A Downer Dinner Party

[Encaitare]

Ah, Boromir, I must remember to come back and rep that post as soon as I can... *wipes eyes*

If I was really seated next to Gothmog... I think I'd prod his arm-tumor-growth thing with a fork. A lot.

[THE Ka]

6. Next, THE Ka. And she's not just any Ka, mind you. We'd discuss mystical things and compare star charts.

Ah! Lovely! Thank you! I wouldn't mind holding the stars at gunpoint for you ...Er, I mean... They never do stay in one position for any reasonable time, that First House is a fast one!

Thank you,

~ Astro Ka~

[elronds_daughter]

Well, this seems like much fun! I must get in on this....


As for invitees ('Downers in bold):

1) The Barrow-Wight, because he is all-powerful. To not invite him would be a dire sin, and invoke his wrath.

2) Eowyn, because she is my hero. Need I say any more?

3) Sapphy, for what party is complete without her?

4) Merry, so he and Eowyn could collaborate on showing me their famous Nazgul-slaying technique.

5) Boromirr88, to collaborate with Sapphy on livening up the party.

6) Aragorn, because, after all, why not?

7) Faramir, because, after all, why not?

8) Feanor of the Peredhil, because she's just cool.

9) the phantom, because where Fea goes, he will follow, so why not just invite him?

10) And last, of course, myself.

<Sorry, Fordim, I got a bit out of proportion!>



As for menu, I'd just have Bilbo cater it, since he cooks better than he cooks, if you know what I mean.

[Boromir88]

Thank yee Elrond, I love parties!

You know, my first party seemed more enjoyable, had some comedy, had some dancing, a lot of friendly conversations. I think my 2nd party I'm going to liven it up a bit, get the invitees paired up with a certain person to really add a bit of spice .

(The order will go from right to left, as before, notice who I have my guests sitting next to.) :devil smiley:

1) Me- again.

2) Eowyn, since she's pretty. Note: I invited Faramir too but for some reason Eowyn didn't let him come (for the reason you'll have to see the following guests).

3) Aragorn

4) Arwen- Oh man, this should get good. Aragorn will have his hands full tonight.

5) Lalwende- You know, I decided to invite her back because she's not in her true, full personality without the guest she is sitting next too. P.S. Lal, bring the spiders.

6) Davem- Davem, bring your reputation jewels, we're settling it tonight.

7) Elrond- just sits and mutters how stupid and weak everyone is.

8) SpM- (reason below)

9) Turin- Think I don't see these two arguing a lot. Instead of the classic battle of good vs. evil, its Moviest vs. purist.

Note: I'm not paired up with anyone since I happen to like everyone. :angel smiley:

Edit: Special guests for the evening will be Mith, SpM, and Fordhim to endlessly debate...the many debatable topics (as well as the controversial Aragorn). I can see this one getting violent.

I know you will all be pleased to hear, the dinner is staying the same as the first party, only thing, one addition:

Mirkwood Salad- Some nice wilted lettuce topped with this dark black dressing. You might find the occasional spider leg in there too, try to pick em out they tend to get stuck in your teeth.

[Bêthberry]

Oh, you, Fordim Hedgethistle! Just when I am most confusticated and bebothered with real life dinner parties you suggest one here! However, as I am want to celebrate all the twelve days of Christmas, up to and including the Orthodox calendar celebration, I think I am but merely fashionably late. (Oh, do I use that line too often?) So, for this time, I shall not call fie and indigestion upon our gracious host, Fordim. Or is he more like an Innkeeper here, overseeing many various guests and parties?

Well I recall this particular parlour game, although I tended a bit mischievously to mix the likes of Laurence Sterne and Henry Fielding with, say, Ann Radcliffe and Jane Austen, or Mary Wollstonecraft and Elizabeth Browning. I thank you for your gracious invitation to myself, Fordim, and promise in a later party to include you in a manner more fitting for your interests. For now, here is my first party:

A dark and dingy cellar deep in the back streets of Dale, long before the Desolation of Smaug. Conspirators meet, perhaps with an aim of mounting eventually an expedition to The Shire in hopes of purloining needed aid against the Were-Worm. Oil lanterns light the scene half-heartedly and a small stone fireplace casts some heat. Walls are black with soot and smoke lingers in the air. This will likely prove an uproarious repast and so don?t expect impeccable manners, for hysterical furore oft generates energetic rumpus. It?s that kind of party for that kind of age. Needless to say, no elves.

