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Wouldn’t the whole question of gender be irrelevant? There would be no point to gender differences in beings who create by means of song etc. For is not the difference in gender merely purposeful for reproduction in the natural world. Illuvatar has not need to reproduce, nor the Ainur. That is unless I am greatly mistaken. I do not recall any of them having children.
But we are looking at this through the eyes of a gendered people. The Valar chose forms according to their temperament, and I would think that this was mainly so the elves and men (who they were exposed to prematurely in the music) might perceive those Valar better. Or because the Valar might indentify with one gender or the other as a personal preferance.
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