When You Are Oppressed, Or Ten Weighty Reasons for Teenagers and Their Parents

[Encaitare]

Try being born at 4:20 PM. I NEVER should have let that one slip.

Oh, Fea, I can only imagine.

Funnily enough most people who go into teaching do so with good intentions... not because they hate adolescents ...that is a consequence of teaching not a cause....

Actually, Mith, I want to be a teacher! Music education all the way. And don't mistake me; some of my teachers are the coolest, nicest, and funniest people I know. I do see your point, though.

[The Saucepan Man]

Interesting thread, this.

I sometimes wonder how my parents would have felt about me being on the internet, had it been around when I was a kid. I suspect that my mother would have been extremely suspicious of it, given that she was a confirmed technophobe (she never even got the hang of programming the video recorder). In contrast, many parents these days, and certainly in the not too distant future, will have used the internet frequently themselves and therefore be able to take a sensible approach towards their children's use of it. As others have said, it is little different from real life - one simply needs to exercise a little common sense regarding the disclosure of personal details etc and it's totally safe. Indeed, it's clearly a lot safer way of meeting total strangers than in real life, given that those that you are speaking to are not physically present.

My own children are still too young to start surfing the web or joining forums. When they are a little older, though, I would personally have no reservations about them frequenting sites such as this. In fact, I hope that I will be able to trust them to use the internet with limited (parental) restrictions, although that will depend on me being able to trust them to use it safely and sensibly. Which in turn depends upon my wife and I properly educating them in this regard, plus their own inclination to behave responsibily. Well, we shall see ...

I agree with those who have pointed out that one should make sure of discharging real life obligations (homework, work, chores etc) before rewarding oneself with a Downs session. Although I will have to clean up my own act before preaching to my children on this, since there are times when I have spent far too much time here. Having said that, the demands of family, work etc clearly always come first for me (as my absence for most of the previous month testifies).

As for the comments made concerning parties, alcohol etc, I do feel some slight alarm at some of the more extreme positions that have been taken here. However enjoyable (and, in some respects, educational) the Downs might be, it can, to my mind, never match up to real life interaction. I hope that people aren't letting the extreme behaviour of those they see indulging in wild parties, drugs etc letting themselves be put off enjoying a healthy social life. You really don't have to go wild to have a good time, you know. As HerenIstarion says, most things are good in moderation (there goes Saucepan not practicing what he preaches again, as he works his way through a fine bottle of wine ).

One final (off-topic) thought. I find it amazing how much us Downers seem to share interests in common (in addition to Tolkien of course). Like Enca and Feanor, I was a complete dinosaur nerd in my younger years. By the age of 8, I had made up my mind to be a Paeleontologist, which was a never-ending source of confusion for those who asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. (Alas that I did not follow my childhood inclination.) And it's not just dinosaurs either. The Beatles' music and Monty Python both seem to present a common a link between many Downers too. Perhaps there is some explanation for a link between these things and Tolkien's works ...

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

I hope that people aren't letting the extreme behaviour of those they see indulging in wild parties, drugs etc letting themselves be put off enjoying a healthy social life.

No way! I wouldn't let those people affect what I want to do. I go out with friends, I spend time with family, I have a great job and help teach at school (ie: one on one work with students and whatnot). I even do a little extreme behavior of my own... but nothing that's going to hurt anyone, unless of course my grandmother has a coronary when she sees my hair tomorrow... (I put orange streaks in last night, and they AREN'T temporary). I hope she doesn't, of course... not too likely.

Like Enca and Feanor, I was a complete dinosaur nerd in my younger years. By the age of 8, I had made up my mind to be a Paeleontologist, which was a never-ending source of confusion for those who asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Doesn't this sound familiar.... you see, it was mostly my brothers and Jurassic Park that got me into dinosaurs. It trailed off for a few years, but when I got into Geology and read a book on rocks front to back and discovered that the Spinosaurus egypticus was discovered by an amateur... let's just say that my dino-interest got renewed.

And it's not just dinosaurs either. The Beatles' music and Monty Python both seem to present a common a link between many Downers too. Perhaps there is some explanation for a link between these things and Tolkien's works ...

Why not start a thread on it, Saucie? You've listed Beatles' music (not my taste, for the most part, but still good), Monty Python (much to my taste), dinosaurs... what about shared activities, like Eomer-of-the-Rohirrim-stalking (his ego is fun to cuddle )? It seems like we share not only interests, but ways of persuing them. I'd be interested to see what other connexions we've all got.

