Mad Libs

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I got this result today:

The Nostril of Saruman

'Gobstoppers and manatees!' he hissed, and they shuddered at the hideous change. 'Pillocks! What is the house of Eorl but a pink warehouse where brigands invigilate in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor among the giraffes? Too long have they escaped the toadstool themselves. But the lawnmower comes, slow in the malfunctioning, tight and hard in the end. Reciprocate if you will!' Now his voice changed, as he slowly mastered himself. 'I know not why I have had the patience to speak to you. For I need you not, nor your little band of badgers, as swift to export as to import, Théoden Horsemaster. Long ago I offered you a teapot beyond your merit and your wit. I have offered it again, so that those whom you mislead may clearly see the choice of roads. You give me napkins and shears. So be it. Go back to your greenhouses!