The daughter of Tom and Goldberry sits quietly opposite Squatter of Amon Rùdh, who generously gesticulates his many points, especially when they are contested by Kuruharan, who sits to Bethberry's right and equally pontificates his own queries and questions. Both of these Downer dwarves, however, are often silenced by the argumentative scrappings of those paragons of domestic bliss, Aulë and Yavanna, who sit across from each other, one to Bethberry's left and the other to Squatter's right. A smug look of satisfaction can be seen to cross his face whenever the couple become particularly cantankerous. Who's afraid of the Valar wolves?

Beside Aulë sits Dis, that most mysterious of dwarven kind, whose reaction to the rough and tumble of the discourse could well cement the future fate of females of her kind. Beside Yavanna sits Bullroarer Baggins, a mighty giant of his kind and well able to hold his own against this fractious fellowship.

We are lucky to have with us more peacemakers than just the Bombadil daughter. Estelyn sits at the left of Squatter, knowing him perhaps the best of all the present company and able to punctuate his wit with cryptic observations of her own. It is from this meal and this cabal that she learns so ably how to egg both Squatter and Kuruharan on in the REB stakes.

Beorn sits opposite Bullroarer while the legendary burrahobbit rounds out the table with the requisite corrections of all errors in thought and legendarium which might proceed from the clash of opinion. Sometimes, just sometimes now mind you, he wishes Obloquy were present.

And of what shall the conspirators partake? Well, a secret meeting cannot be picky about its victuals or potables. Plain faire it shall be. Fowl pie of some sort and blood sausage. Fish chowder. Neeps and greens and carrots. Heavy, dark rye bread or eight grain, served with butter and gooseberry jam. Poached eggs on beds of spinach and mushrooms. Steamed puddings and raspberry tarts. There shall be porter and dark ale to drink, mead and cider for those wishing something sweeter. And some time towards the end of the affair, coffee, if they are not interrupted and forced to see their plans come together as they fight off yet another incursion of Smaug. You might say they are my ?A dinner team.?

[Lalwendë]

I don't 'do' parties, because firstly, my house is far too crowded with books and mathoms and creatures that allowing more than two humans within is a recipe for disaster, and secondly, I am always so aftraid of offending anyone that I would have to invite everyone I knew, so the recipe for disaster would end up being served as a steaming dish. But anyway, 'tis a bit of fun, so here goes:

Lalwende's Breaking the Light Supper Thing

Now I'm not altogether fond of dinner parties, being quite self conscious when eating as I tend to spill food all over the place (and a bag of chips on a wall is much more my 'thing'), but I might hold a special one with the above theme. It would centre around discussion of theories of Light in Arda, and conversation would become very spacey and deep. To that end, I have had to invite those who seem to have an understanding of cosmological concepts and a willingness to risk madness in pursuit of that understanding.

The table will be round, as like King Arthur, I wish all to be considered as equals. And this dinner party will be held in a big old tent thingy (what other people with more posh circles of acquaintance may know as a Marquee) with a hole in the ceiling to let all the smoke out, and allow the night air in to soothe troubled brows.

Saruman - not popular at Downer dinner parties, I should have to hope he could regain his physical form and attend (though if he came in spirit form at least it would leave more food and drink for everyone else), as I am quite desperate to know if he was performing acts of evil, thought he was being a scientist or was some kind of heretic. He can explain that staff and what he was doing with the Palantir too.
Gandalf - as a foil to Saruman, I would want him there to calm the effects of his former leader's voice. But also to give his perspective on what exactly Saruman was doing wrong. I'd hope he'd explain something of the Secret Fire too.
Boromir88 - because he is willing to jump in and tackle the thorny issue of Light, science and cosmology and not afraid to speculate.
davem - because he too is willing to discuss this and he knows all about Fleiger and is very clever, and that last thing will quite go to his head.
Child - she knows about Light, too, and Fleiger. And she also has a calming influence which will stop any potential cross-table bun-throwing.
Galadriel - already very popular at Downer dinner parties I suppose I should have to book her months in advance. But her presence is required as she understands the divinity of Light.
Mark 12_30 - with her different perspective on the matter of Light and Divinity, she will enliven the table by posing questions that the rest of us might not have thought about.
Me - I'm not spending all night in the kitchen though.

