101 Things LOTR Characters Would Never Say - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Aosama, the Wandering Star · 05-20-2002, 02:00 PM

Elrond sits down on his pouffy couch in Rivendell, glad to relax now that that pesky Fellowship is gone. I mean, really. Legolas trying all his hiar care products, and Boromir and Aragorn fighting over Arwen... it can really wear you out.
*turns on T.V.*
"Today, on Fashion Spy..."
Elrond: My favourite show!
"...you will be seeing the Fashion Greats, and the Fashion Mistakes."
*Elrond is aborbsed.*
"Here is today's Fashion Greats. We planted a secret camera at the Council of Elrond to get the footage you see here."
*Elrond sits straight up*
Elrond: That's my council! I'm on T.V.! They think I'm a fashion great!
"If you look to the corner, you'll see him. His blond hair is perfectly balanced by his silver robes..."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how great this guy is, Elrond acts very smug, convinced its him*
"And the name of our Fashion Great is..."
Elrond: Me! It's me! Elrond!
"...Legolas!"
*Elrond too shocked to do anything.Just sits there gaping.*
"Now, on his opposite is our fashion mistake. Those robes are totally second age, and I think I can still see battle smears from the Last Alliance!.."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how bad this guy is. then:*
"...and this poor unfortunate soul's name is... Elrond!"
*Elrond bursts into tears*
Elrond: Nooot faair! I'm w-w-way prettier than L-l-legolas! I'm gonna take a ba-a-ath!
*retreats sniffing to his bathroom, where we can soon hear him talking to his rubber ducky and singing.*
Elrond: ducky, everyone's so mean to me! *sniff*
Ducky: quack squeak.
Elrond: You really think so?
Ducky: squeak squeakity quack.
Elrond: Oh, me too! Let's elope! I'm so over Celebrian!
Ducky: Cluck squeak quackity.

"Next week on the Desperate and Deranged..."
p.s.: I do not in anyway mean offence to Elrond. Elrond is cool. This is stuff they'd NEVER say, remember?

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05-20-2002, 02:00 PM	#11
Aosama, the Wandering Star Wight Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Middle-Earth Posts: 210	Elrond sits down on his pouffy couch in Rivendell, glad to relax now that that pesky Fellowship is gone. I mean, really. Legolas trying all his hiar care products, and Boromir and Aragorn fighting over Arwen... it can really wear you out. turns on T.V. "Today, on Fashion Spy..." Elrond: My favourite show! "...you will be seeing the Fashion Greats, and the Fashion Mistakes." Elrond is aborbsed. "Here is today's Fashion Greats. We planted a secret camera at the Council of Elrond to get the footage you see here." Elrond sits straight up Elrond: That's my council! I'm on T.V.! They think I'm a fashion great! "If you look to the corner, you'll see him. His blond hair is perfectly balanced by his silver robes..." Announcer blahs on and on about how great this guy is, Elrond acts very smug, convinced its him "And the name of our Fashion Great is..." Elrond: Me! It's me! Elrond! "...Legolas!" Elrond too shocked to do anything.Just sits there gaping. "Now, on his opposite is our fashion mistake. Those robes are totally second age, and I think I can still see battle smears from the Last Alliance!.." Announcer blahs on and on about how bad this guy is. then: "...and this poor unfortunate soul's name is... Elrond!" Elrond bursts into tears Elrond: Nooot faair! I'm w-w-way prettier than L-l-legolas! I'm gonna take a ba-a-ath! retreats sniffing to his bathroom, where we can soon hear him talking to his rubber ducky and singing. Elrond: ducky, everyone's so mean to me! sniff Ducky: quack squeak. Elrond: You really think so? Ducky: squeak squeakity quack. Elrond: Oh, me too! Let's elope! I'm so over Celebrian! Ducky: Cluck squeak quackity. "Next week on the Desperate and Deranged..." p.s.: I do not in anyway mean offence to Elrond. Elrond is cool. This is stuff they'd NEVER say, remember?