The Narn i Chîn Húrin: Beleg & Falivirn

[Findegil]

Since Tolkien used casque himself (which is bit strange but true) it is the better word.

For line 188 I have to agree to Aiwendil that 'tauntingly scorned' is the better second half-line. The alliteration has to be at the first sylable with emphasis. Thus 'did' is not that good a the start of the line.

I think we have now a very good alliteritive version which we could use. So I am all the more for using it instat of the prose lines.

Aiwendil worte:

One of them, untitled, is based on part of Gwindor's speech about the river Sirion at Eithel Ivrin, lines 1554-1570 in the Lay. I'm almost tempted to suggest that it was in fact a replacement passage for those lines. We may want to consider using it as such.

I agree that we can simply use this as an replacement. I will give it the editing mark NA-EX-47.55. But what do we make of the three last lines placed within brackets?

About Winter comes to Nargothrond:

Thus NA-RG-95 {Fuilin}[Guilin] and NA-RG-96 {Flinding}[Gwindor] __ {friendship}guest-kindliness showed him, 80
and their halls were his home, __ while high summer
NA-EX-49.03{waned to autumn __ and the western gales
the leaves loosened __ from the labouring boughs;
the feet of the forest __ in fading gold {2085}
and burnished brown __ were buried deeply;
a restless rustle __ down the roofless aisles
sighed and whispered. __ Lo! the Silver Wherry,
the sailing Moon __ with slender mast,
was filled with fires __ as of furnace golden {2090}
whose hold had hoarded __ the heats of summer,
whose shrouds were shaped __ of shining flame
uprising ruddy __ o'er the rim of Evening
by the misty wharves __ on the margin of the world.}<Lay, Endnote {The summer slowly __ in the sad forest
}waned and faded. __ In the west arose
winds that wandered __ over warring seas.
Leaves were loosened __ from labouring boughs:
fallow-gold they fell, __ and the feet buried {5}85
of trees standing __ tall and naked,
rustling restlessly __ down roofless aisles,
shifting and drifting.

__ __ __ __ __ __ __ The shining vessel
of the sailing moon __ with slender mast,
with shrouds shapen __ of shimmering flame, {10}90
uprose ruddy __ on the rim of Evening
by the misty wharves __ on the margin of the world.>
Thus the months fleeted __ and mightily he fared {2095}
in the forest with NA-RG-97 {Flinding}[friends], __ and his fate waited
slumbering a season, __ while he sought for joy 95
the lore learning __ and the league sharing
of the NA-RG-98 {Gnomes}[Noldor] __ renowned of Nargothrond.

The ways of the woods __ he wandered far, {2100}
and the land's secrets __ he learned swiftly
by winter unhindered __ to weathers hardened{,}. 100
NA-EX-49.05{whether snow or sleet __ or slanting rain
from glowering heavens __ grey and sunless
cold and cruel __ was cast to earth, 2105
till the floods were loosed __ and the fallow waters
of sweeping Narog, __ swollen, angry,
were filled with flotsam __ and foaming turbid
passed in tumult; __ or twinkling pale
ice-hung evening __ was opened wide, 2110
a dome of crystal __ o'er the deep silence
of the windless wastes __ and the woods standing
like frozen phantoms __ under flickering stars.}<Lay, Endnote With winding horns __ winter hunted
in the weeping woods, __ wild and ruthless;
sleet came slashing, __ and slanting hail {15}
from glowering heaven __ grey and sunless,
whistling whiplash __ whirled by tempest. 105
The floods were freed __ and fallow waters
sweeping seaward, __ swollen, angry,
filled with flotsam, __ foaming, turbid, {20}
passed in tumult. __ The tempest died.
Frost descended __ from far mountains 110
steel-cold and still. __ Stony-glinting
icehung evening __ was opened wide,
a dome of crystal __ over deep silence, {25}
over windless wastes __ and woods standing
as frozen phantoms __ under flickering stars.> 115
By day or night __ danger needless
he dared and sought for, __ his dread vengeance {2115}
ever seeking unsated __ on the sons of Angband;
yet as winter waxed __ wild and pathless,
and biting blizzards __ the bare faces 120
lashed and tortured __ of the lonely tors
and haggard hilltops, __ in the halls more often {2120}
was he found in fellowship __ with the folk of Narog,
and cunning there added __ in the crafts of hand,
and in subtle mastery __ of song and music 125
and peerless poesy, __ to his proven lore
and wise woodcraft; __ there wondrous tales {2125}
were told to Túrin __ in tongues of gold
in those mansions deep, __ there many a day
to the hearth and halls __ of the haughty king 130
did those friends now fare __ to feast and game,

That's what I thought we could make out of it.

Respectfully
Findegil