Fea

[Encaitare]

I hope that people aren't letting the extreme behaviour of those they see indulging in wild parties, drugs etc letting themselves be put off enjoying a healthy social life.

Nah, I have a healthy social life. Most of my friends are complete dorks like me, so we're all dorky together. I just don't mind spending a lot of my time alone; I'm absolutely insane when I'm with my friends but I can't really open up around those I don't know too well. And as Fea said, I am not unknown to do crazy things.

By the age of 8, I had made up my mind to be a Paeleontologist

As did I! Other notions I had was that I was going to be a writer, an artist, and a "world explorer" like they used to do back when there was a "New World" to be found. I was not quite aware when I was 6 or so that just about everywhere had been discovered already.

Monty Python is truly a wonderful thing. And as for the Beatles... well, they did want to do a LotR movie, right? I must say I'm glad they didn't..

[HerenIstarion]

er, my excuses, any buddy wanted to be a truck driver or sailor? Just would be nice ter know, yer honours, would be. Just I really wanted to be one or either, or both together...

Let us leave trucks and go back to the track, though. Just watched some movie starring Keanu Reaves - Johny Mnemonic was the name, I believe

What the point of this post is, or would have been if I haven't had so much work on my hands right now to make it more like a post than short remark - the places like this (i.e. BD) will help us avoid turning human society into internet horror they've pictured in the movie.

PS. Mithalwen, I know what you talk about, . My experience may have been even worse, as I was only slightly older than my students for one, and, worst of all, we all lived in the same neighbourhood, which in Georgia is like what you get in the South of Italy or on Sicily - everybody knows everybody and is 'in league' against any kind of authority. Hence, my authority as a teacher equalled zero, though I have had some influence as a pal. But for my spectacles, I may have had more success, but stern behavioral pattern is not applicable when carried out by bespectacled youngster who dislikes shouting and have been seen about carrying a violin!. Horror, horror, playing violon is not a thing we real men do! Alas for my pedagogical career.

cheers

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

any buddy wanted to be a truck driver or sailor?

Guilty. Sailor indeed... I read the Dragonsong trilogy when it first came out and *poof!* wanted to live in a giant cave village full of fishermen, impressionable youth that I am. Mind you, those books also made me want to Impress a Dragon...

Hence, my authority as a teacher equalled zero, though I have had some influence as a pal.

I was supposed to go job shadowing for a class in school this year. I chose to shadow an art teacher (as that IS what I'd like to be), but when my teacher started arranging stuff... let's just say I wasn't particularly comfortable with some of the possibilities. One: a local highschool where over half of my extended family attends. Also attending that particular school are some kids that I just DO. NOT. LIKE. They are arrogant little.... Fea trails off into unintelligible muttering about kids who are a gang in everything but the name and can't even FIGHT fairly. Two: a local college (!) that not only does my eldest brother attend, but I know almost all of his friends there, and would be certain to have at least one of them in any classes I was in. It is my experience that kids do NOT like authority figures that are the same age, or god forbid, younger, than them. So Heren, you had kids you know that were younger than you... I would have had kids I know that were older than me, and/or related to me and/or don't much like me and would be willing to reek all sorts of havoc anywhere that I was supposed to being showing my responisible, professional self. I got my teacher to let me go to a middle school where I didn't know anyone but a cop.

My this thread has gotten off topic... unless we can convince parents to let us stay on The 'Downs soley because of educational/career discussions...

Fea

[the phantom]

My experience may have been even worse, as I was only slightly older than my students

It is my experience that kids do NOT like authority figures that are the same age, or god forbid, younger, than them

I've been doing tutoring as a job or as volunteer work for six years now and I have discovered that (around these parts anyway) the age of the kid matters more than my age.

For these past six years it's been the same- kids 7 and under do what I tell them, kids 8-10 need to be told more than once, kids 11-13 are nearly impossible to deal with, kids 14-15 are similar to 8-10 years olds, and kids 16 and older do what I tell them (just like kids 7 and under).

I know it seems weird but that's how it has always been for me. 11-13 year olds are always the worst but once they get old enough they don't mind if you're close to their age as long as you aren't a jerk or something. My friends that are around my age do what I tell them much quicker than the junior high students I tutor.