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Old 12-25-2006, 10:26 PM   #1
Rikae
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I wish Denethor wasn't such a pyromaniac.

Granted. Now Denethor has a shoe fetish, and eats the Shire out of indignation, resulting in fatal indigestion.

I wish the fox, instead of wondering why hobbits were sleeping under a tree, had taken the ring to Mordor and destroyed it.
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Old 12-26-2006, 03:51 AM   #2
Rune Son of Bjarne
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I wish the fox, instead of wondering why hobbits were sleeping under a tree, had taken the ring to Mordor and destroyed it.

Zimzalazing the fox took the little round thing!

Unfortunately in order to get the ring it had to bite the throats of the hobbits. . .On the way to mount doom the Fox grew in power and soon it was enabled to control all, but men (including hobbits), elves and wizards. All creatures followed its call and raided their way through Middle-earth and left it more devastated than Mordor, so when the ring was finaly the destroyed, it was of no gain as Middle-earth had already been destroyed and left it in worse condition than Sauron in his sweetest dream could ever imagine.

I wish that Ulmo had been the mightiest of the Valar
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Old 12-26-2006, 04:06 AM   #3
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
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I wish that Ulmo had been the mightiest of the Valar
Oh, but he was. Unfortunately, he was also the laziest of the Valar.

I wish Sam had found some Potatoes in Ithilian.
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Old 12-26-2006, 10:25 PM   #4
Kitanna
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Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba
I wish Sam had found some Potatoes in Ithilian.
Granted, but to what ends? Sam does find his lovely taters in Ithilian, however in doing so the whole course of events is completely thrown off. Theoden decides not to have Rohan ride to the aid of Gondor, instead they decide to wait out the storm at Helm's Deep. Faramir never meets up with Frodo and Sam and doesn't return to Minas Tirith. Denethor does nothing, but stew in his tower and not die. Gollum throttles Sam in his sleep and steals the Ring from Frodo, only to have it swallowed by a fish. That fish goes on to become the new Dark Lord. And all that over some potatoes.

I wish Bilbo had taken the Ring into Mordor.
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Old 01-03-2007, 05:41 PM   #5
Valesse
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Originally Posted by Kitanna
I wish Bilbo had taken the Ring into Mordor.
Well of course he did! But... well he -tried-.

The average hobbit can only take so much, you know? After starting his journey out from Hobbiton on his 111st birthday, Bilbo found himself being tracked by an unlikely pack of mistrils with the working title of "Nemoy and the Nem-an-or-ians" (Okay, so thats a stretch) the old hobbit soon got fed up with being the subject to such cantations that he threw the ring at Nemoy in a rage. Subsequently, it bounced off and choked a small horse.

Now having to drag a small horse up the fiery steps of Mt. Doom isn't an easy feat, and needless to say any chances of success were now completely out of the picture without having to stop and... *ahem* do certain things to retreive the ring once more. Just in time for those nasty Nazgul to snatch it from his little hands and run off with it snickering.

I wish the elves of the Last Alliance preformed dazzlingly dangerous kick-line to squash their enemies!
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Old 01-20-2008, 01:41 PM   #6
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
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I wish the elves of the Last Alliance preformed dazzlingly dangerous kick-line to squash their enemies!
It is done. However, they take their new found power and form a mass corporate system that crushes the masses. Some how.

I wish Bilbo would admit he wore a wig.
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Old 01-20-2008, 05:22 PM   #7
Alonna
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I wish Bilbo would admit he wore a wig.
Granted. After admitting that he wears a wig, Bilbo is unfortunately disqualified from the annual Shire beauty pageant.

I wish Faramir had a lightsaber.
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