Food and drink - the food will be provided by Rick Stein because as we all know, fish is good for the brains and they will be needed. And the grub in his restaurant is splendid. The drinks will consist of strange brews to stimulate the mind almost to the point of madness, and good pure Yorkshire water - my tipple of choice. Large bowls of tobacco will be placed on one of those lazy susan thingys in the middle of the table, and hopefully nobody will grumble about the smoke. I might consider serving a large vat of custard as Boromir88 may show willing to try out the theory that you can walk on it, which will suit the scientific theme of the evening - though he must not stand still as then the custard will act as quicksand and he will be trapped in it forever.

This dinner party will be such an outrageous success that it will be followed on the next day by:

Lalwende's Bun Feight

The table again will be round, as the theme of this dinner party will simply be 'laugh until your sides split', and a round table will facilitate better banter. I think I may again decide to hold it in the tent thingy, as I don't want my house ruined by any chucked food. And of course, I will be keen to get an extra night's usage out of aforementioned marquee, and it would be amusing to have it sent back slightly soiled. Anyone who even attempts to be serious shall be immediately forced to go into the kitchen and wash up. Alas, there is a slight gender imbalance here, as despite having so many marvellously funny ladies on the Downs, they are not quite so common seemingly within Middle Earth.

Mithalwen - because she does not fail to make me laugh and I want to see if she shouts when she's drunk.
Eomer of the Rohirrim - for his witty one-liners, and to keep Mithalwen quiet too.
Bilbo Baggins - because he's Bilbo, and my very favourite Hobbit, and of course he must come because of his way with words, upsetting people with his peculiar sense of humour and all that!
Tom Bombadil - to entertain us with some silly songs, some tall tales and his stomping about.
Davem - he gets another invite, because once he starts laughing, he doesn't stop for hours.
Bethberry - as she is not only frightfully smart, but very witty with it.
Estelyn - for her wonderful gentle humour, and her way with trouble makers; I have no doubt she will prevent any excessive chucking of food.
Heren-Istarion - he has such a strange sense of humour, slightly sarcastic, very clever, but never unpleasant!

Food and drink - now, I think the food should be mainly centred around things like cake - also known as 'buns' in these here parts, hence the 'feight', which suggests a 'fight' but in reality just means a party. Though I might also serve up fish and chips and mushy peas, in newspaper. The drinks served will be ales and lashings of ginger beer. The police will be called at 1am due to all the laughing echoing around the neighbourhood.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Being the glutton that I am for breeding malcontent, I have decided to go out and earn my punishments. My latest dinner gathering will be... eventful.

Guest number one: Durin's Bane. During dinner, we could permanently solve the wing question. I must be certain not to order chicken wings, as I hear that balrogs taste like them (ie: hot and like chicken), and the wing aspect of the appetizer may unshadow his fiery temper. Dessert shall be roasted marshmallows.

Roggie's dinner partner will be Meela. I rather think that she would appreciate his occasional party tricks of spouting flames. Also, her sense of humor might serve to keep my next two guests from annoying each other too much.

On my other side sit Nienna and Tom Bombadil. Her being in a state of constant sorrow and him not particularly understanding what that is should balance out quite nicely. He can cheer her up and she can, perhaps, get him to stop singing.

Further along the table sits Nilpaurion Felagund, arguing merrily with Adam.

Sitting at the far end of my table is Ungoliant, consuming rather more than her own fair share of the meal. Occasionally Roggie ups and flies to her end of the table in order to keep her in line, but when things get out of hand, I have a bucket of water handy to gooify him.

As I said, the meal with include no chicken wings, but perhaps I could serve lembas and such nice things for my "good" guests, and essence of all that is good to those not-so-nice personages.

Fea

[Mithalwen]

Originally Posted by Lalwendë

I

Mithalwen - because she does not fail to make me laugh and I want to see if she shouts when she's drunk.

Hmm, I haven't been drunk for a long time and when I was I was more of a maudlin drunk - but a glass or three does tend to loosen the tongue - if I get going on something I care about, alcohol is irrelevant. I do try not to shout because it is not a substitute for backing up the argument - ... but since I am not so good at thinking on the hoof, if I get angry I tend to go very quiet, and the tic starts up....

However, assuming Iwasn't driving there would be a chance that I might tell Bombadil just how annoying he was...