When You Are Oppressed, Or Ten Weighty Reasons for Teenagers and Their Parents

[Orominuialwen]

I am very fortunate in that my parents (especially my mother) approve of the Barrow-Downs. They realize that I'm not going to do anything stupid like give out my real name, my age, my phone number, or any location more specific than the city and state I live in (there are over 200,000 people in it, so it's not like I'd be easy to track down just going on that.) Due to my time here I've become a much better typist (I've gone from being absolutely terrible to only moderately bad ) and a better writer (I now cringe to see some of my early posts). I've really become more outgoing from my time here, too. Normally I am very shy and hardly talk around people I don't know well, but not so here. I've also learned tons about different parts of the world and other cultures due to the fact that the BDer's come from all different places. The 'Downs is an education in itself!

[HerenIstarion]

Long live akhtene! Praise her with great praise!
Cuio i akhtene anann! Aglar’ni akhteniannath
Praise her with great praise, akhtene of the great mind!
Daur a Berhael, Conin en Annűn! Eglerio!
Praise her!
Eglerio!
A laita te, laita te! Andave laituvalmet!
Praise her!
Cormacolindor, a laita tárienna!
Praise her! The thoughtful heart, praise her with great praise!’

*Anyone versed in elvish is welcome to correct all of those 'eglerio'-s (which I have a feeling do not apply to singular and feminine at all) and other similar stuff and things...

And, of course, nice to see akhtene back

Partying re: nothing bad in having little fun, as long as one has fun. And truly, 'my fun is different from yours' Men may long remember your words, Ioreth (um, sorry, I mean, Fea)! For there is hope in them

And yet, and yet we down here, (yours truly at least) are for a good middle line, or, wossname, golden mean, divine proportion and all of them strange things wise [wo]men do. Or:

All of the parties involved should compromise, as far as I see things, but sometimes there is a need for a little push and shove. Democracy we live in, and all are equals, but, recalling particular farm of fame, some of us are more equal than others, and in the parent-child dichotomy parent is exclusevely more equal (by far, by very very far). Hence the need of the push mentioned, and what is a better push than simple letting the opposite side in? Conqeurors came and went, but Ankh-Morpork stood where it stands...

So, do not merely complain, be more constructive! What was that c[h]at thing about, eh? Yours truly enjoys his beer and a little wine sometimes, so hush about digestive systems and panleukopenia of feline family members, pray

Besides, wine drinking has a lot of tradition behind it. Letting alone quite obvious Christian connections, almost all of the pre-Cristian religions considered wine as sacred (Sun worship, usually). Not to forget Thranduil's good elves and especially the butler, Galion, who's preferences in the matter allowed Bilbo to free dwarves (dear mods, I'm a sneak, I can keep any topic Tolkien related ).

Excessive application of anything is what's really harmful.

cheers

[mark12_30]

some of us are more equal than others, and in the parent-child dichotomy parent is exclusevely more equal

Hilarious. Bravo!

[Mithalwen]

Ah but they should be careful ... because there comes a time when they are aged and infirm and the roles are reversed

[Amanaduial the archer]

(- hey, mom (dad, uncle, yer honour, reverend Brown), I've found the candy which is tasty and wholesome!
- Can't be, there is no wholesome candies!
- But look, here, look at the list of its properties which are good for you
- What list? Lemme see, um, er, yes, but is it, really?
- And the list is approved of by Co7A, who is parent and teacher herself, and this H-I chap who made it is only 31.3% geek and works in a bank, and is a swimmer and has a Master's degree (I know I'm vain, but it for the sake of the Case ) And I've already done my homework, made 10 pull-ups on the bar out there and focused on Mr Grey's car, which is 200 yards away for the whole of ten minutes!
- Allright, since it is so wholesome, er, um, I suppose you may have it...)

Ah, but amusing though that arguement is, Heren, it actually doesn't strengthen the case for some parents. For example, about a year and a half ago, when I was in a particularly good mood at the Downs (just over a year and a half actually - January '03?), and so Mother went through the mandatory dangers-of-the-internet-there-are-all-sorts-of-people-out-there talk. I decided not to mention that yes, I know that, a helluva lot of them go to my school, and instead took the tack that those of them who I talk to in PM or email knew only what I disclosed, and that was very little; and that I knew bits and pieces about them. When The Suspicious Parent asked what sort of things, I then went on to say that most lived in America (true of the people I talked to at the time) and a few ages.

