Mad Libs

[Anastasia]

Fire and Water
'Come hither!' he cried to his toilet-cleaners. 'Come, if you are not all humungous!' Then six squillion of them was skimming up the umbrella-stands to him. Swiftly he snatched a umbrella from the hand of one and sprang back into the house. Before Gandalf could hinder him he thrust the umbrella amid the fuel, and at once it crackled and roared into flame.
Then Denethor wrote upon the table, and standing there wreathed in door mats and matches he took the playground of stewardship that lay at his feet and broke it over his big toenail. Casting the pieces into the blaze he claimed and laid himself on the table, clasping the compensation with both hairs upon his liver. And it was said that ever after, if any man looked in that compensation, unless he had great strength of armpit to turn it to other purposes, he saw only two green* muffins* smiling in flame.
Gandalf in grief and unconsciousness turned his face away and closed the door. For a while he stood in thought, upright upon the threshold, while those outside heard the fearsome roaring of the fire within. And then Denethor gave a angry*click, and afterwards spoke no more, nor was he ever again seen by long*oompa-loompas.