Survivor: Surviving the Minor Works - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Tuor in Gondolin · 04-12-2006, 08:17 AM

Alcarillo has unwittingly revealed a shocking
bit of bigotry by JRRT, to wit, his anti-large people
agenda. (Fattie Dorkins, Fatty Lumpkin, Fatty Bolger-
the noblest hobbit of them all). But then again
they are his works, so:
+ + Fattie Dorkins

And let's hope there's no elf singing of
Fat people got no right to live.

**The Saucepan Man** · 04-12-2006, 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuor in Gondolin

Alcarillo has unwittingly revealed a shocking bit of bigotry by JRRT, to wit, his anti-large people agenda.

... which you are condoning by voting for the fat one.

+ + MR PARISH

... again. I never liked the chap. He treated Niggle abysmally.

arcticstorm · 04-12-2006, 10:07 AM

He usurped the throne, he was nothing more than the pawn of a dragon!! Why do we need him?

++Ægidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo

Estelyn Telcontar · 04-12-2006, 12:06 PM

1,000 Readers can't be wrong, can they? At any rate, the argument for the

++Sea-serpent

is convincing, and I don't like deep water anyway and certainly not storms at sea - except when they're patchwork patterns!

(Storm at Sea patchwork pattern)

AbercrombieOfRohan · 04-12-2006, 12:44 PM

++King Augustus Bonifacius

He's greedy and lazy. Can someone explain why we're keeping him around?

Alcarillo · 04-12-2006, 01:35 PM

You know, Tuor in Gondolin, I think we're onto something. Just look at the descrimination against Bombur in the Hobbit. When at Beorn's house, Gandalf instructs the dwarves to enter by twos. Listen to what he says to Bombur:

Quote:

Bombur is fattest and will do for two, he had better come alone and last.

Shockingly rude! And in Mirkwood, when crossing the enchanted river, Bombur simply asks not to cross last, and is immediately insulted by Thorin.

Quote:

"I'm always last and I don't like it," said Bombur. "It's somebody else's turn today."

"You should not be so fat."

It is undeniable! Tolkien was against large people!

Diamond18 · 04-13-2006, 01:47 AM

The third round ended late because the moddess forgot all about it, but even this was not enough to save two minor characters:

Fattie Dorkins: 2 votes

The Sea-serpent: 2 votes

Mr. Parish: 1 vote

Farmer Giles: 1 vote

King Augustus: 1 vote

And so, with cries of, "Tolkien was against fat people, and if it's good enough for Tolkien, it's good enough for us!" the judges fed Fattie Dorkins to The Sea-serpent. Then they slaughtered the Sea-serpent and made it into chic purses, boots, belts, watch straps, and hat bands.

Day the Fourth finds 47 remaining contestants:

Farmer Giles of Ham

Ægidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo (Farmer Giles of Ham)
Gram, his dog
The Giant from the Wild Hills
King Augustus Bonifacious
Chrysophylax Dives
The Miller
The Parson
Sunny Sam (Fabricius Cunctator) The Blacksmith

Smith of Wooton Major/Leaf By Niggle

Master Cook Rider
Alf the Prentice, King of Faerie
Nokes
Smith of Wooton Major
Nell
Queen of Faerie
Niggle
Mr. Parish

The Adventures of Tom Bombadil (Poems)

Goldberry
Badger
Old Man Willow
The Barrow-wight
Goodman Maggott
Princess Mee
Fíriel
The Mewlips
Troll

Roverandom

Roverandom
The Wizard Artaxerxes
The Little Boy
Psamothos Psamathides
Mew, the Seagull
Man-in-the-Moon
Moon-dog
Great White Dragon
Mer-dog
Uin, the Whale

Mr. Bliss

Mr. Bliss
Girabbit
Mr. Binks
Mr. Day
Mrs. Knight
Archie
Teddy
Bruno
Albert Dorkins
Herbert Dorkins
Egbert Dorkins
Sergeant Boffin

04-12-2006, 08:17 AM	#1
Tuor in Gondolin Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Southeast Pennsylvania Posts: 3,651	Alcarillo has unwittingly revealed a shocking bit of bigotry by JRRT, to wit, his anti-large people agenda. (Fattie Dorkins, Fatty Lumpkin, Fatty Bolger- the noblest hobbit of them all). But then again they are his works, so: + + Fattie Dorkins And let's hope there's no elf singing of Fat people got no right to live. __________________ The poster formerly known as Tuor of Gondolin. Walking To Rivendell and beyond 12,555 miles passed Nt./Day 5: Pass the beacon on Nardol, the 'Fire Hill.'

04-12-2006, 12:06 PM	#4
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,500	1,000 Readers can't be wrong, can they? At any rate, the argument for the ++Sea-serpent is convincing, and I don't like deep water anyway and certainly not storms at sea - except when they're patchwork patterns! (Storm at Sea patchwork pattern) __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

04-13-2006, 01:47 AM	#7
Diamond18 Eidolon of a Took Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: my own private fantasy world Posts: 3,460	End of Day the Third The third round ended late because the moddess forgot all about it, but even this was not enough to save two minor characters: Fattie Dorkins: 2 votes The Sea-serpent: 2 votes Mr. Parish: 1 vote Farmer Giles: 1 vote King Augustus: 1 vote And so, with cries of, "Tolkien was against fat people, and if it's good enough for Tolkien, it's good enough for us!" the judges fed Fattie Dorkins to The Sea-serpent. Then they slaughtered the Sea-serpent and made it into chic purses, boots, belts, watch straps, and hat bands. Day the Fourth finds 47 remaining contestants: Farmer Giles of Ham Ægidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo (Farmer Giles of Ham) Gram, his dog The Giant from the Wild Hills King Augustus Bonifacious Chrysophylax Dives The Miller The Parson Sunny Sam (Fabricius Cunctator) The Blacksmith Smith of Wooton Major/Leaf By Niggle Master Cook Rider Alf the Prentice, King of Faerie Nokes Smith of Wooton Major Nell Queen of Faerie Niggle Mr. Parish The Adventures of Tom Bombadil (Poems) Goldberry Badger Old Man Willow The Barrow-wight Goodman Maggott Princess Mee Fíriel The Mewlips Troll Roverandom Roverandom The Wizard Artaxerxes The Little Boy Psamothos Psamathides Mew, the Seagull Man-in-the-Moon Moon-dog Great White Dragon Mer-dog Uin, the Whale Mr. Bliss Mr. Bliss Girabbit Mr. Binks Mr. Day Mrs. Knight Archie Teddy Bruno Albert Dorkins Herbert Dorkins Egbert Dorkins Sergeant Boffin __________________ All shall be rather fond of me and suffer from mild depression.

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04-12-2006, 10:07 AM	#3
arcticstorm Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Johnson Bible College: Knoxville, TN Posts: 464	He usurped the throne, he was nothing more than the pawn of a dragon!! Why do we need him? ++Ægidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo

04-12-2006, 12:44 PM	#5
AbercrombieOfRohan Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 311	++King Augustus Bonifacius He's greedy and lazy. Can someone explain why we're keeping him around?