The Parent was shocked - I was talking to people 'somewhat older' than myself. She asked in horror how did I know they didn't fit into the category of dangers-of-the-internet-there-are-all-sorts-of-people-out-there, and in my defence I said no! I mean, for example, one of them is an international lawyer! (There, I just gave away the member's identity, didn't I? )

Oddly, I don't think this helped matters. You see, The Suspicious Parent is a strange species: disclose information meant to reassure her, and what she actually hears is that you have disclosed the same sort of information and more to All Sorts on the internet. Hrm. And this does make things rather difficult. What's more, I don't like my parents to come on the forum - not for any sort of reason against you, dear readers, simply because I don't like them reading my writing - I get seriously embarassed. This doesn't exactly look good to The Suspicious Parent, I suppose...

Still, as yet, I have only been banned once, and that was from the internet in general. It was just after my parents got the internet bill *winces* But they have no quarrel with an alleged Tolkien forum which I use primarily for writing: I have always liked creative writing, and I think the Downs may, yes, have helped. The fundamental issue is, and always will be, trust.

[Mithalwen]

A lot of it is to do with the fact that most people are unable to evaluate risk accurately. I mean there is a perception that the big wide world is an especially dangerous place for women and children to venture into alone but in fact, the majority children who are murdered or abused are victims of their own parents, women are usually the victim of their husbands/boyfriend. The people most likely to be murdered by strangers are young men.

And if parents think that the Downs is really a problem ..they really have a strange worldview... I mean ... my brain has been more stretched here that it has anywhere since leaving uni...and perhaps in some respects more than at uni!. And to be exposed to what can be post-grad level discussion at schoolage ...surely can only be positive.... or maybe parents get suspicious because it seems impossible that teenagers could ENJOY learning....

That said..there are some very odd people out there .... on a rare visit to an (innocuous) chat room it took all of 3 seconds to encounter a sleazoid creep...

But, I sometimes get the feeling that there is a disproportionate fear because it was the internet - A couple of years ago, I was lucky enough to travel to Australia and NZ. Now, I had been talking to someone on a tennis site for 3 years and she lived near my family in Melbourne so we arranged to meet (in a bar, in the afternoon)..... and even though I am big enough, old enough and ugly enough to take care of my self - my Aussie family were completely paranoid ......"You mean you don't know her surname, or address.....blah blah blah".( Iand that was just meeting another girl of the same age).. but when I was solo travelling in NZ I would go for meals with other lone travellers who just happened to be travelling on the same bus / staying at the same hostel judging merely on appearance....
This didn't give the Aussie rellies the vapours at all......

Actually the priniciples for lone travelling (which was what I did to worry my parents before the internet was widespread lol ) could be apply just as well to the net ..... Be prepared, aware of the potential dangers, don't stray in to areas you know to be dangerous and prepare strategies to get out of dangerous situations you may fall into by chance. And then having minimised the risks enjoy the journey!!

[HerenIstarion]

Be prepared, aware of the potential dangers, don't stray in to areas you know to be dangerous and prepare strategies to get out of dangerous situations you may fall into by chance. And then having minimised the risks enjoy the journey!!

I have a feeling that applies to life in general, not Internet or journeying only . Good piece of advice, it is, sounds almost Jerome K. Jerome rendered into plain speech, without allegory of boats and rivers, kudos!

The Suspicious Parent is a strange species

Our parleys are with that kind of species, for the most part, I believe, as Unsuspicious Parent does not ban child's activities. As before, my advise would be - let them read printable version of current thread. There is almost no issue wich can not be resolved with a good ole' discussion of it [*Unless the issue in question is the conversation of two males along the lines of - 'I'm strong enough to beat the s**t out of you' - that kind of debate is founded on northern tradition of heroic boasting and can not be resolved with the means of greek philosophy and debate] You can cut out your own post, as SP may get hurt a bit at the title, I expect. Or maybe not, as SP may grow more aware of the situation, and reflect why such a 'titulage' may have been earned or unearned

But I would be glad if people like Child or mark or akhtene made more of appearance on this here thread, as, though I'm no longer a child, I'm not a parent either, so my position may be biased a bit. Let us hear more from the other side, eh?