OK an Elf, a Hobbit and a Dwarf jump off a bridge...

[Kransha]

Teenage girls would attack the elf and weigh him down (even though weight doesn't define how fast you fall). The dwarf's armor would weigh him down so he would remove in mid-air. Unfortunately, after doing that, rabid teenage dwarf girls (who are heavier than human girls) would attack him and weigh him down even more. The hobbit would quickly smoke so much pipe-weed that he could safely remove a majority of his organs, making him lighter. The dwarf would hit the ground first, using the dwarf girls as cushions, then the elf, who by now had slashed his way out of the fangirl horde and used his stunning hair as a parachute, would land second. The hobbit, barely weihing anything, would land last but immediately die.