What do you assign to Mordor?

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

Originally Posted by Lalwendë

But this kind of 'language' is dreamed up by committees of middle class, frustrated graduates who found that their dreams of being the next editor of the Observer were all to end in civil servitude. It is then perpetuated by their underlings who are too afraid to challenge the notion that they are no longer a person, nor even personnel, but simply, and sadly, a 'resource', like a ream of paper or perhaps a box of buff envelopes.

Hey Mithalwen, is this true....?

[Mithalwen]

Originally Posted by Fordim Hedgethistle

Hey Mithalwen, is this true....?

Which bit?

I hate the term Human resources certainly. At least "Personnel" emphasised the person. Human resources make me think of that Dilbert cartoon which says that "we were wrong all the time we said that our employees were our most important resource... paperclips are our most important resource. .."

I suppose to quote the title of one of those books I should have read for my degree "Language change - process or decay?". I would lean to the decay side. I find soundbite politics depressing. I have sat in at a meeting this week contucted almost entirely in cliche. Can someone explain what an "iterative" (?) process is? On second thoughts, please don't. Meanwhile, I received an e-mail from someone who said "I have got round the problem by frigging my sheet". Either that has homophonous/polysemic aspects of which I was previously unaware or it was random information that caused me to choke on the completely foul coffee.

I would admit to being part of the decline. I have been fascinated by language as long as I can remember. I have a couple of degrees in English and yet, I have wobbly spelling and a fairly hazy grasp of the finer points of punctuation. My writing style is generally stream of consciousness.

Even bearing this in mind, I am shocked by the level of literacy and knowledge displayed by many youngsters who are clearly intelligent (not the ones I meet on the downs) and occasionally by the inability of people earning about four times what I do to write a coherent letter.

Language is the thing that distinguishes us as a species. It is a powerful force for political control. Synchronic and diachronic linguistics mirror the history of the world.

I live in a society where, to speak english correctly opens you up to ridicule, where we are governed by a man who, despite a privileged education, cannot articulate the word "government", where the education system has been debased and tinkered with ..... Soon English will be preserved by highly literate foreigners while the natives regress to communicate in grunts.

Yet there are a few bright spots - maybe all is not lost when cockney slang can contrive "Listerine" mean anti-american. There are some glorious neologisms like "chuddies". Otherwise, I might join with my old lecturer's campaign to revive what he termed "perfectly good words that have fallen out of use". I am possibly a hopeless case, having had an upbringing in the " A lounge is something they have in hotels, darling" mould and consequently a rather miserable time at the rather rough comprehensive school I attended. I learnt too late the need to be bilingual in myown language....

Ah well..... what was the question...?

[Gothmog]

Speaking of language, I'd like to send the english-latin mumbojumbo I have to read every day to Mordor. Words like Oligodendrogliocyt, adrenocorticotropic hormone, schlerenchyma, morphogenesis or phytoremediation... Does that sound sane to you?

And to all of you english speaking persons sending grammar or spelling to this and that dark place, think of us non-native english speakers. We've got to learn at least two languages to manage in this world: our own and yours. Not that I try to imply that you have an easy time in school or that we are so much brighter than you (that's up to each and everybody to decide ). I guess I'm just looking for some sympathy . I don't want to send learning english to the Land of Shadows, but I agree in sending spelling, english or whatever language, and grammar to Mordor.

Not much of a consistent or coherent post this, is it? Halfway I started to wonder what it was I thought of in the beginning

[Eonwe]

well, i send irregular verbs in whatever language (if they're not there already) to mordor. what good is grammar (rules!) if you can disregard them sometimes!

[littlemanpoet]

Here's an alphabetical list of what was assigned to Mordor on the first 5 pages of this thread. Enjoy the review, or skip it if you prefer.

alarm clocks
algebra
American spelling
apostrophe mis-users
ATMs
authors of 'bad-ism' allegories
bad weather
'Big Brother' television
black licorice
boredom
British spelling
British television miniseries
British transportation system
Britney Spears
budget cuts
busy-work
CAPs lockers
'Caucasian' used to categorize or describe white people
celebrity magazines
cell phones
chapped lips
'chavs'
chewing gum spat out, covering pavement
cigarettes
cigarette smokers
cold viruses
comic sans font
computer viruses
conjunctivitis
corsets
country music
dangling prepositions
deadlines
diamonds
drivers who ignore pedestrians
empty tubes of chap stick
dentists
depression
dirty dishes
Disney
dog clothes
dogs that can't be housebroken
door to door sales people
double negatives
early classes
emergency rooms
English
fan fiction
final exams
fish
flash software
flat tires
food poisoning
frat parties
frog ring tones
fume and stench
furry animals
geometry
German
getting up early
government trying to improve people
ground spitters
guys who think pretty girls are always dumb
'have got'
heavy traffic
hot weather
i.b. exam (?)
ignorant fools
inability to turn down food dares
inconsiderate customers
incorrect written use of your and you're
incorrect written use of its and it's
intolerant people
Jamesian English speakers
know nothing nurses
lack of published Quenya
lawn mowing
lemmings
liability paranoids
library freeloaders
lima beans
long road trips
Mary Sues
math
men who proposition random girls
mice
mobile phones
'my bad'
'myself and ______'
nagging mothers
news report sound bites
nightmares
nonstandard word users
nuclear bombs
'nuculer'
'official Wendy's guy'
off-topic posts
overzealous political correctness
parents who name their kids badly
people always in a rush
people who are easily offended
people who are horrified by 'weird' food combinations
people who are overly worried about offending others
people who hate white chocolate
people who pay with change
people who say 'it's not rocket science'
people with gender double standards
perverts
political correctness
political correctness ignoramuses
politicians
Portuguese men of war
possums
pretentious pronunciations
pretentious silent letters
pretentious pronunciation of foreign words and phrases
PT Cruisers
purple ketchup
queue cutters
rabbit bites
raccoons
racism
rap music
reality television
red food coloring
religious fundamentalist terrorists
rising gas prices
road rage
SAT supporters
scary professors
shrieking early birds
slugs
snorers
snotty Sarumans
snotty upperclassmen
soap operas
soccer
spell checkers
spider bites
spyware
squirrels
standard English
stupid people
summer reading books
tax code writers
tax collectors
thongs
tomato hornworms
unfriendly computers
unpredictable kilns
vectors
vomit
war
watered down drinks
Wednesdays
white chocolate
Yankees announcers
year-long redundant teachers
Yoda


--------um, that tomato one is something I'll need to go back and figure out, because I couldn't read my own writing ..... unless one of you remembers and can tell me.

So just to keep this in the spirit of the thread, I assign to Mordor my own sloppy writing that I can't read later.

[radagastly]

I did a search. I think it was Tomato Hornworms posted by Oddwen. I'm not sure what tomato hornworms are, but they sound like they belong in Mordor.

[Oddwen]

They're big, waxy, green, horrid, fat, ugly caterpillars that can bite. Oh gross, I just found a recipe...bring the Mordor-bound truck around, there's another shipment ready...

[littlemanpoet]

Originally Posted by radagastly

I did a search. I think it was Tomato Hornworms posted by Oddwen. I'm not sure what tomato hornworms are, but they sound like they belong in Mordor.

Thanks for the assist, radagastly! (forgot to say that earlier, sorry)