View Single Post
Old 09-08-2022, 01:32 PM   #5
Pitchwife
Wight of the Old Forest
 
Pitchwife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Unattended on the railway station, in the litter at the dancehall
Posts: 3,355
Pitchwife is a guest of Galadriel in Lothlórien.Pitchwife is a guest of Galadriel in Lothlórien.Pitchwife is a guest of Galadriel in Lothlórien.Pitchwife is a guest of Galadriel in Lothlórien.Pitchwife is a guest of Galadriel in Lothlórien.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Oddwen View Post
We will not see any incidents of shield surfing until after the Fall of Numenor. Not because of any law, but simply because of a series of coincidences and butterfly effects that prevent it just before it happens.
Shield-surfing? Bah, that's so 2002! We now have sword-stepping, which is so much flashier! Galadriel will probably level up at some time and unlock the perk for dagger-stepping, and later still... bowstring-stepping? Smokering-stepping? The possibilities!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oddwen View Post
Elrond will grow his hair out - probably due to being too busy for haircuts while helping Celebrimbor at the forges. The weird "elf lords only" snipe seems to be an early indicator of some sort of racial purity push that will happen as a result of Sauron somehow - Elrond will be forced into exile, a subplot will be him founding Imladris and he will disappear for a few episodes until he unexpectedly shows up at the Last Alliance with a bunch of wood elves and/or men who refused to fight for Isildur/Gil-Galad, just in time to stab an orc that was just about to skewer Gil-Galad from behind. It'll be one of those hackneyed scenes where this particular orc is gloating before going in for the kill like some sort of dumb-dumb, only to be cut short, its only purpose to shield Elrond's new hair and wardrobe change from view for a moment before its carcase falls. No explanations will be given or demanded by the characters and Gil-Galad and Elrond will share a knowing glance and maybe clasp hands or forearms, before continuing to fight.
This is actually very likely to happen, except Elrond will now be Hugo Weaving (digitally de-aged by a few millennia) revealing that the other Elrond is actually an impostor android substituted for him by the Dwarves durin/g his last stay in Hazard-Doom for the purposes of some hidden agenda, like, I dunno... probably something to do with cheese.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Boro
I want to talk about this orc digging randomly underneath the citizens of Tirharad's floorboards. It appeared to be a lone orc so I imagine it was part of a convoy that just got lost. Where did all the orcs go, wondered Gil-galad? Well obviously, under people's floorboards. "That's not a sink hole, kid, it's an orc fortress."
One of the big reveals in this show is going to be that it was never Sauron who corrupted the orcs - it was the Dwarves who bred them as slaves to dig and burrow through lesser matter than stone which they feel is beneath their dignity. Their evil plan is to turn all of Middle-earth into one huge Swiss cheese (see above), and future episodes will feature orcs coming out of the woodwork everywhere, mounted on giant cockroaches.
__________________
Und aus dem Erebos kamen viele seelen herauf der abgeschiedenen toten.- Homer, Odyssey, Canto XI
Pitchwife is offline   Reply With Quote