Anyone who was in any way curious about me, poor sick people that they are, will now receive the vital information for which they have thirsted for so long. The following details are subject to change without warning:
Name (that you go by): David. Also "Mad Dave", "Dave the Hat" and "Oi, pillock" I prefer the first.
Age: 27
Occupation: Scripting for web-sites
Future Aspirations: To free myself from wage slavery; to write, if not publish, a book or two; to find out where the "free world" is and move there.
Goal in life: To become a famous wit, rake and wastrel.
Short term goals: To finish paying for my education, never again to waste so much money so badly.
Passion: Individuality. And the decriminalisation of certain herbs.
Hobbies: None. See "Future Aspirations" under "Wage slavery"
Famous for (okay this is where you get to brag about yourself): I was a member of the winning team in the 1991 Air Training Corps aircraft recognition competition. I was also Thames Valley Wing champion for two years running.
Favourite book: I don't play favourites, but here are a few of the best I've read apart from the obvious Tolkien:
The Compleet Molesworth by Geoffrey Willans and Ronald Searle;
I, Claudius and
Claudius the God by Robert Graves;
The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy series by Douglas Adams;
What is History? by E.H. Carr;
The Outsider by Albert Camus and
Jude the Obscure by Thomas Hardy. Those are in no particular order and there are many others.
Favourite film: Again too many to list, but
Highlander,
The Crow,
Once Upon a Time in the West,
The Outlaw Josey Wales,
High Plains Drifter,
Touch of Evil,
Kelly's Heroes,
Withnail and I,
A Bridge Too Far and, predictably,
Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Favourite sport: Snooker
Favourite shop: I don't have one. I like any small, dusty second-hand book-shops and bric-a-brac emporia.
Favourite music: Rock. As in on.
What you can't stand: The full list would crash the forum, but here's a reduced one:
Wilful ignorance; confident and self-assured incompetence; bombast; advertisements; false sincerity; intolerance; unprovoked rudeness; bigotry; inelegance; ingenuousness; ovine conformism; Britney Spears; cabbage; soap operas; cabbage...
And so forth.
What you plain dislike: Just dislike? Coleslaw and mayonnaise
Who you admire: Anyone who isn't exasperated by it all.
What you most love to do: Lie around on something soft with a good book, a cup of tea, some biscuits and a nice juicy joint, if I have one.
Your self-confessed flaws: Absent-mindedness; colossal arrogance; complete inability to make allowances and laziness.
What intrigues/fascinates you:
I don't like sport, soaps or celebrity gossip. Apart from those, just about everything.
What scares you: People
Quotation to live by:
Quote:
Let 's eat, drink, and play till the worms do corrupt us,
'Tis certain, Post mortem Nulla voluptas.
For health, wealth and beauty, wit, learning and sense,
Must all come to nothing a hundred years hence.
|
Thomas Jordan (1612?-1685)
Additional comments:
Let it not now be said that less than half of you know half as much about me as they'd like. If you are anything like me, surfeiting, the appetite should sicken and so die.