Child: Uglug... I Am your father!
Uglug: No-ooooo!!
OR
Uglug: And would sir like Child with that?
OR EVEN
Child: Hey! You promised me a clown for my party!
Uglug: I CAN BE FUNNY! ... ... Erm... What do you get when you cross a Hobbit with an orc?
...
A freak of nature...
Child: ... MUMMY!!
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