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Old 09-14-2006, 06:12 PM   #184
Durelin
Estelo dagnir, Melo ring
 
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Join Date: Oct 2002
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Durelin is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Durelin is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Adnan

Adnan could not have been more shocked when Hadith actually asked him to stay. No one had voiced any desire for the fifteen-year-old’s company before, and he did not know quite how to react. His body worked in autopilot as he obeyed what was not even a command and sat back down. He had spent so long following orders… He was rather lost these days, now that he felt he actually was going somewhere. Hadith’s remarks that followed matched Adnan’s thoughts all too well, and sent a chill through his body, which forced him to shudder. He hoped the other young man hadn’t noticed. It seemed not, since the he was lost in his own thoughts.

The boy could not help but feel even more awkward now that Hadith was being so open with him, even though it made him feel warmer inside than he had felt in a long time, even though he felt honored. The slightly fairer skinned man would never know how much he was giving to Adnan just by telling him about his parents, those who cared for him, and how much it hurt that they were gone. The emotion – pain the sharpest – in his voice gave the younger man the deepest sense of what it meant to have someone love you, which was something Adnan had never been able to even begin to understand.

The awkwardness reached a new peak for the boy as Hadith burst into tears once again. Adnan felt some kind of pain close to his heart, but it did not pierce it: it was too strange to the boy, empathy, much less sympathy, was something he had learned to avoid. He was prepared to say something to break the silence and anguished sobs, but then Hadith broke out of his tears for a moment, though his voice shook violently.

“Do you have anyone?”

Adnan was caught with his mouth halfway open, and it remained that way, as he slowly and painfully realized that he did not know how to answer the question. He forced his mind to think. Did he have…“someone?” But what kind of someone? Someone like Hadith’s parents, like Khala and Cuáran? No one like them. He hadn’t really thought about what “having” someone was like. No one had ever been free enough for him to have…

“I guess not,” he said, more drearily than he really felt. He quickly spoke up again after a short pause, disliking the idea that Hadith might think of him as lonely or pathetic, pitiable. “I mean…not anymore… I mean, I had my mother, for a while, I guess…but there were my sisters and brother… I was older than them. Mostly I took care of them when my mother couldn’t. I never really felt like I “had” someone…in that way, at least…at least no one in particular…” he trailed off as he tried to put into words the deeper memories of his childhood. It had been only three, maybe four years, but he had already forgotten so much. It was astounding how quickly time could erase anything.

Yet again he felt he had successfully played off his loneliness as something of no matter, and he felt both filled with regret and stubborn determination. He would never ask for the help of others, he would never ask for another’s company… And yet he felt Hadith was undoubtedly the better man for being able to do so.

Suddenly there was a loud shout of someone calling for the camp’s attention, and both Adnan and Hadith’s heads shot up too look over in the direction it came from: only a few yards away where Khamir and Beloan stood. Adnan felt a sudden rush of fear. Were those golden monsters back for them already?
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