THE LONELY STAR (Contd. from BD birthday party)

[Child of the 7th Age]

Nitir was awakened just after dawn. She could hear Lindo clambering about in the common room as he prepared to escape into the woods to tend his pony. Nitir laughed. Lindo did his errands so silently and secretly. Perhaps he thought she'd be angry at him for stealing away a bit of time from other duties. If so, nothing could be more wrong. In Nitir's mind, every moment the hobbits spent stroking ponies or eating fish stew or singing gay tunes was one more slap against Morgoth and his Orcs. They had no swords or axes to face evil as her friend Piosenniel had done. But they did have the daily routine of their lives, and if that was all they had at the moment, that was what they'd have to use to do their battles. She was quite certain that Orcs would never kiss a pony on the nose or compose tunes about great snowball fights. But, to Nitir, these were small and hard won victories.

Nitir went and poked the dying ashes of the fire as she watched them spring up to life again. Then she went over to the wall and, with trembling fingers, gently wiggled and twisted the old vellum this way and that until the ledger came loose once more. The title on the first page said, "Athrabeth Finrod ah Andreth" which in Adunaic meant "The Debate of Finrod and Andreth." She sat down at her table and began to read.

One hour later, Nitir still sat at the table, a look of disbelief and wonder on her face. In all her years of studying lore, she had never come across anything quite like this. She could not just sit here with the Athrabeth. She had to share it with Maura.

Nitir threw her cloak on and raced over to the enclosure where the hobbits kept the two scraggly goats they'd found. These two little animals provided what little milk they had for the children. Just as Lindo's early morning task was to tend the pony, it was Maura who generally fed the goats.

She flew up to him with the manuscript in her arms. "I must talk to you, Maura. It's important." It was still too cold to remain outside very long so they went back to his cramped and grey burrow. As often as possible, Zira came here to be with her husband Ban. Zira had spent last night in the burrow, and was now bustling about and hoisting the heavy kettles.

She and Maura sat on the ground as most of the small hobbit burrows did not have the luxury of tables or chairs. The cooking fire lay in the middle of the floor with a single vent out through the ceiling. The burrows themselves had few windows so things tended to be a bit gloomy and grey. Maura leaned forward towards the cooking fire to let the light from the flames illumine the pages.

When he finished reading, he gazed up at Maura, "This is absolutely wondrous," he whispered. Then Nitir explained to them how she had found the papers.

"What do you think of this? she asked him.

"I'm not certain, but my own grandfather knew Andreth well. They spent much time together in Ladros learning the lore from Finrod and other Elves. He heard once that there was great love between the wise woman and Aegnor. Aegnor was an Elf and Finrod's brother. But he was not certain if that was true, and he kept the matter to himself It was said that the joining of a mortal and immortal could only lead to sadness,and this should only happen if there was a great doom involved."

Nitir thought back on her own friend Piosennial, both the love of her parents and the sadness that love had brought. She wondered what great doom had lain upon their family to allow the marriage to take place, like that of Beren and Luthien. And she immediately saw in her mind an image of the Star with the banner of Earendil flying from the mast and Kali standing at the front of the ship. The meaning of this was so overwhelming that she pushed it gently from her mind, to be retrieved later and pondered on.

"And what of her feelings of sadness? Her anger at there being such a great gulf beween the immortal Elves and mortal Men? Her sadness that her own people should pass from Arda so soon and know nothing more of their fate?" Nitir lowered her voice and said. "When I spoke with Ancalimon the other night, my own words were not too different from these. But, after I had said them, I felt ashamed and yet part of me still felt that sadness and held those same questions. That was when Ancalimon laughed, and said, with my sharp tongue and good heart, I reminded him a bit of Andreth. Then I was in darkness, but now I understand what he meant."

"You are not the only one, Nitir, who asks such questions." And Maura sighed looking hard into the fire.

"Sometimes, I have even wondered if our people would not be better off if we
did not live so near to the Elves." he pondered. "All of hobbit lore and learning were first given to the Fallohides by the Elves, and then we passed them on to our Harfoot and Stoor kin. But it is not easy having the Elves so close to us. When a hobbit mother sees her child die from illness at birth and then looks over and sees the Elves who know no illness, it does not go easy for her."

Nitir looked down at the earth, her voice trembling, "What of the hobbit girl who sees her Elf friend die? For she rejoices that her friend will go to the Blessed Lands, and yet she doen't know where she herself will go, and can only feel sorrow because, even in death, she may never be with her friend again. This parting seems so harsh. And part of her is bitter that she cannot go to those same wondrous land."

"Yes, Nitir, I have felt this too. For, in Gondolin, we lived closely with the Elves and had many friends among them. Look at Lindo. He finally seems to have found his people again, but his early sorrow not only came from losing so many loved ones. He had chased after Elves for so many years and could even speak mind-to-mind as they do. When they were no longer close to him, he felt a great loss."

"Yet you do not speak mind-to-mind," Nitir whispered, "I have sometimes thought that you might have that gift."

"Perhaps, perhaps not. My grandfather could do such things but he felt that my life should be with my own people, and that this would only set me apart from them. For most hobbits do not desire or need such things."

Then they spoke a long time about the writings of Andreth, and there were many things written which they did not understand.

Then Maura continued, "But here is one thing I think is important. For, as to how the fea of an Elf and Man are different, do not forget that even Finrod says here that our own part as mortals may be greater than even that of the Elves. It seems to us that the Valar turn their faces away, but maybe they do not have power over us in the same way that they have over the Elven kin."

"Do you believe what is here in this paper? Nitir challenged. "Do you believe that our own doom lies in the hands of Eru?"

"Perhaps" Maura whispered. "And perhaps, as the Athrabeth says, Arda will not only have the marring undone at the end of time, but be made into a totally new thing. Perhaps, then, you can have your reunion with Piosenniel." And Maura reached over and kissed her on her curls.

"But this, Maura, this part," Nitir plunged on. "What do you think?" And Nitir pointed to a paper that had been added in at the very end. For this little piece talked of the hobbits as well as their close kin, the hobbrim, and how these peoples would have much to do in the battle against the Dark Ones. And it said that twice in the history of Arda, once in the Third Age and once at the end of all time, these peoples would have a great task and, without this task, there would be no healing of the earth.

Maura looked into the fire again. "I do not know about these wonders. But I do fear that Andreth has put something onto paper which should only have stayed in her heart. For, if Morgoth or his minions should see this thing, much evil could come to us, and perhaps even to all of Middle-earth."

"What should we do then?" Nitir asked.

"This ledger of the debate between Andreth and Finrod should be treasured by our people as a sign of friendship between hobbits and the house of Beor. But this paper?" And he held up the little piece that spoke of how the hobbits would fight against the Dark Lord. "I think that these words should go back to Ancalimon that he may do what is right. Perhaps he will keep the paper safe or even destroy it. For I do not have the wisdom to decide this thing."

Nitir nodded, "I fear you are right. There are many memories in my head which are gone, but I can recall that, in my own lands, there was some great thing which should have been destroyed, and was not. And that thing, whatever it was, caused untold grief to many people. I would not want that to happen again."

So Nitir gave the ledger and little paper back to Maura, and she went to her own work. But, all during the day, she kept thinking how much she liked being with Maura and how hard it would be to leave him.

[ August 16, 2002: Message edited by: Child of the 7th Age ]