How do you imagine other BDers

[Morai]

I think it's time someone finally added this to their "guess list:"

The Barrow-Wight

• Species: Opii Biggus Shnozolus "The Common Hefty-nosed Penguin"
• Habits most of Antartica, eastern Argentina, though he occasionally hops a cab to slip up to Iowa for a wild weekend
• Diet includes herring, halibut, young sardines, small assorted South Atlantic schooling fish, and Pop Tarts
• Nesting season is in early June. Mating behaivor is mystery since he is a discreet embarrassed animal.
• When he is not feeding or caring for his young, he enjoys skinny-dipping, long hot baths, reminising about the 1960s, foot massages, listening to Moody Blues records until late at night with the lights out.
• Fairly liberal minded, he would be driving an used Volvo if he could reach the pedals.
• I won't mention his pecuilar tastes in television.
• Conclusion: The Hefty Nosed Penguin is gentle, easily influenced, yet not overly sensitive. He has a pleasant dispositon, is generally optimistic, and a welcome member of the Animal Kindom, even though he eats crackers in bed.

I hope you find this more amusing than insulting Mr. Wight.