Hold onto your dinners, folks!
I assign the aliens (also known as bacteria) which have been trying to eat my leg. It looks like they have been halted around the knee though they have left a right oozy mess behind them so my shin looks like I tried to put out the Pyre of Denethor. Hurrah for industrial strength intravenous antibiotics though!
I also assign disappointing Doctor Who specials that rip off Lara Croft and Harry Potter in an especially bad, lazy and unironic way. Especially when I am ill and have been looking forward to a feast of fun.
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Gordon's alive!
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