View Single Post
Old 07-17-2020, 06:59 PM   #119
Galadriel55
Blossom of Dwimordene
 
Galadriel55's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,299
Galadriel55 is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Galadriel55 is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Galadriel55 is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Galadriel55 is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Amarie: Wind

First of all, I am having a lot of trouble keeping on top of the melody in Russian (maybe that's why it never stuck in my memory). Therefore, I am having trouble with scansion with most lines, because even as I'm listening to the song in parallel and finger-counting the beats I still get lost. Therefore, will defer any rhyme/rhythm commentary for now and just stick to content and general comments. Maybe if I listen to it enough times the beat will come to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
The trickiest line is right near the end:

Before dawn
Let me become as the silent trees
Let me stay
In the Night - let pain cease

The idea, is something about becoming as sap and either staying in the night, or freezing in the night. I've tried my best, but was constrained by the rhymes (because I really wanted to keep 'Give to me sleep or give me peace' in the first line of the stanza). Also, the Russian uses two words for 'liquid associated with trees', but English mostly just uses sap. 'Syrup', I guess, but that has the wrong connotations.
Right! That! She wants to be, uhhh, sap and resin - and to, uhhh, solidify/freeze [and metaphorically stay] inside this night. Basically, she's making an oblique analogy to amber, where she is the sap that wants to freeze and not flow further, from what I can understand.

But the line that actually stood out to me is earlier in the stanza:

Quote:
Come the day
I'll remember once again my loss
"At dawn I want to accept the emptiness".
I feel that the line in Russian is out of sync with the rest, because right after she wants to freeze in time and never get to that dawn. So I'm confused about what she wants. If you wanna work an element of acceptance in somewhere, you have the "canonical" basis to do so. But in this spot I feel your take works much smoother.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
I also have no idea what she's going on about with the invisible bridge from Finrod's hand to the maple leaves, but that does seem to be what she's saying.
To maple stars, to be exact. Are they literal stars above maples or something? Or metaphorical star-shaped leaves? Who knows. *shrug*

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
I... don't think this song really fits in the musical, sad to say. It's a lovely tune, but where do you put it? Before 'Truth', so we hear Finrod is dead, and then nope, he's back on stage again? Or after, diluting his own death-song with his ex going 'actually that makes me a bit sad'?
I have to agree. A piece that I'm missing is what exactly is Amarie grieving here. Is she grieving Finrod's death? Is she grieving their parting (uhgain)? Is she just mad that he left her? It seems like she's a bit hormonal and latching onto the nearest thing for emotional outflow. In the middle of the song she becomes all hopeful and ?possibly refers to Finrod being reborn (When I speak your name the whole wood sings! Back From out of shadow come to me). But then she chastises him again for leaving (hey, didn't you already accept that piece half the musical ago?), and returns to not being at peace (yes, we got it already), and only then "feels the pang of his death", so to speak? This progression is messed up and is throwing me off completely.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
I think what's missing is the eucatastrophe element. Back in 'Heart', Amarie rejected her anger in order to send Finrod hope. Now, when he's coming back (albeit dead), she just mopes for a bit. She needs a verse or two of 'I will send the wind to bring you home'.
Exactly! And by the way, if she had that line, I would have loved it! Especially with all the references to the wind.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
(I know exactly why it was put before 'Truth' in the recording: to give Finrod time to change costume! But that's not really relevant to us.)
Well, it comes after Truth in the Libretto. And it makes sense, because if done logically this should be Amarie grieving Finrod's death but welcoming his rebirth back in the West.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hui
EDIT: You know what... I think they did do this, it's just lost in translation. Check out this alternate reading of the 'maples' verse:

Let my words flow out between us
Bear you back to star-leaved maples
And with your crown of golden locks
You will hang your head in answer when I ask:
Why did you turn from my side?
Yes, they sort of do it, with the "bridge". Except the imagery is lost, because rather than a bridge to any meaningful symbol, it's a bridge to some unheard of maple stars, and good luck figuring out what exactly Amarie means with her analogy - Finrod's connection to her? Finrod's connection to the West? His death? His power to bridge the worlds a la Glorfindel in LOTR? And it's followed by "you should be ashamed of yourself", which falls so anticlimactically.

For the record, I like your second version better, because it strengthens the element of connection between Finrod and Amarie and gives Amarie an active part of "wishing" him back. And if you rework the song to help Amarie untangle her feelings a little bit, I think it would not go amiss.

As for who the bridge goes to: unfortunately Google is right, and in the literal sense it does go from Finrod to the maple stars (I am still not convinced if these are supposed to be stars or leaves). But it's not a strong directionality, it could also just be two endpoints in no particular order. Both interpretations work fine, if this line is taken in isolation. It sticks a bit out of context, so it's hard to interpret it without the isolation.
__________________
You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera
Galadriel55 is offline   Reply With Quote