d recognise Princess Fiona’s hair from anywhere. I wonder if she remembers swooning over Aragorn”). She realised she was not up for socialising just yet.

She saw Elempi sitting in a corner and knew he would not mind quiet company. Lhuna made her way to his corner and sat gently on the seat beside him, before turning to face him and answering his wide-eyed look with a huge smile.

[Envinyatar]

Soap and water! And an actual towel to with which to wipe hands dry!!
It had been a long stretch since he’d been near to any sort of civilized establishment, much less around a roomful of people all got up in their partying finery. He washed his hands carefully, enjoying the warmish water and the subtle fragrance of the soap - the softness of the towel against his rough worn hands. There had been some kind of sickness, he’d heard, that was moving through the more settled placed in the lands.
People were taking care not to catch it.

For his part, he’d been far away from cities and towns of late – traveling through the forests along the feet of the Grey Mountains. By chance he’d heard from some old fellow traveler that there was to be a party of sorts back at the Barrow-Downs. He wondered if any old friends would be there.

He glanced about as he walked into the large room.

[Snowdog]

"Gah! Leave it to me to be late to the party. I was yet again off rangering and maybe got a little pre-loaded at the inn over on another board."

I walk over to see if there is any ale left to be had. "I did catch your words there Mith... many have come and many have gone. Like you I remembered searching out the webz for the boards in 1999 & 2000, and remember coming to Barrow Downs when it was on EZ Boards using my global account. I never seemed to stay long in one place and I think I could guess which boards you mean by your descriptions."

Snowdog turned and saw that Estelyn was tapping a frothy mug of the finest ale from the Shire, brewed by that Hobbit masterbrewer Harry Largebarrell of Oatbarton in the North Farthing. Rumour had it he made both the Green Dragon house ale and the deep amber of the East Farthing sold at The Golden Perch.

"Woo! Some ale remains! Thanks much for the tankard!" The rather unkempt ranger took a long draw from the flagon and set it down. "Yes... i likely have spanned all yhose eras that Mithedan mentioned, but being I managed to accumulate five hundred some posts in that time, one can see I was elsewhere much of the time. My early years were spent on The One Ring dot com, but after a couple years I managed to get banned mainly due to marriage-politics. Then the White City was a place I was a regular until it become a ghost of itself.

Anyway, always loved The Barrow Downs as it was where true Tolkien types were, being the Barrow Downs weren't in the PJ fanfix. I just yesterday re-discovered my Barrow Downs t-shirt, along with my Minas Tirith t-shirt and Tolkien Forums t-shirt. I had a Barrow Downs mug for a number of years but lost it somewhere in a move.

What a list Mithadan! I met Lush here and still stay in touch with her and her journalistic work! I recognise a couple other names there as well. Nice party!"

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

A dim figure, small and unobtrusive, cloaked so close about that he was hardly visible, sate in the corner quietly sipping a fine mug of ale. Pulling the pipe from his mouth and blowing out a magnificent ring he raised the smoking instrument above his head as though in salute, or acknowledgement.

"To friends long ignored," he said, "but often in my thoughts."

Dropping the hand which had held the pipe aloft to the table, he busied himself with knocking out the ash and cleaning the instrument before putting it away. Then taking up his mug he sipped another contemplative sip of ale before putting it back in its place too, then assumed an air of one about to speak wisdom. The gathered dignitaries fell silent, and into that great quiet expectancy the figure spoke one last time:

"In days such as these, we must needs all remember: be kind to one another, for there's more good in the world than evil, and faith in that -- though long in being rewarded -- is sure." And so saying he fell silent, and those who listened thought that he was done. But just as they turned away, from the dark corner the voice added: "And floss. Always remember to floss."

[Snowdog]

*Gets another ale*

And among the tshirts I re-discovered is my December 2001 Spokane Riverside Theater Trilogy Tuesday shirt! a marathon EE Fellowship, EE Two Towers, and premiere at midnight of Return of the King!

Since a new lockdown was announced here in Melbourne I guess I'm forced to stay at the party....