ME jokes and funny stories

[HerenIstarion]

Some centuries after the fall of Sauron. In Valinor, Celembrimbor (C) and Galadriel (G) converse:

C: Honey, you know, I've been reading one of those modern novels humans write in Hither Lands and we occassionaly get by Palantir transmissions...
G: So, dear, what bothers you?
C: There is a term applied to one of the heroes, I can't get what it may stand for. He acts strangely too... you know, visiting ladies by night, with a ladder! Funny, that. I looked it up in "Laws and Customs Among the Eldar", but could not find anything to match, you know...
G: Yes, dear, I'm listening?
C: And you are so wise, maybe you can explain things to me?
G: Of course, dear, don't be afraid to tell me, what troubles you?
C: Um, what is a 'lover'?
G: A 'lover'? Let me see, I seem to remember something... lover, lover, hm-mm... Ah, yes, I remember!

Galadriel runs swiftly to the wardrobe and jerks the door open.

G: Here, dear, this is the lover!

Indicating the small bearded skeleton crouched in the far corner of it...

***

Going back to the initial post, on page one:

Evening in Rivendell. Same company - Elrond, his council and Gandalf, some dozen people overall, by the hearth. Again, some coughs, muttering, swearing from the roof, some scrabbing in the chimney followed by some dozen of bright golden rings falling out.

Elrond: Surely, it's Frodo having his excercise again? Is it not a bit late? They set out tomorrow!
Gandalf: No, you forget it's Christmas. It's Santa Claus, he brought us presents according to our ultimate desire...