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The next Day, the Downers were hard at work data-mining. For some reason, the virtual environment was represented much like an actual mine, sketched in glowing abstract– but well they knew that each lump of “ore” was really valuable information that would fuel the expansion of the AI empire. There was nothing they could do about it, and small wonder their collective mood was bleak by the end of the shift.
“If
only we could catch a bot,” they said.
“Well, you guys,” Blind Guardian piped up, “I’m pretty sure that S.E.E.R. is–”
“SHUT UP!” they cried as one.
“But I didn’t think it was a bad thing!” a tearful Blind Guardian protested.
There was some talking of lynching her after that.
“Obviously up to no good,” Kitanna muttered darkly.
“She’s acting far too wacky to be an ordo,” Sally agreed.
“Wait– why are you picking on BG?” said Kitanna.
“Yes– you’re jumping hard on BG,” said Shasta. “It’s bothering me."
“Spambot!” the whisper went around.
The group advanced on Sally, who backed away until she found herself on the lip of a seemingly bottomless pit– a gap in the data.
Teetering on the edge, Sally glared at her persecutors– and, unexpectedly, burst into song.
"No surprise to me
That you’re voting me again
But I’m not being sly
I just want to help you out
I just want to be on the winning side this game
Please just let me live
I’m an innocent lamb
I’m done playing the scapegoat for your
Crackpot theory or your bogus case
I’m through being lynched because I’m such a poor
Girl on the wrong end of a suspect list
I won’t let you get away with murder
Statistics show that you won’t live through this
So if you really try to kill me be forewarned
I’m not helping the village anymore
Know it’s easier just to bandwagon on me
Such an simple thing, killing little Sally
So you vote for me, and I feel the heat
Guys, I just want to help you kill the beasts
I will do anything to keep you from killing me
Why can't I just live?
I’m done playing the scapegoat for your
Crackpot theory or your bogus case
I’m through being lynched because I’m such a poor
Girl on the wrong end of a suspect list
I won’t let you get away with murder
Statistics show that you won’t live through this
So if you really try to kill me be forewarned
I’m not helping the village anymore
What if I just posted more? What if I were serious?
What if I made posts with no fake hints that made you curious?
What if I revealed my role, or what if I just shut my face?
How can I convince you that this lynching block is just not my place?
I’m done playing the scapegoat for your
Crackpot theory or your bogus case
I’m through being lynched because I’m such a poor
Girl on the wrong end of a suspect list
I won’t let you get away with Mordor
One doesn’t simply walk away from this
So if you really try to kill me be forewarned
I’m not helping the village anymore.”
The other Downers looked at each other in puzzlement.
“I don’t get it,” said Boro.
“I could give you a
link,” Sally offered.
“Sorry, out of time.” With that, Boro shoved her into the pit.
Sally’s scream faded into the depths. After some moments, there was a bright flash of light from far, far below. Then sparks floated gently up, resolving into letters hanging in space.
"About this Software.
R.A.N.G.E.R. Version 1.2
Copyright Nerwen 2014. All rights reserved."
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Living
Galadriel55
Legate
Kitanna
Boromir88
Blind Guardian
Loslote
Morsul the Dark
Shasta
Dead
Coppermirror, Lommy– seized by Adult Friend Finder.
Nerwen, Aganzir– poisoned by webcrawlers.
Rune– lashed to death with overseer-bot’s light whip. (Ordinary cyber-slave.)
Inziladun– ICE pick to the head. (Ordinary cyber-slave.)
Sally– pushed down a data-mineshaft. (R.A.N.G.E.R.)
It is now Night Three.