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Originally Posted by Huinesoron
The subtitles say 'dreams', and given the Epilogue I think that might work better than 'sleep' here.
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That one was difficult, because the Russian word could meen either sleep or dream. But I take your point about the Epilogue, so dreams it is!
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Originally Posted by Hui
I love this line. I don't think she uses 'take' consistently enough that we need to match it.
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No, she changes that line up - every time she gets to it? A couple times at least.
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Originally Posted by Hui
I don't think 'have' fits... When in true love I rejoiced?
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Does "When in YOUR love I rejoiced" sound weird?
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Originally Posted by Hui
The first note is a long one, so 'I' would seem to work better. I... have no purpose without you?
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The thing that goes against is purPOSE. What about "I no purpose have without you?"
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Originally Posted by Hui
Okay, I can't sing this for biscuits, in either version, so I'm just going to have to trust your scansion.
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^.^ I needed that humour just about now.
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Originally Posted by Hui[i
The dusk, the dawn, the earth, the Sea
Were but created and set free
So that for one brief moment Luthien should be![/i]
'Set free' points to Finrod's theme of changing the Song, while 'one brief moment' references the fact that she's going to die. Neither of which Beren would mean, but, y'know, musical.
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Well that makes my choice easier!
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Originally Posted by Hui
The verdant* earth and northern sky
Without you meaningless do lie
Through you alone the world holds colour in my eye!
*Verdant over russet, because of this first line from Beren:
Forest is worn, lost is its green
Raiment
And then Luthien brings the colour back... 
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Hey, why not!
Though this time it took me a double take to place "verdant". :P
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Originally Posted by Hui
Hey, I recognise that!
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Yeah. The farther we go along, the more things repeat or need to be referenced.
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Originally Posted by Hui
Beeches in Neldoreth, holly in Region, and I believe birch in Brethil. I walked through a beech-wood a couple of weeks ago; they're astonishingly open forests, not like anything else I've seen. I can understand why Thingol would set up shop there.
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I guess that also explains why Luthein's days are still alight under their canopies. I looked at pictures of both trees online too and decided beeches look prettier for the image as well.
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Originally Posted by Hui
Overall, very nice! Even if both Berens take your 'When in love I have rejoiced' line and stretch... it... out.... end...... less................ ly.......... y. I really don't get their singing choices. o.O
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I think this one is on the composer.
As usual ran out of time for typing on mh phone and have to go get ready for work. I read Luthien and the Feanorians, and overall it sounds very good! I had a couple very minor suggestions, which I will post up whenever I can, but the whole thing flows quite wonderfully. :-) V1 ises a totally different version of the scene, where Luthien's answer is simply "Love belongs to two people only... and I'll take back what always has been mine!". I like V2 better because it has more development for both story and characters. Also, did CelNCur just get blood-zoned? ^.^