I've not the time at the moment to give this question the thoughtful reply that it deserves; one point however:
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Originally Posted by Mithadan
I believe that every version of the Finduilas story emphasizes that Turin did not love her other than as a friend and did not have any desire to wed her.
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I'm not so sure. I don't have the books at hand at the moment, but my impression from the texts (and from the UT version in especial) is that Turin was chiefly reluctant to court Finduilas out of respect for, and a desire not to betray, Gwindor. Also, I recall that he was afraid he would bring his curse upon her. So I see Turin as attracted indeed to Finduilas, but holding himself back from wedding her for these (actually rather admirable) reasons.