[Nurumaiel]

Adrama smoothed down the skirt of the simple green dress she was wearing as she looked at her mother with no little concern. The latter did not look well. She was a strange pale color, and her voice didn't sound quite as strong as it usually did. "Are you feeling well, Mother?" Adram asked. "You look rather ill."

"I feel well," Pelien replied. "I have no illness that ails me, but I am burdened with thought." Adrama's eyebrows raised slightly. "I'll tell you about it later, dear," Pelien said in a firm voice, letting her daughter know that direction of conversation was over for the present. "But onto lighter matters... You and Addruran are quite a handsome couple. Have you ever considered marrying him."

Lifting up her tea cup, Adrama spoke in a cool voice, "No, I really haven't, Mother. You see, I don't love him." She sipped her tea and her mother did likewise, but Adrama noted that the drink in her mother's cup was coffee, and concern began building in her again.

"But surely you realize it is hopeless for you to marry Denethor now?"

"Hopeless? Oh, Mother." Adrama hesitated between putting her cup back down again and taking another drink. Now she wished she had taken coffee, as well. Was her mother becoming frightened by the idea of carrying on trying to bring Denethor away from Finduilas? Perhaps that was why she was so nervous. Adrama felt anger building up inside of her. Well, if she were to be left alone in her task of winning Denethor back somehow, then so be it. She spoke, trying to keep the anger out of her voice. "Mother, I love Denethor and I have no thoughts of marrying Addruran."

"But the two of you look so perfect for each other..."

"Mother!" Adrama cried, setting her cup down so forcefully on the table that it was a miracle it didn't break, though most of it splashed out over the side. Pelien called for Rummel, but when the girl arrived Adrama stopped her from cleaning the tea. "Please, Rummel, I'll take care of that. It's my own fault. But could you just refill my cup? And I think I might need something stronger. Coffee for me, too?"

"Yes, miss," Rummel said, taking the cup.

Adrama took up her napkin and began mopping up the tea with it. Her mother did nothing but sit in her chair, unmoving, watching her daughter. Rummel returned with the coffee and Adrama thanked her, taking the cup and giving the girl the tea-stained napkin to take away. Then she sighed and met her mother's eyes. "I'm sorry, Mother," she said. "I shouldn't have shouted so. But I will not marry Addruran, and if the one who can make me will be so wonderful that words cannot describe how wonderful. Now, Mother, if you don't mind me speaking to you in a rather rude way, the subject is closed."

Pelien did not protest, and Adrama, satisfied, turned her eyes towards the window, not noticing the faint look of triumph that passed over her mother's face. Little did the girl know that her mother had been putting on an act, knowing that Adrama would rebel against her 'wishes.'

Adrama thought of many things as she looked out the window, but her main thoughts were towards her mother's rather ill appearance. Was the giving up of Denethor the reason for her pale face? But why would that cause her to look that way. Her mother had never been one to be frightened of telling bad news to anyone. So was it really...? Adrama hesitated and glanced at her mother. There was but one way to find out, and that was to simply ask.

"Mother..."

"Yes, Adrama?" Pelien was looking into her coffee cup, but when her daughter spoke she looked up and met the dark eyes that looked thoughtfully into her own. Adrama noticed that her mother hadn't taken very much of her coffee yet, and that also bothered her. Surely she would have drained the cup already if she were feeling so bad.

"Mother, I'm going to ask you a rather odd question, and I want a truthful answer," Adrama said firmly, ignoring her mother's surprised look. "Have you given up making Denethor forget Finduilas, or is there another cause for your pale face and wearied eyes? And if there is another reason, I beg you to tell me now." There was a silence, and Pelien didn't answer. "I'm your daughter, and I feel that I have some right to be told things that are happening in this family," Adrama said, her face flushing. "Something terrible has happened, and I ask you to tell me what it is. If you will not tell me, I will demand it. Have you given up the fight?"

"No, of course not," Pelien said sharply. "I want you to marry Denethor more than I ever did, and I will not given up so easily."

"Then why do you say it is hopeless, and why do you try to convince me to marry Addruran?" Adrama felt like bursting into tears. She was so confused, so frustrated. She asked questions, but she did not get answers, and everything remained dark and mysterious to her. Everyone seemed to be gathered in their own little corners, talking and plotting together, while she stood alone in the center, her cries for help falling on deaf ears.

"I simply wish to know if you want to marry him, Adrama. I do think you look well together." Pelien's voice was so sweet, so kind, so fake. Adrama wanted to scream in frustration. What was being hidden from her? Why did her mother try to avoid answering the questions that really mattered. Why did she say words that fell upon her daughter without meaning, as though she had other purposes behind her excuses?

"Mother, tell me now!" she cried, her eyes beginning to dim with tears of vexation. "What has happened? Tell me, I beg you. I will not turn against you, if you are to blame for it. And if you are not to blame, then cease hiding the answers and tell me plainly." With trembling fingers, Adrama picked up her cup and consumed some of the coffee, hoping it would strengthen her. Passing a hand across her eyes to wipe the tears away, she stood up and went to the window, taking deep breaths of the fresh air. Oh, help me, she screamed in her thoughts. Life is becoming too hard. I need help.

Staring dully at her daughter's back, Pelien began to speak.

[ September 10, 2003: Message edited by: Nurumaiel ]