The Ruin of Beleriand and the Fall of Fingolfin

[Findegil]

Part four of the text:

Of the Swarthy Men
§150 To Men Morgoth feigned pity, if any would hearken to his messages, saying that their woes came only of their servitude to the rebel {Gnomes}[Elves], but at the hands of the rightful lord of earth they would get honour and a just reward of valour, if they would leave rebellion. ...
§151 RB-SM-01 <GA {the}The Swarthy Men came out of Eriador, and passing north about the Eryd Luin entered into Lothlann. Their coming was not wholly unlookedfor, since the Dwarves had warned {Maidros}[Maeðros] that hosts of Men out of the further East were journeying towards Beleriand.> Now the Easterlings or Romenildi, as the Elves named these newcomers, were short and broad, long and strong in the arm; their hair was black, and grew much also upon their face and breast; their skins were swart or sallow, and their eyes brown RB-SM-02 {; yet their countenances were for the most part not uncomely, though some were grim and fierce. Their houses and tribes were many, and some had greater liking for the {Dwarfs}[Dwarves] of the mountains than for the Elves. But the sons of Fëanor, seeing the weakness of the Noldor, and the growing power of the armies of Morgoth, made alliances with these men, and gave their friendship to the greatest of their chieftains, Bor and Ulfang.}<GA But they were not all of one kind, in looks or in temper, or in tongue. Some were not uncomely and were fair to deal with; some were grim and ill-favoured and of little trust. Their houses were many, and there was little love among them. They had small liking for the Elves, and for the most part loved rather the Naugrim of the mountains; but they were abashed by the lords of the Noldor, whose like they had not before encountered.
§174 But {Maidros}[Maeðros], knowing the weakness of the Noldor and the Elf-friends, whereas the pits of Angband seemed to hold store inexhaustible and ever renewed, made alliance with these new-come Men, and gave them dwellings both in Lothlann north of the March, and in the lands south of it. Now the two chieftains that had the greatest followings and authority were named Bor and Ulfang.> And Morgoth was well content; for this was as he had designed. The sons of Bor were RB-SM-03 {Borlas and Boromir and Borthandos}<LQ2 Borlad and Borlach and Borthand>RB-SM-04 <GA , and they were goodly men> ; and they followed {Maidros}[Maeðros] and {Maglor}[Maelor], and cheated the hope of Morgoth, and were faithful. The sons of Ulfang the Black were Ulfast and Ulwarth and Uldor the Accursed; and they followed {Cranthir}[Caranthir] and swore allegiance to him, and proved faithless. RB-SM-05 <GA, Version II (It was after thought that the people of Ulfang were already secretly in the service of Morgoth ere they came to Beleriand.)><GA; Version II [Footnote: Not so the people of Bor, who were worthy folk and tillers of the earth. Of them, it is said, came the most ancient of the Men that dwelt in the north of Eriador in the Second Age and {[? read} in{]} after-days.]>
§152 There was small love between the Three Houses and the Swarthy Men; and they met seldom. For the newcomers abode long in East Beleriand; but the people of Hador were shut in Hithlum, and Bëor's house was well nigh destroyed. {Yet}[u]And[/b] RB-SM-06 {Haleth and his men}<LQ2 the People of Haleth> {remained still free; for they had been at first untouched by the northern war, since they} dwelt to the southward in the woods by Sirion.

I will not comment on the changes today, since I am to tired. I think most of them should be selfevident. Beside I would have to dig deep in my mind to find what I thought back when I made these draft. So please start up the discussion when you see a point I missed or a change you find not okay.
Please feel free to disagree with me!

Respectfully
Findegil

[gondowe]

Ok, I was reading your draft. The structure with mine is different because I follow the sequence of Sil77 but in the narrative sense tells the same. I don't think it matters.

Two things, in a first reading, leaving apart the parentage of Orodreth (in my text is the brother of Finrod) I think that is better to place the fled of his wife and sons (including Ereinion, not named Gil-galad yet), with him to Nargothrond when Sauron attacks Minas Tirith.

And why you change the placing of the sentence about Celegorm and Curufin in Nargothrond?

Greetings

[Findegil]

About the flight of Gil-galad with his mother: I think the main diffrence between your version and what I propose here, is that Gil-galad and his mother never came to Nargothrond in my version. They are send to the Havens, when things in the north become dangerous. Thus I avoid having Gil-galad involved in the Fall of Nargothrond, which would mean naming a way of escape for him. It is debateable when Gil-galad recived this name.

About Celegrom and Curufin: My understanding is that the brothers got to Nargothrond only after they had rescued Orodreth retreat from Tolsirion. Therefore I told at first only that they retreated to the West from Aglon.

Respectfully
Findegil

[Aran e-Godhellim]

<GA Then {Inglor}[Finrod] went south to Nargothrond RB-DB-17 <QS , his deep fortress prepared against the evil day>, but Barahir returned to Dorthonion to save what he could of the people of Bëor.> RB-DB-18 <LQ2; Correction to QS But fearing now that all strong places were doomed to fall at last before the might of Morgoth, {he}[Orodreth] sent away his wife{ Meril} to her own folk in Eglorest, and with her went their son, yet an elvenchild, and Gilgalad Starlight he was called for the brightness of his eye.>

Should we not amend the "But" I have underlined to an "And," as the previous sentence not only begins with "but" as well, but also does not lead into the sentence about Orodreth at all?