It makes perfect sense that women and men both should adore the story --
The heart of Tolkien's work is love. Think of how much a love story the LOTR truly is. It is a sweeping tale of love - love between friends, love of hearth and home, love of lands and peoples you have never seen but must protect against certain death and destruction. Think of how much love there is between the various characters: Sam and Frodo, Merry and Pippin, Aragorn and Arwen, Eowyn and Faramir, Gimli and Legolas, Aragorn and the hobbits, the Ents for their trees (and long lost Entwives!).
Yes it has swordfighting and killing and wizards and goblins, etc. - but they are not the driving force of the story. It is a sweeping saga in which any person, man or woman, can find themselves immediately and inextricably immersed! It appeals to everyone! No matter that there aren't many female characters. No matter that there is much bloodshed and fighting. All these things are secondary the real strength of the story.
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