How do I best resist Morgoth?
By only attacking when you have a chance at winning. That means killings orcs that venture into your territory, outnumbering your enemy, and keeping an eye out for what Morgoth might do next. Don't recklessly charge Angband with your glittering hosts of elven warriors. Morgoth can just unleash his dragons, balrogs, etc. upon you and wreak havoc upon your army. Fight the small battles away from Angband, when you're on home turf. Try not to go on the offensive, it'll only put you on Morgoth's to-be-destroyed list.
Keep a good eye on the borders of your kingdom. Built watchtowers and outposts where necessary. Keep them stocked with gear and food for soldiers on the march.
How friendly should I be with Thingol?
Fairly friendly. You should send messengers to him bearing gifts and promising friendship. You, with combined armies, can be secure knowing that Morgoth will think twice about swooping down from the north to kill you. There's strength in numbers.
How far should I co-operate with my valiant, elficidal jewel-seeking relatives?
Try not to get involved with the whole oath/doom/kinslaying affair. It only brings trouble. Don’t make any solid alliances with any of them. In fact, the less you deal with them, the better. If you're unlucky enough to find a Silmaril in your hands, hand it over immediately. It's of little worth to yourself, and getting rid of it will deter the next kinslaying.
What sort of site would be good for my kingdom?
I would choose a site near the mountains, full of rocky, hilly terrain and thick forests. It'd be difficult for an army to maneuver in there. You should also preferably be near one or two major rivers, to act as easily defendable natural borders.
Do I go for:
A The cave network approach
A cave network is hidden underground, provides escape through numerous backdoors and secret passages, easily defended at a few major entrances, not obvious to find, and can still be a beautiful site for your throne. Plus, only you and your people know exactly the size of your caves. Morgoth would have a hard time pinpointing all the exits!
What do I do about Dwarves and Men?
Treat them with respect. If there are Dwarves in the nearby mountains, I'm sure they'll be glad to help you hew your caves out of the rock. Establishing trade with them is excellent, too. Just be careful about your alliances. An alliance with Thingol won't impress the dwarves in the long run, and vice versa.
As for Men, let them roam your kingdom; they're mostly harmless. Being friendly with them won’t hurt, and I'm sure they'd be glad to fight alongside you when orcs attack. Aside from that, you probably don't have much use for them.
But don't trust them too much. Let them settle at the kingdom's edges, but not within, lest they be captured by Morgoth and the secret locations of your outposts are given away.
What sort of culture am I ideally aiming for?
A secluded Elven stronghold, strongly defended and rarely venturing beyond its borders. You should be friendly towards all and fight only when attacked. Your strongest allies are the Sindar, and you are on friendly terms with Men and Dwarves. Your kingdom is rather estranged from the other Noldor, and you tend to stay out of their business.
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