[Kuruharan]

Their behaviour seems to border on the suicidal sometimes, because for them not feeling ashamed in the Halls of their fathers is the central motivating force.

While I agree in a general sense with their desire to feel honored in the halls of their fathers, could you provide some specific instances of suicidal action on their part.

Theoden fought because he had to. He made every effort to salvage as much as he could out of the wreck. This stands in stark contrast to the actions of Feanor and Turin who led their people (or in Turin’s case, several peoples) down the road to ruin.

Yes, they go down in a blaze of glory, dragging too many unfortunates with them, but in the end the battle is going to come to them.

They could have fought in a manner that would have spread less havoc of their own creation to their side. Although, I believe Boromir to be a different case.

Lets take a look at Aragorn's 'ofermod' before the Black Gate, when he has just been given 'evidence' of Frodo's capture, the failure of the Quest. Defeat is inevitable, but he has been offered terms of surrender, & life & safety for his people. Does he take it, & 'live to fight another day'? No, he decides he will make a last stand against an overwhelming force, which, after it has destroyed his & his army, will go on & wipe out or enslave the rest of the West.

Ah, well, this is a different case. Aragorn and Company were there for a specific reason to do exactly as they did. Pride did not drive them there as much as necessity. Something needed to distract the Eye. Fighting him on his doorstep was the best means of keeping his attention away from the inside of his house. Feanor and Turin put people in bad spots that it was not necessary for them to be in.

he does what Beortnoth does & decides 'better death than dishonour'. And we know that Sauron wouldn't have simply slaughtered all & sundry, because he wanted slaves, not corpses.

He does not do what Beorhtnoth does because Beorhtnoth could have achieved a decisive victory by force of arms through fighting like a sensible general. Aragorn could not win by force of arms. He was endeavoring to do his part in a plan to defeat Sauron in which arms were a distraction away from the real issue.

And Sauron would have killed every member of the army. There were plenty of slaves in the Western lands to take and he’d want to set an example.

Turin inspires, so does Feanor. And the reason they inspire is due in large part (& whether Tolkien likes it or not) because of their ofermod.

While this is true to an extent, it would be better to have heroes to inspire future generations to act in a temperate manner. These sorts of heroes have a way of coming to bad ends and taking a lot of people with them.