If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would.... - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

TomBrady12 · 03-09-2005, 08:58 AM

Put on some ultra strong ear muffs and crank up the Dixie Chicks...gotta watch out for friendly fire though

TB12

Formendacil · 03-09-2005, 09:59 AM

200,000 orks is a disaster waiting to happen. All that I need to effect it is a few costumes, a little bit of wit, and a nuclear bomb shelter.

To start off, when I find 200,000 orks on my doorstep, my first move is to don my generic-ork costume, slap on a silvery S-rune, and go visit the Isengarders. There, I spread the rumour that the Moria-orks prefere the command of the Mordor-orks to the Isengarders.

Before things get too hot there, I switch emblems, and go visit the orks of Lugburz, and discreetly whisper that the Isengarders plan to let the Mordor-orks lead the charge, and get slaughtered, so that they can feast on Mordor-ork-flesh.

Then I scrap all emblems, and dash over to the Misty Mountain goblin camp, and inform them that the Mordor orks have killed Blub, the illegitimate son of Bolg and the Great Goblin. Without stopping to see their reactions, I run over to my bomb shelter, and await the explosion.

Three hours, twenty-six minutes later, I emerge, having shaved, washed, and put on perfume and Elf-clothes. I brandish my bow and sword and do my best Elf-warrior impersonation. If the two-and-a-half remaining orks don't flee in terror, they'll probably die of laughter.

Annalaliath · 03-09-2005, 03:31 PM

weild my wooden sword in one hand and my sabor bayonett in the other, when my wooden on breaks grab the cast Iron frying pan, and throw my Tree Beird action figure at them... when all this fails just run away...

mark12_30 · 03-09-2005, 03:37 PM

Look up to see if Frodo had destroyed the Ring yet.

the guy who be short · 03-09-2005, 03:53 PM

Bar the gates!

Then take my trusty bow (made of a few small pieces of wood) and irritate them with my seven ro so arrows. Then barricade myself and presume that I have more supplies for one person in my house than the orcs have supplies outside.

Sett · 03-09-2005, 04:15 PM

If i found 200,000 orcs outside my front door i would.

1. Get the hose and spray down those smelly things
2. Get them to buy aprons from the local store
3. Give them gardening tools and say the weeds stole there land.
4. and finally i would get them to pose as gnomes so i dont get damned Jehovas Witnessess coming to the door

Lady_Galadriel · 05-26-2005, 09:41 AM

If i found 200,000 orcs outside my front door i would.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sett

1. Get the hose and spray down those smelly things

.. hey you took my idea!!! first i would hose down the nasty orcs and when they were nice and wet they would go mentally insane becasue they dont know how to deal with being sparkly clean!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sett

4. and finally i would get them to pose as gnomes so i dont get damned Jehovas Witnessess coming to the door

oh i labsolutley love that idea!! orkish lawn gnomes!!! yay!!!!!!

03-09-2005, 09:59 AM	#2
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,328	200,000 orks, eh? 200,000 orks is a disaster waiting to happen. All that I need to effect it is a few costumes, a little bit of wit, and a nuclear bomb shelter. To start off, when I find 200,000 orks on my doorstep, my first move is to don my generic-ork costume, slap on a silvery S-rune, and go visit the Isengarders. There, I spread the rumour that the Moria-orks prefere the command of the Mordor-orks to the Isengarders. Before things get too hot there, I switch emblems, and go visit the orks of Lugburz, and discreetly whisper that the Isengarders plan to let the Mordor-orks lead the charge, and get slaughtered, so that they can feast on Mordor-ork-flesh. Then I scrap all emblems, and dash over to the Misty Mountain goblin camp, and inform them that the Mordor orks have killed Blub, the illegitimate son of Bolg and the Great Goblin. Without stopping to see their reactions, I run over to my bomb shelter, and await the explosion. Three hours, twenty-six minutes later, I emerge, having shaved, washed, and put on perfume and Elf-clothes. I brandish my bow and sword and do my best Elf-warrior impersonation. If the two-and-a-half remaining orks don't flee in terror, they'll probably die of laughter. __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

03-09-2005, 03:31 PM	#3
Annalaliath Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Albuquerque Posts: 380	weild my wooden sword in one hand and my sabor bayonett in the other, when my wooden on breaks grab the cast Iron frying pan, and throw my Tree Beird action figure at them... when all this fails just run away... __________________ Bloody Stumps!!!

03-09-2005, 03:37 PM	#4
mark12_30 Stormdancer of Doom Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars Posts: 4,349	Look up to see if Frodo had destroyed the Ring yet. __________________ ...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve.

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03-09-2005, 08:58 AM	#1
TomBrady12 Haunting Spirit Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Red Sox Nation Posts: 69	Put on some ultra strong ear muffs and crank up the Dixie Chicks...gotta watch out for friendly fire though TB12

03-09-2005, 03:53 PM	#5
the guy who be short Shadowed Prince Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Thulcandra Posts: 2,343	Bar the gates! Then take my trusty bow (made of a few small pieces of wood) and irritate them with my seven ro so arrows. Then barricade myself and presume that I have more supplies for one person in my house than the orcs have supplies outside.

03-09-2005, 04:15 PM	#6
Sett Pile O'Bones Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: The Baths of Hell Posts: 24	If i found 200,000 orcs outside my front door i would. 1. Get the hose and spray down those smelly things 2. Get them to buy aprons from the local store 3. Give them gardening tools and say the weeds stole there land. 4. and finally i would get them to pose as gnomes so i dont get damned Jehovas Witnessess coming to the door