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Hmmm...I suppose we could, in the interest of fair and unbiased parody, satirize all the candidates, whether Republican or Democrat, and match them with appropriate characters:
"Late is the hour in which this President chooses to appear. Obama, I name him. Ill news is an ill guest." - Ted Cruz
"And now at last it comes. You will give me the Presidency freely! In place of the Republicans you will set up a Queen. And I shall not be dark, but beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night! Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain! Dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning! Stronger than the foundations of the earth. All shall love me and despair!" - Hillary Clinton
"Why ever did I wake up!" he cried. "I was having such beautiful dreams. I dreamt I was walking in the White House..." - Chris Christie
"I don't hold with wearing ironmongery, whether it wears well or no." - Bernie Sanders
"You did not seriously think that an idiot senator could contend with the will of The Donald, there are none that can." - Donald Trump
"Never fitted me either. George W. was always the politician. They were so alike, he and my father. Proud... stubborn, even. But strong." - Jeb Bush
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And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision.
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